Page 2 | Is MN becoming more misogynistic or are there more trolls about?

Menopausio · 2026-06-09T05:27:55+00:00

Ive been here a fair while, change my username regularly ect. Is it just me or has this site changed from a bit of a safe haven for women to just being the same as RL? Have attirudes to women swung back to the middle ages or are there more troll posts?

Original poster

Menopausio · 09/06/2026 09:54

ilovesooty · 09/06/2026 08:25

It's a public forum. It's not a safe place.

Show quote history

It certainly isnt now days.

OP posts:

Original poster

Menopausio · 09/06/2026 09:56

LadyLooo · 09/06/2026 09:08

What safe space?

Surely you don't mean a public internet forum that you don't even have to join to read?

Show quote history

Yes, it used to feel safe. Im 53 now, a grandmother. I joined when my DC were teens. It felt like a community then.

OP posts:

TemperanceWest · 09/06/2026 09:59

ReleaseTheDucksOfWar · 09/06/2026 08:22

Over the years yes, I've seen things become more misogynistic.

I'm certain that Mumsnet has a proportion of women-hating men and also a proportion of seriously unpleasant individuals of (I guess) both genders who love kicking a vulnerable poster or twisting a situation into something unrecognisable so they can have a go at the OP.

Mumsnet is also being targetted by Russian propagandists and the far right wing, but that's another issue.

I'd say more misogynistic and more misanthropist, both. Actually, now I think of it, more misandrist too in some aspects. Which also creates a hating and hateful atmosphere.

I suspect Mumsnet viewing figures are dropping and I'm not surprised. Many posters who start a thread who are clearly genuine get attacked. Tough but compassionate love is one thing, a hostile environment no matter what is a different you say is another.

I agree with you.

TemperanceWest · 09/06/2026 10:00

BobbiBrewster · 09/06/2026 09:51

Online forums will never be a safe space. I have been here a long time (I name change frequently). I still find things to read and sometimes comment but would never start my own thread. MN reflects the outside world and is in many places full of anger, hate and yes, misogyny. Also, in the oddest places you have threads designed to create unrest and dissatisfaction. I used to like reading the 'property' threads but now you get nasty threads about people who live in social housing - trolls everywhere. I think in the end MN will just be populated by people 'shouting at bins' and genuine posters will vote with their feet.

Edited

🎯

LadyLooo · 09/06/2026 10:03

Menopausio · 09/06/2026 09:56

Yes, it used to feel safe. Im 53 now, a grandmother. I joined when my DC were teens. It felt like a community then.

Show quote history

It was likely naivety that made you feel safe then.

I've been on MN nearly 16 years and back then, people were giving all their personal details on threads simply because an OP would ask for them.

And the amount of 'successful' begging threads were through the roof because so many would automatically believe them.

That's why MNHQ had to compose their warning post.

Original poster

Menopausio · 09/06/2026 10:12

LadyLooo · 09/06/2026 10:03

It was likely naivety that made you feel safe then.

I've been on MN nearly 16 years and back then, people were giving all their personal details on threads simply because an OP would ask for them.

And the amount of 'successful' begging threads were through the roof because so many would automatically believe them.

That's why MNHQ had to compose their warning post.

Show quote history

I take your point on that, fair play.

OP posts:

trendysetter · 09/06/2026 11:52

I agreed with the OP on that thread, they'd already spent a chunk of the money on their OH and the kids so it wasn't like she spent it all on herself. There was nothing wrong with what she did (and I say that as someone not keen on gambling or cosmetic procedures.

I think the issue on here is often with SAHMs tbh. Not valued at all.

I agree with others though that anywhere online is never a safe space.

ilovesooty · 09/06/2026 11:55

Menopausio · 09/06/2026 09:54

It certainly isnt now days.

Show quote history

It isn't anyway. No one can surely believe any public, open forum can be a safe space. Nowadays is irrelevant.

DalmationalAnthem · 09/06/2026 11:55

Menopausio · 09/06/2026 07:55

No I expect a womans safe space to be safe for women.

Show quote history

A website with more than 9 million users is not safe, I don't think it ever implied it was a single sex space, or safe?
My email address and password were among 1000s released by a hacker of this website some years ago 🙃

Lugol · 09/06/2026 18:15

OtterlyAstounding · 09/06/2026 06:52

I just took a look at the Sex board, and eww, what an eyeopener 🤢 Clicked on one of the top five threads there, and it seemed unmistakably like a man fishing for wank fodder about a fetish he has. Read the first few pages, and felt bad for some of the women who appeared to be responding in good faith (as well as a good smattering of men who shared the fetish).

I certainly can't imagine any sensible woman wanting to ask advice on there - I can only imagine the men would fall upon her like a pack of ravenous dogs.

Show quote history

We can't even have that to ourselves.
A forum of predominantly women should be able to discuss sex freely and I bet there are loads of posters on MN would would love to ask questions or discuss something but can't because there are tonnes of hairy handed posters waiting to wank..😡

LadyLooo · 09/06/2026 18:37

Lugol · 09/06/2026 18:15

We can't even have that to ourselves.
A forum of predominantly women should be able to discuss sex freely and I bet there are loads of posters on MN would would love to ask questions or discuss something but can't because there are tonnes of hairy handed posters waiting to wank..😡

Show quote history

This was always going to happen when HQ introduced the sex topic.

And then guaranteed to happen when they reduced the time you had to be a member to post on it, down from 3 months to whatever it is now.

CaptianMunchen · 09/06/2026 22:23

Why is there an obsession with the sex board? When I have seen woman post on the relationship boards, they get some horrible comments, yet the sex board bothers so many on MN. If it were to be deleted, women would be pushed to ask questions on another topic. I would think they would get some awful replies. Amongst the good advice they receive from the sex people

As for wank fodder most men have access to all manner of things on their phones. The sex board is not particularly spicy. If anything, the real pervs will be in specific topics where they go unnoticed. The sex board is a well-policed place where doggie posters get banned.

Garyfromdownstairs · 10/06/2026 06:53

CaptianMunchen · 09/06/2026 22:23

Why is there an obsession with the sex board? When I have seen woman post on the relationship boards, they get some horrible comments, yet the sex board bothers so many on MN. If it were to be deleted, women would be pushed to ask questions on another topic. I would think they would get some awful replies. Amongst the good advice they receive from the sex people

As for wank fodder most men have access to all manner of things on their phones. The sex board is not particularly spicy. If anything, the real pervs will be in specific topics where they go unnoticed. The sex board is a well-policed place where doggie posters get banned.

I think a lot of people were/are put off because of the DMs they get after posting there. It's often complained about in site stuff, but there have been threads about it elsewhere so many people won't post there.

LilacDrift · 10/06/2026 07:04

CaptianMunchen · 09/06/2026 22:23

Why is there an obsession with the sex board? When I have seen woman post on the relationship boards, they get some horrible comments, yet the sex board bothers so many on MN. If it were to be deleted, women would be pushed to ask questions on another topic. I would think they would get some awful replies. Amongst the good advice they receive from the sex people

As for wank fodder most men have access to all manner of things on their phones. The sex board is not particularly spicy. If anything, the real pervs will be in specific topics where they go unnoticed. The sex board is a well-policed place where doggie posters get banned.

Do you seriously think that most women on MN are comfortable posting on the sex board? Where posting will get you a pervy PM? Or replies from pervy men?

The sex board is a no go area for most women on MN.

SpudGunToo · 10/06/2026 07:24

Menopausio · 09/06/2026 07:55

No I expect a womans safe space to be safe for women.

Show quote history

The site’s not supposed to be that though. The owners have always made clear that despite the name it’s not female-only.

CaptianMunchen · 10/06/2026 09:05

LilacDrift · 10/06/2026 07:04

Do you seriously think that most women on MN are comfortable posting on the sex board? Where posting will get you a pervy PM? Or replies from pervy men?

The sex board is a no go area for most women on MN.

Show quote history

I do concede the DMs are an issue, and there isn't much MN can do about that. The only thing is to delay the ability to DM for a period after sign-up, and I agree the time allowed before posting on the sex board should be increased.

@mumsnet

I don't believe that it is a no-go area for women. Many of the regular contributors can spot a perv a mile off and are reported and removed. I believe it is a very necessary place. I can't find an example, but on occasion, a thread will be moved from AIBU or the relationship board over to the sex board, and you can see the change in responses from the Sex people. Less judgment and far more supportive.

Some of the criticisms of the board are deeply offensive to women and men and are rooted in misogyny. Look at some of the recent threads about shame. Surely, we need to move past the " nice girls don't " mentality.