Do spontaneous surges of happiness become less common in your late 40s?

[satinbrew]

If you are say late 40's and older, how often do you get a surge of just great mood / mild euphoria for literally no reason? I feel that when I was younger like in my teens and 20's I would just get this surge of happiness every so often for no real reason just a sort of Friday / Weekend buzz or a song on the radio that just got me buzzing. I suppose you could also call it a sort of feeling of wellbeing and happiness.

I've just realised that doesn't really happen anymore and probably hasn't for a while.

Things are fine and I am happy but maybe just jaded or perhaps its my hormones dose diving.

Anyone else noticed this decline in spontaneous good mood or wellbeing at this age?

@hobbledyhoy I think it is quite spontaneous so like when I was younger I'd be at the gym and a good song would come on and I'd get this surge of joy even before I was working out, now I have to force myself to workout! Or it would be Friday night and wouldn't even have anything planned and suddenly just feel a bit euphoric and happy. Even just a dinner I liked or being out for a walk could get me buzzing.

I'm not sure I remember having surges of happiness. But I do feel a bit Meh at the moment, even things that I enjoy are just things in my diary to finish. But I just turned 50 so according the graph the only way is up!

Since coming into 40s the main feeling is anxiety here 😢

@satinbrewI kind of get what you mean. I suppose it hasn’t really happened to me much in that way, maybe I’m broken! 😂

Never had these

@hobbledyhoy I'm sure everyone is different. I suppose people prone to the ups might also be more prone to the downs or perhaps its all about hormones? I probably used to be a lot fitter back then and that probably helped.

Me too. I’m 40. Have been noticing lately that I don’t feel true happiness much (despite having a lovely life which makes me feel totally ungrateful and guilty!) and wondering how to change that.

Same.

I wonder if those who do get that happy wellbeing feeling think it is down to anything in particular?

The people I know who are happiest in their 50s and beyond spent a lot of time in their 40s 'sorting shit out' in a practical way and in their heads. They downsized, found less stressful job or jobs that made them happier, reduced working hours. They also spent a lot of time doing mental homework. Working out what stole their confidence, their hang ups, the things that had held them back (perhaps all their life) and did stuff about it. You get to a stage where If you don't deal with the things that hold you back they stay with you forever.

I also think a lot of it is just age. You've survived a lot and you're still here. If you're lucky you have people you love and who love you You care less what people think about you, time is precious.

Oh I used to get this more in my twenties. Before I had a child and most of my time was mine. But yesterday I put my headphones on and had a little dance while I was cooking dinner and got a little surge.

it’s so rare tho. I def used to get it on a Friday. Particularly a sunny Friday afternoon!

I used to get them frequently when I was in my teens and twenties and I would say they've consistently declined by decade. I think I used to get them most when I felt self-reliant, attractive, and confident in myself - which may be a direct correlation with that decline too!
I wonder if I might get them back if I challenged myself to do scary things and had to rely on myself more?
The last time I can remember having one was about 9 months ago when I was on a long solo drive to meet an old friend - driving into the evening sun as I came down the hill towards Devon, with great music blaring on the stereo. Deep happiness!

I still get them occasionally (in my 60's now,) but to be honest, the last ten years or so I've been far more likely to get spontaneous surges of rage and a refusal to tolerate bullshit from people any more.😂

I get that when the sun comes out. I’m 50.

@Bezaz I do wonder if it is something to do with confidence and yes feeling strong and attractive! As I say elsewhere a friend of mine who is using testosterone as part of her perimenopausal HRT seems to think that taking testosterone has really helped her get that buzz back, a bit more drive and so on. I still workout but these days I go though the motions a bit and its hard to plan a major new adventure when I am the support system for so many people!

Lol, yes I might be with you on the spontaneous rage!

@satinbrew you said "when I am the support system for so many people" - yes I think it gives you little time to manage your own wellbeing when you are arranging everything for those around you, and you do tend to lose your sense of self.
I have a little idea of a solo trip abroad at some point, to hopefully get some of my va/va/voom back z

@Bezaz Enjoy it, I'll do this when I can at some point!

A couple of years ago I couldn't remember the last time I felt properly happy. No joy, a lot of stress. I was going through a horrible time at work plus difficulties with kids at home. I could remember happiness but didn't really feel it any more. Even in the good times.

Left that job and slowly recovered from the anxiety and burn-out. Now I very often feel happy and joyful because of sunshine, friends, a workout, music, art, family... even if my kids are still difficult. I'm 40.

I think your unhappiness is the realisation that times have changed and your connections to others are dying out. Age is a number in nature, and can be daunting. I see the bright side. But we have to like being alone and hanging with a tough crowd as we grow up.

Do you mean when it’s a good day for putting washing out? 😉

@Pryceosh1987 I don't think so actually, I've always been very happy in my own company to be honest. And I still have a lot of meaningful connection where I want it. Perhaps its different for everyone? I think for me its more to do with perimenopause, not being as fit or strong as I was and not having as much time to spend on personal passions.

I am easily pleased and have always had these surges.

oooh lunch! Whoosh! 😂

I get loads still, it hasn’t changed. Laugh loads too. I think it’s more a sign of being unhappy in life rather than age.

@QueefQueen80s I don't think I'm unhappy really, maybe just having a worse than average perimenopause and not much time to myself at the moment?

It does sound like you have a lot of people relying on you, it sounds stressful