Should DD take the morning after pill

[Diamond68]

DD(20) is on holidays in France with her boyfriend of 8 months. She called me this morning to tell me that they had sex (both of their first times) and that the condom broke. Her period is due tomorrow and she is worried. She asked if she should take the morning after pill. Once I checked that she was ok etc, I told her I think that she should. I know the side effects could ruin the last two days of her holidays but I just think its best. She is a great girl, doing really well in college as is her boyfriend and I would hate for her to become pregnant and throw that all off course. Did I advise her correctly?

I would expect a woman in her 20s to understand the basics of contraception

Does she speak French well enough to ask for the morning after pill?

Lax not lapse.

As she's already taken it she obviously managed to successfully navigate the pharmacy

How did the condom break? I thought that was a white lie people used to cover up a lack of contraception

MAP just stops you from ovulating. It’s no use in preventing a pregnancy where an egg has already been fertilised.

In DDs case I would still take MAP but make sure she understands it isn’t capable of reversing an existing “pregnancy “

As an aside, they need educated on how to use condoms. The air MUST fully be squeezed out of the condom so the teat bit is floppy and there’s no ballooning round about her partners penis. Otherwise they burst, which i imagine is what happened here.

Why so? Many, many young girls (and boys) have lack of understanding and even misunderstandings about many aspects of sex and sexual health. Surely this is not news to you? And the daughter is not her in 20s, she is only 20.

I would never have asked my mother. Id have made my own mind up. It's a private matter. She's 20 not 14.

Not every body can take the pill. My 19 year dd can’t.

as for questioning why the ops dd has gone to her for advice, really?!

some dds are close to their mothers you know, im so glad that all 3 of mine come to me with issues like this and we have that closeness.

I Can’t believe people think that’s weird!

I couldn’t go to my mum with issues like this

But then my mum was a controlling, over the top dramatic type of person. I’m not

MN is so weird about relationships with adult children. The day they turn 18, they are fully adult, should never need their mum and definitely should not confide in her about anything. It's sad. I'd hate to have that kind of relationship with my mum, and I hate for my DDs to feel like they couldn't talk to me if they needed to, about anything, be it condoms and MAP or anything else.

I'm very happily single with no plan to meet anyone anytime soon (or ever), so I doubt I will ever be in the position to need MAP/condoms, etc, but if I ever do, I wouldn't think twice about texting my mum and asking if she would mind picking it up from the chemist for me while she's out. I work full-time and don't live a 20-second walk away from the chemist as she does.

Why is it so triggering for many of you that this young woman had her first sex at 20, and subsequently spoke to her mother about the MAP? This was me at 19. Not everyone is having sex as a 15 year old!

If her period is due tomorrow it could be too late to take the morning after pill but If she usually ovulates quite soon after her period it would be worth taking, if she usually ovulates later in the cycle the sperm will die anyway before she ovulates

As grown ups we understand a lot of things in life, doesn’t mean people can’t ask for advice though does it

Thanks again to everyone who responded to my post. I am glad that my DD feels able to come to me for advise about these things. We are very close and I do realise that not everyone is lucky enough to have this kind of relationship with their mum. I wouldn't have discussed this with my mum at 20 for sure. Anyway, she took the pill and has more peace of mind now and she is making an appointment with the GP to sort out proper contraception. Thanks again.