If you have grown-up children, how do you spend your evenings/weekends?

[Jazzicatz]

Just that really? I’m 53, with a younger partner, but we never go out in the evenings. If you are of a similar age with older children, how do you spend your evenings?

i’m still working and go out. I think that when you have children, your life revolves around them, so when they become independent, you can lose your identity.

You’ve basically got out of the habit of going out. Be proactive moving forward. Book yourself theatre tickets or tickets to a concert. Join a tennis club, book yourself golf lessons, join a Bookclub, go to the cinema. Whatever you’re interested in, make an effort and go, either with or without your partner. It’s good to have a hobby just for you.

I’m envious of everyone’s energy! I’m late 50s, still working FT and I’m good for nothing in the evenings (I do have some health issues though). Usually spend them doing some sort of crafts, currently working on a cross stitch. Weekends I often do overtime on one day so the other day is then just catching up with life stuff.

I don’t have a partner so there’s no one else to say let’s go and do this or that and left to my own devices I often just don’t bother. I go to the occasional gig, cinema etc. But really no more than once a month.

Work just saps all my energy but I can’t afford to retire yet so it is what it is.

DH took early retirement, until recently I've been working part-time.

As we have more time the day, we don't often go out in the evenings unless with a group/couple, something in particular on like DH wanted to go to a talk last week, occasional theatre/local concert, fancy a curry.

A typical Saturday, DH gym in the morning. I tend to go for a walk, pick up a few groceries on way back. Might do online taichi, the odd job in house or read. In the afternoon we have a joint interest we both follow, so often do that. Sometimes there's a variation as we might go on a local hill walk including a coffee, see friends, take off for lunch somewhere.

Until recently I've worked Sundays for years. The first Sunday I had, we did our hill walk/coffee. Last week I did online taichi, and went down pub as my favourite tennis player was in a gran slam that wasn't on mainstream tv - DH joined me part of the time. This Sunday, we're about to go away, so food shopping/packing in the morning. DH seeing friends in the afternoon, so I might join them for one drink (we all get on very well together), then go for a potter around town.

Day trips are often done in the week as we have time together. Yesterday it was a free museum, park walk and potter around a nearby town.

57, both still working. DH runs 2 or 3 nights a week, I go to a dance class and pilates 2 nights, we have a takeaway and film on Friday nights, Saturday night, theatre, cinema, meal out. Sunday and the other week nights are for relaxing.

I also work FT. Exercise obviously takes energy but gives me more energy overall as I'm fit.

What a lovely thread! I’m in the same position but no partner (well, one who’s absent!) and was thinking the same. I just seem to do more work, write bits of my book, doomscroll & bits of cleaning. But mainly I doomscroll. Must change this.

I work long hours in a stressful job. By the time I get home at 7pm and have dinner it’s usually flop in front of the TV then bed.
We have a quiet life generally but our main evening outings are to go out for food on a weekend . DH and I also have separate hobbies at the weekend and we have a big garden that takes up a lot of time.

both late 50s and work full time. Last week, Monday went to see friends of DSS in a band in a pub, Tuesday met friends for something to eat, just quick catch up. Wednesday saw another band. Regular Thursday pub quiz, We don’t drink that much honest, there’s a lot of lime and soda.

most nights if we aren’t out we’ll take the dog for a walk, nicer in the summer as have beaches nearby. I go to Pilates once a week.

This is interesting. I'm late 50s, husband older. He is totally a home body and never goes out except with me. We both work FT, have very early starts, and are exhausted every evening so eat and watch TV. We go out at the weekends in the daytime and relax at home in the evenings. I have a few friends but we meet rarely now, a few times a year.

I do feel I need more interaction with people but I've always been a loner not a joiner, more so after being bullied at secondary school. I always feel a bit of an outsider, like I don't quite fit, and keep my distance from people. I find groups uncomfortable and can only cope with a few people at most. When I retire, I don't want to become an old person with a really narrow life though.

I've always had this weird thing where I hate having regular commitments too, I don't know why! Before some health issues I used to go to a pilates class once a week and that was fine but having lots of things every week fills me with horror. I wish it didn't, I'd like to be a social butterfly. 🙂

I don't have children. We are 50's. We hardly ever go out in the evenings- pilates once a week, Zumba once a week, occasionally out for a meal. In the summer we sit in the garden/do a bit of gardening/go for a walk. We read, watch TV, cook. It's what we like doing and I don't feel my brain is going to fail because of it!

Its just me & DH at home, nowhere near retirement age so both still work full time. Evenings usually just at home reading, watching tv, gym, try to get out a decent walk if the weather is agreeable. Regularly meet friends or DH for dinner after work. Weekends we like eating out, going for drinks, going to concerts and going for weekends away, again either with friends or just me & DH.

Im 51
Monday home usually watch TV
Tuesday choir
Wednesday cinema/life drawing/pub quiz
Thursday exercise class
Friday pub/party,/gig
Saturday sports match/pub/gig/out with friends
Sunday Either friends round for Sunday roast or just TV

We don't go out in the evenings often because we prefer not to. We eat, watch TV, have friends or family over, chat, read etc

Me and my husband work full time and our children are 17 and 24.
Mon-Fri he might draw or sculpt in the evening (his hobby) I go to the gym on Tuesday and Friday.
Weekends we either spend more time on our hobbies (mine is gardening or reading) we go abroad twice a year.. This year we are going alone on one of the holidays as dd17 asked to stay at home.
We meet with friends, and have probably 3/4 mini uk breaks a year and go to the cinema.

I think it's really important to either keep your social life going or develop one if you don't have one, especially in 50's+

I am still pasionately curious & have itchy feet for new places & experiences. Its envigorating & totally makes me feel alive!

Dh & i both work full time & we both have interests that take us to conferences / talks / seminars / events - our intetests are academic. We accompany each other on trips - so as an example i'll go to Paris or other city of interest with dh if he's researching something & i'll go to museums / galleries / wander while he's busy & then we meet for dinner & he fills me in & vice versa! I'm away on a 4 day trip related to my interest later in the summer & dh will come with me but he'll work by day & join me in the evenings

We have relatively niche interests & know lots of people in these fields.

Our jobs are also sociable as we work in the arts & there are so many events. We turn down more than we could go to & we attend a lot.

Carving a career in the arts is v challenging & financial precarity is a huge factor when getting established but i feel unbelievably lucky & rich to live this life & i wouldn't swap it for the world.

We do alot of daytime activities at the local leisure centre keeping fit and having fun.
We both like watching sport on the TV too. We like days out and picnics in the summer of course, and occasional walks. We attend lots of free activities in our town that are on yearly. Lots of music stuff. Bands in the Park. Free festivals. Walks, none of our days out cost us a huge amount.

Enjoy sitting in the garden, best room in the house when it's hot, plus there's always work to do in the garden. Lawn mowing, weeding, cutting back etc as there is stuff to do in the house.

We also like theatre. Attend the local theatre often. Occasionally a bigger show in the next big city where we get the train too. Sport and theatre are big things in our life.

We Have the occasional holiday/short break. I have a friend I meet up with occasionally for a catch up or we do something together,and dh has a friend he meets once a fortnight too for a morning out.

Life is ok, mostly, fingers crossed, and we are never bored. Sometimes it's good just to relax too.

I thought it was just me! If ever I sign up for a regular commitment, my heart sinks for some reason and it’s, “Oh, lord, I’ve got to go to Pilates on Tuesday.” I don’t like advance planning, either. I get in a stew about whether it will rain/i’ll get a cold/something else better will crop up (it never does).

But I do need a huge kick up the arse as I am increasingly at a loose end and need some sort of hobby which suits an unsporty, uncreative and unpopular person!

I am still pasionately curious & have itchy feet for new places & experiences. Its envigorating & totally makes me feel alive

I would say I'm still curious and I enjoy new places and experiences. Unfortunately though it doesn't have the same effect on me as it does on you! I do still do these things sometimes, but they leave me exhausted and drained, sometimes in physical pain, and I need a decent amount of "recovery" time. Hence these things are more "occasional treats" than every day activities.

I find I actually found my identity again when DD went to university.

Finally not "DD's mum" anymore but Reluctantbrit again. No more DD's activities/school first and me later.

DD and I have a joint interest and often did things together for it and I now carry on alone as she is too far away to just drop home for a weekend. And I must admit I enjoy the peace.

I work from home
An average week usually consists of the following - evenings

Gym four times a week
cinema/ theatre / local comedy shows
watch YT videos
language classes x2- online
Eating out
Doing absolutely nothing - I am inherently a lazy person and find joy in lazing around

This thread seems quite dominated by people who are retired and clearly have a good income to be able to afford all of these activities!

and

A lot of this sounds very daunting (and expensive!) to me

Where are you getting the impression that being out of the house, is expensive ?

It costs me nothing to volunteer at the Warm Welcome evening I volunteer at.
It costs me nothing to go to the discussion group.
It costs me nothing to meet my friends for a power walk.
It does cost me my subs to be member of a choir, but I'd hardly say that was expensive.
It doesn't cost to volunteer as a Guider / Scouter / other youth group Leader
It costs minimal 'subs' to belong to walking football / cricket / rounders teams
It doesn't cost to volunteer as a gardener at your local hospice.
It doesn't cost to belong to a book club or some craft groups / knit and natter type activities (depending if need to pay to hire room)
It doesn't cost to be an activist in a local project
It doesn't cost to be a 'friend of' local park.
It doesn't cost to be a committee member or Trustee of any of many voluntary organisations that are looking for more support.

etc etc etc

I work full time, I am 48 with a 19 year old daughter. I go to the gym three or four times a week, meet friends for dinner or brunches at weekends, cinema, exhibitions, binge watch shows, film night with DD. I went on holiday for two weeks solo earlier this year, she was happy for the peace and quiet!

Talk, read, play games, walk, radio or Spotify, plan holidays, watch you tube or Netflix.
We like to do stuff outside during the day when not working and relax in the evenings, we might go to the cinema once a month.

I’m 57, dp is 60, we work full time.

DP spends at least two evenings a week in online board gaming groups - intermittently these will meet f2f

We go to the pub about once a month. Gym, swimming and exercise classes more likely during the weekend days

We go to gigs, talks, plays, concerts, art exhibitions (those more often daytime) and occasional big sporting events

We meet up with friends just because, sometimes gaming or food

i go to book club

We like some tv but i do find men are much keener on tv than i am. Left to myself I read, listen to full albums, podcasts, radio programmes and have long baths. When I’m single I barely turn the tv on at all. Dp would watch every night.

My 30s were like that, I seemed to perk up in my 40s. The kids definitely wore me down in my 30s.