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Bragging, everywhere bragging!

108 replies

bafta16 · 21/04/2026 15:19

Holidays, gardens, Grandchildren. On and on it goes.

So weary of it.
Reading too much as I'm unwell.

OP posts:
Bingbangboo · Yesterday 08:08

These type of threads puzzle me. I genuinely wonder what they go on social media looking for then? Of course people post about the happy things in their life. I don't think it's bragging at all. Would you like to see my sink full of dishes, or my fence panel that blew down about 3 storms ago that I still haven't had replaced? My dog was sick on my quilt last week but I didn't think to photograph it!

People are obviously far more likely to take and post photos when they're happy or doing something exciting. If it makes you sad to see it, then either take yourself away from it, or work to improve your own happiness.

CoralOP · Yesterday 08:17

When I see people I know sharing holiday photos I'm so excited and happy for them, it genuinely light up and hope they are having a great time. This is your mindset rather than people posting about their life.

DiamondsAndDenial · Yesterday 08:24

Would you like to see my sink full of dishes, or my fence panel that blew down about 3 storms ago that I still haven't had replaced? My dog was sick on my quilt last week but I didn't think to photograph it!

Exactly. People photograph happy moments because they want to remember those times and feel good, I dont wish to photograph the enormous pile of laundry that I have to do because why on earth would I (or anyone else) want to look at photos of that?

There are so many other interesting things to do online, read up about, listen to, get inspired by- the choice is literally endless, I truly dont get why you'd continue to look at something that apparently makes you feel miserable.

ainsleysanob · Yesterday 08:31

WimpoleHat · Yesterday 07:57

Are we to be ashamed and hide our lives?

Not at all. But there’s a big middle ground between hiding your life and posting it all over the internet for public consumption. And the problem with social media is that it lacks all the filters we would naturally apply in teal
life. So it’s fine to talk about an expensive holiday with a friend in similar circumstances, but grossly insensitive if it’s to a friend where most has just been made redundant or is struggling for cash. Fine to talk about your pregnancy to family and friends - but you wouldn’t show a friend who’d just suffered a miscarriage 29 photos of your baby shower. And so on and so on.

There’s also a general lack of self awareness about a lot of these things. Basically- most people don’t care that much about what others are doing - and if they do, they’ll be in touch to ask them. So it’s performative by nature, to some extent, I think. And - human nature being what it is - I’m sure there are as many acquaintances who would sneer at whatever is on Facebook as will be impressed by it anyway.

Your last paragraph you say people don’t care that much about what others are doing! Well, then it doesn’t matter what people post! I had 6 cycles of IVF and 5 miscarriages to get my boy, should I have not posted in case someone had 7 cycles and 6 losses? If a person can’t look at positive posts with making a comparison with their own lives then they shouldn’t be online.

youalright · Yesterday 08:54

WimpoleHat · Yesterday 07:57

Are we to be ashamed and hide our lives?

Not at all. But there’s a big middle ground between hiding your life and posting it all over the internet for public consumption. And the problem with social media is that it lacks all the filters we would naturally apply in teal
life. So it’s fine to talk about an expensive holiday with a friend in similar circumstances, but grossly insensitive if it’s to a friend where most has just been made redundant or is struggling for cash. Fine to talk about your pregnancy to family and friends - but you wouldn’t show a friend who’d just suffered a miscarriage 29 photos of your baby shower. And so on and so on.

There’s also a general lack of self awareness about a lot of these things. Basically- most people don’t care that much about what others are doing - and if they do, they’ll be in touch to ask them. So it’s performative by nature, to some extent, I think. And - human nature being what it is - I’m sure there are as many acquaintances who would sneer at whatever is on Facebook as will be impressed by it anyway.

This is a you problem, i want to see happy things i want to see what my friends are up to. I'm not 2 i don't get upset or jealous because someone has something I don't have.

youalright · Yesterday 08:55

CoralOP · Yesterday 08:17

When I see people I know sharing holiday photos I'm so excited and happy for them, it genuinely light up and hope they are having a great time. This is your mindset rather than people posting about their life.

Same I love it and plus its a good opportunity to see different places to see if its somewhere we might want to go in the future

Beachtastic · Yesterday 08:58

Hmmm the only people I know who "brag" on social media are sad fuckers whose life is actually rather dull. They try to spice it up as best they can with shiny new things and events.

DH and I have a fantastic life in all the ways that suit us (not Insta stuff), and one of the things about being truly happy is that you don't feel the need for a round of applause every 5 minutes.

Sounds as though you need to find out what makes you tick, OP. Have you tried doing The Artist's Way?

Bered · Yesterday 08:59

youalright · Yesterday 08:55

Same I love it and plus its a good opportunity to see different places to see if its somewhere we might want to go in the future

Plus I am nosy. So standing in queue at post office… perfect for swiping through someone you vaguely remember from uni’s holiday pics!

Bered · Yesterday 09:00

Beachtastic · Yesterday 08:58

Hmmm the only people I know who "brag" on social media are sad fuckers whose life is actually rather dull. They try to spice it up as best they can with shiny new things and events.

DH and I have a fantastic life in all the ways that suit us (not Insta stuff), and one of the things about being truly happy is that you don't feel the need for a round of applause every 5 minutes.

Sounds as though you need to find out what makes you tick, OP. Have you tried doing The Artist's Way?

one of the things about being truly happy is that you don't feel the need for a round of applause every 5 minutes.

also not feeling depressed and pissed off when you see others doing things you can’t or don’t want to do

RampantIvy · Yesterday 09:03

Bered · Yesterday 08:00

And so do you feel sad / ashamed / undermined when you see a poster talking about their son or daughter’s sports successes?

No, not at all.

RampantIvy · Yesterday 09:05

Braggingorlife · Yesterday 07:39

You are always complaining about others bragging who are mostly just talking about their lives and post very detailed posts about your daughter, husband etc which by your criteria are bragging. Read your posts.

People who are bothered need to look at what is lacking in their lives and then either adjust or don't read.

OK.

I just dislike bragging. I have a lot to brag about but I don't because I was brought up not to.

Bered · Yesterday 09:05

RampantIvy · Yesterday 09:03

No, not at all.

And it doesn’t strike you as that proud pusher being insensitive and thoughtless, does it

RampantIvy · Yesterday 09:06

Bered · Yesterday 09:05

And it doesn’t strike you as that proud pusher being insensitive and thoughtless, does it

???

angelos02 · Yesterday 09:06

I cringe at most of the stuff people post on SM. It is virtually never anything out of the ordinary or interesting.

youalright · Yesterday 09:06

RampantIvy · Yesterday 09:05

OK.

I just dislike bragging. I have a lot to brag about but I don't because I was brought up not to.

But what's bragging and what's just sharing happy moments of your life. I don't think I've ever experienced anyone bragging because I just don't view it like that

Pricelessadvice · Yesterday 09:10

AttentionPlease · Yesterday 07:54

My mother had such an extreme version of this mindset that she was mortified that I did very well in the equivalent of A Levels and won a university scholarship that was reported in the local paper — if the neighbours mentioned it, she would dismiss it as me being ‘too lazy to get a job’. She thought people would think I was ‘getting above myself’.

As an adult I’m completely unapologetic about my achievements.

That’s sad. My mum was so supportive and proud of me and told me all the time, but she didn’t believe other people wanted to hear about it constantly.
I agree with her mindset to be honest, I think people just come across as huge show offs if they talk constantly about their achievements.

Pricelessadvice · Yesterday 09:11

Bingbangboo · Yesterday 08:08

These type of threads puzzle me. I genuinely wonder what they go on social media looking for then? Of course people post about the happy things in their life. I don't think it's bragging at all. Would you like to see my sink full of dishes, or my fence panel that blew down about 3 storms ago that I still haven't had replaced? My dog was sick on my quilt last week but I didn't think to photograph it!

People are obviously far more likely to take and post photos when they're happy or doing something exciting. If it makes you sad to see it, then either take yourself away from it, or work to improve your own happiness.

You see, I’m more likely to post the dog vomit with an amusing accompanying comment.

Paradoes · Yesterday 09:16

Come off social media as in following friends and go on Instagram for nice content- gardening, baking etc.

Lookinsidemygarden is lovely and positive and a nice one to follow. The creator started a beautiful garden on a budget.

Braggingorlife · Yesterday 09:27

But you do post things that by your definition would be bragging @RampantIvy often started by I dislike bragging and I could brag by saying x like your DD got a First from a Red brick, her second degree, your husband being an industry leader.

Personally I am happy for people to have nice holidays and do well in life and I don't want to see pictures of dog vomit. I've never even when I was seriously unwell for a year felt sorry for myself and resented others success. I was brought up not to feel sorry for myself, to celebrate achievements and to work hard. Any genuine friends are not bitter when someone else achieves. When I was ill I really learnt people's true character and some could not stand anyone being ill and others could not stand anyone having anything they couldn't. People who get upset by posts generally cannot stand others having something they can't.

Braggingorlife · Yesterday 09:33

youalright · Yesterday 09:06

But what's bragging and what's just sharing happy moments of your life. I don't think I've ever experienced anyone bragging because I just don't view it like that

I am exactly the same. I just see it as sharing moments in your life. I share good things and difficult things and if you had to never say anything anyone would get jealous of or sad about you would say nothing. People on here with stage 4 cancer complain/are sad about people with not stage 4 cancer doing chemo. So by that definition someone with stage 3 cancer undergoing chemo is bragging? People get jealous of people getting UC on here so the people mentioning it are bragging they have a disabled adult?

Bered · Yesterday 09:34

RampantIvy · Yesterday 09:06

???

It doesn’t strike you that the proud poster posting about their child’s sporting success is being braggy and insensitive does it?

MaturingCheeseball · Yesterday 09:44

I have no problem with people’s holiday pics or a graduation or wotnot. But I have an old schoolfriend who still does The Christmas Letter. Omg if takes bragginess to new heights: wonderful career, successful dcs, handsome dh, oodles of friends and social events… This past year she even had an elderly aunt die who “left a little legacy” so her two dcs could each buy a flat. I imagine all over the country recipients of the letter groaning.

Grimpleacher567 · Yesterday 10:06

I’m with you op.

Facebook posts I don’t mind so much as they are dwindling in number overall and I like hearing about the achievements of family and friends especially if it comes from
a place of genuine love and pride. There is a balance to be struck though I agree!

What has started to get to me recently - so I have desisted from watching them - are certain Instagram posts by country or horsey women, or both, who live in idyllic period cottages and embody the phrase “very pleased with themselves”.

It’s so very cringe, They post their children and animals for clicks and presumably revenue, and “accidentally” allow ponies in to their picturesque country cottage to eat tea and cakes off the dining room table! Oh how quaint and charming and not at all contrived! 😄🤨. Or they film themselves foraging or flower arranging.

Some of them have recently started doing Q&As and I am absolutely flabbergasted frankly at the amount of self assurance one has to possess in order to assume that anyone is remotely interested in you to that extent, whether you receive questions on-line from gullible overseas viewers or not.

Ditto women flouncing around in gingham frocks baking soda bread in designer country kitchens!

Come on women of Instagram! We can do better!

I don’t dislike this self-referential stuff because I am jealous btw , as I live on a farm myself, but I detest the exploitation of children combined with an almost moralising tone about giving your children an upbringing without screens! The smugness and hypocrisy is astounding!

I am not remotely holy but I was brought up Catholic and although there is a lot wrong with the religion, at least you are taught that at one and the same time you are special but in the grand scheme of things you are nothing too, certainly you are the same as everyone else in God’s eyes, and when you die, the world carries on just fine without you. 😄 And of course your character is far more important than your looks or possessions. And I think tfat’s a salutary lesson tbh.

mcmuffin22 · Yesterday 10:11

youalright · Yesterday 09:06

But what's bragging and what's just sharing happy moments of your life. I don't think I've ever experienced anyone bragging because I just don't view it like that

There's a fine line but it has become much more acceptable to reel off your achievements/ wealth apropos of nothing.

FettchYeSandbagges · Yesterday 10:13

dizzydizzydizzy · 21/04/2026 16:11

That is what Facebook is for. It’s the modern version of the annual Christmas letter.

I'd rather wait till Christmas and get it once rather than every day! Trouble is, not only do I see all these posts to start with, whenever anybody comments or likes any of these posts I see the thing again and again. I love the person dearly, but dear me, it gets wearing. 😂

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