Youngish dad - less limiting now than for a long while?

[TonysBaloneys]

All being well should be a grandma by the end of Summer. My son will be twenty one a few months later and I think outside of considerations around relationship length actually there are fewer reasons not to do this at twenty now than for a long while. Working for another five or ten years doesn’t bring the relative freedoms it once did. Jobs are unpredictable and the merits of being a youthful parent may yet be a great thing. Certainly I will get to be a livelier grandparent. His experiment will be more akin to the one my grandparents had living near family and using schools family has attended. I can’t see the negatives I might once have.

I think if both are working and they have a home (rented or bought either is fine) then it’s a good age for the energy of parent and grandparent. He will definitely be unusual though. Average age for a first time dad is 34!

What do you mean by "Working for another five or ten years doesn’t bring the relative freedoms it once did." OP?

Well I worked for five years and owed a whole house! That sense of being proportionally ahead seems to have been done for as the cost length of mortgage is so much more. It’s harder to get fast progression in many careers and competition for jobs is fierce. Feels less easy for many youngsters to get started and keep progressing.

Thanks @TonysBaloneys .

I don't think of those things as freedoms though, especially in one's early 20s. Freedom to me then meant unencumbered by things that tie you down - like career progression plans, mortgages, house maintenance, utility bills and children.

Those youthful years of exploring all options, trying new things, meeting new people, the opportunity to change on a whim, going to new places, living in different ways - that felt like freedom.

When you said "there are fewer reasons not to do this (have children young) at twenty now than for a long while" I thought, well, there is the lack of freedom, the closing down of options and the committing 100% before you've really explored who you are as an adult/single person. Children are forever and when you're 20 you have no real concept of what forever will feel like.

Everyone is different of course and your son sounds as though he has his head screwed on. I wish your family much happiness.

@RobinInTheCrabApple thanks for the good wishes:)

I agree about the fun freedoms - I think I had already discounted them as not his thing. I loved travelling and new places and spontaneous frivolity but he is very very erm not like that. It interrupts his routines. I understand why he has so many older friends now I think about it!
Hopefully his full nature and my excitability will be a good combo!