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Bored, alone and around strangers

37 replies

Emowoman90 · 06/06/2026 16:54

I need chat, I'm currently sat at a BBQ of people I have no idea who they are, no 1 is talking to me because again they don't no me either, my partner has gone off at the other side of the garden to chat, Im not going to follow him because then I look like a lost clingy partner that's not my style.

My social bactery has gone so I'm now resorting to my phone because I'm bored, tired and alone, how's everyone else's day going? Better than mine I hope 😂

OP posts:
doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 16:57

Sorry OP, but that is quite bizarre. Why not ask someone there that question?

Emowoman90 · 06/06/2026 16:58

doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 16:57

Sorry OP, but that is quite bizarre. Why not ask someone there that question?

Have done multiple times, I'm autistic my socal interaction dips after awhile 😞.

OP posts:
LivingLounge · 06/06/2026 17:01

I think it’s ok if you just go and join your partner OP, no-one will think you are lost and clingy.

RedTagAlan · 06/06/2026 17:02

Just have a wander around. Look at the flowers or something. You will soon get chatting to someone.

Ibi · 06/06/2026 17:03

Nobody is talking to you because you’re on your phone and a lot of people see that as rude in a social situation.

youalright · 06/06/2026 17:03

Is there kid there thats always a good conversation starter asking how old they are etc.

Larrythecatforpm · 06/06/2026 17:04

Go and ask someone how their day is or go up to your partner, nobody will speak to you if your on your phone

TheChosenTwo · 06/06/2026 17:05

Emowoman90 · 06/06/2026 16:58

Have done multiple times, I'm autistic my socal interaction dips after awhile 😞.

In that case maybe it’s time to sidle quietly
off home to chill out by yourself?
To most people, seeing someone sat with their nose in their phone at a social gathering makes it appear that they’re disinterested in the company around them.

PrueRamsay · 06/06/2026 17:06

Ask the host if you can help with anything. X

doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 17:14

What are your children up to? Could you go and engage with them?

Mimilamore · 06/06/2026 17:18

I always talked to the dog/ cat in these situations…. don’t go anymore

Friendlygingercat · 06/06/2026 17:28

A phone is for when you are waiting for something to happen like a doctor's appointment. When I see someone on a phone in a social situation like a party or restaurant I assume they are not interested in speaking or interacting.

doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 17:39

Friendlygingercat · 06/06/2026 17:28

A phone is for when you are waiting for something to happen like a doctor's appointment. When I see someone on a phone in a social situation like a party or restaurant I assume they are not interested in speaking or interacting.

I agree but the OP’s partner is being thoughtless to leave her alone when it is his friends and he knows how difficult social interaction can be for her.

SowhatWilliam · 06/06/2026 17:40

Hope it’s got a bit easier OP and that you’re now your OH?

swqa · 06/06/2026 17:43

Ibi · 06/06/2026 17:03

Nobody is talking to you because you’re on your phone and a lot of people see that as rude in a social situation.

I was just thinking this.

It's barely been two weeks since we had a very similar BBQ thread where the person was busy MNetting to moan about everything, whilst rudely ignoring the host and the other guests.

Apfelkuchen · 06/06/2026 17:43

I understand. Are you able to take a taxi home, as from experience the situation will not improve for you once your social battery is empty.
For those saying ‘just talk to someone’ that’s not how it works in this scenario, because to do so would take a superhuman effort and if successful, lead to more social demands to keep the conversation going.

swqa · 06/06/2026 17:45

Apfelkuchen · 06/06/2026 17:43

I understand. Are you able to take a taxi home, as from experience the situation will not improve for you once your social battery is empty.
For those saying ‘just talk to someone’ that’s not how it works in this scenario, because to do so would take a superhuman effort and if successful, lead to more social demands to keep the conversation going.

For those saying ‘just talk to someone’ that’s not how it works in this scenario, because to do so would take a superhuman effort and if successful, lead to more social demands to keep the conversation going.

So why accept the invitation in the first place?

It's not like the OP doesn't know her own self.

doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 17:52

swqa · 06/06/2026 17:45

For those saying ‘just talk to someone’ that’s not how it works in this scenario, because to do so would take a superhuman effort and if successful, lead to more social demands to keep the conversation going.

So why accept the invitation in the first place?

It's not like the OP doesn't know her own self.

Her partner wanted her to go but seems to have abandoned her there to fend for herself. I couldn’t cope with that but my partner would stay with me if I managed to get myself to attend.

warmsmell · 06/06/2026 17:54

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

swqa · 06/06/2026 17:55

doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 17:52

Her partner wanted her to go but seems to have abandoned her there to fend for herself. I couldn’t cope with that but my partner would stay with me if I managed to get myself to attend.

He hasn't 'abandoned' her, don't be so dramatic.

He's simply walked to the other end of the garden to chat to some people, which he should be allowed to do.

doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 17:59

swqa · 06/06/2026 17:55

He hasn't 'abandoned' her, don't be so dramatic.

He's simply walked to the other end of the garden to chat to some people, which he should be allowed to do.

I would feel abandoned in that situation. I don’t have autism but I do have social anxiety and avoidant personality disorder so I can empathise with how the OP is feeling

swqa · 06/06/2026 18:02

doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 17:59

I would feel abandoned in that situation. I don’t have autism but I do have social anxiety and avoidant personality disorder so I can empathise with how the OP is feeling

But again, the OP knows her own self and chose to attend.

It wouldn't be fair to prevent her DH from doing a bit of socialising at a social occasion, when he is capable.

It doesn't mean she's been 'abandoned' for goodness sake.

Dreamcatcherat50 · 06/06/2026 18:06

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Dreamcatcherat50 · 06/06/2026 18:08

OP you're allowed to leave. Going to these things isn't the law. Staying for hours and hours definitely isn't.

Look after yourself. Go home.

doesthatmakemecrazier · 06/06/2026 18:08

swqa · 06/06/2026 18:02

But again, the OP knows her own self and chose to attend.

It wouldn't be fair to prevent her DH from doing a bit of socialising at a social occasion, when he is capable.

It doesn't mean she's been 'abandoned' for goodness sake.

You are determined not to understand. She didn’t want to go but she went for her partners benefit.

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