What are your views on drinking alcohol around children?

[Char1997]

What are people’s general thoughts on alcohol around children? I personally don’t consume any alcohol around my children at all as I don’t like the idea of them seeing me tipsy/drunk but I have friends who will drink heavily socially around their children and just wanted to know what people’s feelings are! Thanks!☺️

I wouldn't get drunk but having a few drinks is not a big deal.

If someone can't handle their drink or gets drunk, then I would argue they should teetotal around children.

In reality, I don't really ever see an acceptable reason to be drunk, but I'm of an age so take that bit with a grain of salt, I guess.

MN land of the uptight parents!
The same kids who will be sneaking vodka in a field in their teenage years.
Its been proven kids who grow up with strict attitudes to alcohol tend to drink young, trying the forbidden fruit.

This is the kind of dramatic response that makes children stop listening- because you're not listening.

I didn't say it was "drinking a bit more than usual." I agree it's concerning. I also didn't say I couldn't function without alcohol.

"Tipsy" to me means a bit giggly, slightly lowered inhibitions, not safe to drive. That would be me after a large glass of wine or two. "Drunk" is falling over, crying, being sick, making stupid decisions that will embarrass you the next day.

If you're not happy for your child to ever see you tipsy then that's your prerogative- it's not something that concerns me.

No issue as long as no one is blind drunk/aggressive etc. I often drink wine at meals and on a Saturday night in front of my kids, beer in the garden on a sunny day, we drink quite a lot as an extended family. But it’s casual low level drinking, no one is drunk. I have been quite drunk/tipsy in front of my kids twice, once last year after a massive celebration we hosted, and once earlier this year at my dad’s big birthday celebration. They are 14 and 11 now so find it quite funny. My 14yo I allow two bottles of beer a week now too.

It really is how it comes across, when you write

"I personally don’t consume any alcohol around my children at all as I don’t like the idea of them seeing me tipsy/drunk"

It reads as if you think that automatically happens when a person has an alcoholic drink. Which is why I, and many other posters have pointed out there are more than the two options of either never drinking alcohol or 'getting tipsy/drunk'.

These posts are so tedious, you know you will get your validation on MN on how wonderfully perfect you are for not drinking and of course the better parent than all those who shock horror drink around their kids.

My DB and SIL drink but not to excess around their DC. Bottle of wine, gin and tonic. DB said they went to a bbq at school friend of their son last weekend and said the parents really caned the drink and it looked like they did this a lot. DB even poured an extra glass of wine he was given (unseen) before they left into the garden. Parents are professional arty types. They have twin 6 year old girls as well as an 8 year old son.

You get parents who have wine o’clock every night and people say it’s fine or not and then you get those who only have a thimbleful of sherry at Christmas only.

Well actually I grew up in a household where we were offered wine with water and wine when we went to continental grandad’s house yet I still drank early (14) when I was younger.

I grew up around the pub trade. My family owned a pub for a period of time. My parents were very sociable when I was growing up and frequently drank around me, particularly my dad as a lot of it came from his playing football and being very much part of the local football scene.
I have absolutely no problems with drinking. I drink around my kids just not to the extent of trying to get pissed. But yeah I'll have wine at home with dinner they come to the village pub with us in the afternoons or or early evening. When we have social events with friends, we all drink other than those who are designated drivers. Obviously sometimes that's all the females in the group. Sometimes it's all the men in the group. Sometimes a mixture gone away for weekends with friends They've seen plenty of drinking on those events.
I think making alcohol taboo or not visible to a child can actually make it something it needn't be.

why would it bother you - they’re my kids and I make lots of choices other parents wouldn’t make, it’s not like avoiding excessive alcohol consumption is a safeguarding issue. FWIW - I grew up with teetotal parents and it didn’t make me not listen to them, it showed me that I could be confident and fun without relying on alcohol - despite enjoying a nice glass of wine! You get to choose how you want to be around your kids - and lots of great parents chose to use alcohol in moderation. However, if your attitude is that you’re fine because you’re not passed out in a pool of vomit… then yes, I think your attitude towards alcohol use in general is problematic, let alone around kids!

I said there was a massive gap between the two.

I would hope ALL parents recognise that passed out in a pool of vomit is not OK around kids and at that point SS would almost certainly get involved.

Where each parent draws the line is down to them, but pretending my comment said something it didn't say isn't helping your point.

You’d be surprised! There are some really awful parents out there, a lot of just meh parents and the threshold for involvement is quite high!

We’ve always had a drink around the DC, we go to family festivals and on holiday, those who abstain completely, do you never go on holiday with your children?

We used to have a drink or two when DD was around - as long as you're not obviously drunk and can still make decisions, I think it's fine.