Princess party favours for boys as an alternative to wands

[Colourfulchameleons]

DD(3) party is next weekend. The venue let you choose a theme and despite her brother putting some not so subtle pressure on her, she’s gone with princesses. There are a lot of boys attending and the venue are happy to do more neutral themes with the party bags but I was going to give little wands out.

I am perfectly happy for all the boys to have wands but I just don’t think they’ll be interested (and I do know the boys well; one is my own son.) Can anyone think of a small gift that’s a sort of equivalent?

So I may have solved this frogs

princesses and frogs are kind of related … and there will be spares if anyone desperately wants a frog.

This is why I’d disagree with the sword suggestions. Every party I’ve been to and the boys have swords (or even not a sword but anything sword like) they all start sword fighting and it becomes an accident waiting to happen

No, the wands are cheaper than the frogs I’ve linked.

But I do know my own son, and I know his friends and they aren’t going to want the same thing as three year old girls and I don’t see the point in giving them something they don’t want. If that is extreme guilty as charged 👍🏻

The wands I’ve ordered aren’t bubbles; would rather avoid that tbh.

I understand this may be about your own son and his preferences, but honestly my boy would have preferred a wand to those frogs. It doesn’t matter though either way, it’s only a party bag.

What is extreme is your insistence on reinforcing stereotypes this young age.

Magic is for everyone, OP. Wands are already gender-neutral. Maybe do a range of colours and let them pick, and if they don't want one, they don't get one, easy.

Frogs are a good idea, but be prepared for the girls to choose frogs too. Don't do the boy/girl divide yourself, let them choose.

I would have a party game with a wand as a prize and fix it for the specific girl to win. That way you have snuck the wand to her in plain sight and you don’t have to give everyone else an extra thing!

When my son was 2 he attended a Princess Party. There were no traditional boy items, and he refused everything shouting ‘tha no mine!’ I hadn’t realised he had internalised gender identity until that point! I can laugh about it now, but it was awful at the time as he was hungry but couldn’t possibly eat off a Princess plate! 🤣

Everyone needs the same thing. Swords are better than wands, bubble wands are better than wands. What do you even do with a wand? So most of the girls are likely to feel a bit miffed that the boys got something better just because they're boys. Giving different party bags for girls and boys at such a young age is just forcing miserable stereotypes on them. I thought we were done with that?

This is an absolute genius idea.

I’ve never been to a boy’s birthday party where the party favours were adapted to give the girls traditionally girl toys, so I don’t see any reason to adapt for boys in this case. It’s your DD’s party.

Even for 3 year old's birthday parties, we cave in to boys' demands.

This patriarchal rot runs deep.

haha this place! None of my boys or godsons would want a pretty wand either. I like the idea of Harry Potter type wands and some girls will want these too. Cue comments about plastic stuff and landfill…

Wizards have wands - if it’s good enough for Harry Potter it’s good enough for the boys!

What if some of the girls want frogs?

There aren’t really party games as such, it’s actually at a role play centre so most of the time will be playing thanks though.

@Nothavingfunrightnow they have demanded nothing. I’m sure in 99% of cases (not sure about one but it’s DS’s best friend so …) they’d say thank you because you know five out of six boys and all that (look it up if you don’t know it.) I’m just idly wondering, it isn’t a massive deal or anything. The HP wands were a good suggestion for instance but they are quite expensive.

Im very slightly wondering how it fits the theme so I would have maybe gone with crowns however if wands are wanted could you do a Harry Potter style.

Maybe you should work on your sons internalised gender stereotypes though. And maybe he has those stereotypes internalised because you are teaching them.

Also. This is a party for ONE child. What your son wants is irrelevant. This other little girl who didn't get a wand, her mum can get her one for her birthday. This is your daughter's birthday party. She wants princesses, why should her birthday be about everyone else's feelings. Again enforcing gender stereotypes that a girl can't possibly just have what she wants, she has to think about everyone else first.

Maybe boys could have shields and be brave knights

There's a funny video online where someone dresses up as a dragon and storms a princess party and all the little princesses have to take him down. Probably a bit young at 3

Wind up frogs but the girls would probably all want one

There’s some spare. I might just give everyone a frog and a wand at this rate. I regret starting this 😂

I am sorry that not all children like the same things. I am afraid my DS is a tractor loving princess scorning boy, and so are his friends. There’s more to him than that of course and his friends but it’s a kids party and I can’t realistically cater for their sensitive side in a multiple buy for under £10.

🤦🏽‍♀️ holy moly, and we all sit here wondering why women are socialised to please men?

Assuming the boys know your daughter, and are attending HER birthday party, give them what SHE likes! If they don’t want a wand, they don’t have to have one, but why are you showing your daughter how to please boys at the age of 3????

Foam swords, or just give everyone some of those giant bubbles, can probably bulk buy on amazon.

That’s really funny 😂 I think ds would eat off a princesses bum; he’s absolutely insatiable at the moment!

@MattDillonsEyebrows i don’t know why you’re blaming the boys - no one even knows they are getting wands etc. I am just wanting everyone to enjoy the party and I’m sure they will but it is a nice touch i think. I’ve a lot on my mind at the moment and this is nice distraction.

The boys are all five or under; I don’t think they are to blame for the downfall of society. And they are all actually lovely boys who would thank me politely for the wand but would most probably prefer a frog. Apart from one but DS likes him so …

Boys can have wands.

Don't start all this sexist bulshit of "boys toys and girls toys" with a 3 year old. What on earth is wrong with you?

God this is depressing. Swords for boys, different gifts to cater for the boys, reinforcing stereotypes. Yeah it might be what he ‘prefers’ OP, but why is that?