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Original poster

Husband pressuring me to stop contraception and have another child

31 replies

Forella675 · 15/03/2026 18:57

Hello im wanting some advice pls im married to my husband for 14yrs now we have 3 children my husband is demanding to have a 4th child with me i am currently having contraception pills hes telling me to stop taking them and asking me during sex if i stopped and for me to swear on my 3 children that i have stopped taking them because in that moment he wants to have with me a 4th child i tried talking to him expressing my feelings it just dosent work pls give me some advice

OP posts:
Bringemout · 15/03/2026 20:49

You say you started looking after yourself? So you are taking more care of your appearance and you want a job? He’s abusive and controlling, he doesn’t want you to have a life outside of him and the kids so you don’t wander off. If you do get a job I guarantee he will start acting like you are having an affair with a work colleague.

Amiacoolorwarmcolour · 15/03/2026 20:50

Have a conversation with him, not during sex.
Tell him that YOU do not want another child. That YOU are not prepared to go through pregnancy again. That YOU will not go through labour again. Using the language ‘I’ means he cannot persuade you. It stops him being able to put forward coercive reasons.

Original poster
Forella675 · 15/03/2026 20:51

I will tell him im getting a implant in and see if he accepts it if not then i will have to have a conversation about it if he dosent accept then that will be a goodbye for him coz theres no point me telling him im not taking pills and then he will get his hopes up and i have a implant marrige is about trust thank you all for your replys and i wish you all the best xx

OP posts:
sunsetsites · 15/03/2026 20:51

Forella675 · 15/03/2026 20:41

Thanks for all your replys no just want to address hes not an abusive partner in anyway to me hes a great dad and hes not taking no money away from me i have my own money just the problem is the insisting a 4th child

That’s abusive…

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/03/2026 20:52

Forella675 · 15/03/2026 20:51

I will tell him im getting a implant in and see if he accepts it if not then i will have to have a conversation about it if he dosent accept then that will be a goodbye for him coz theres no point me telling him im not taking pills and then he will get his hopes up and i have a implant marrige is about trust thank you all for your replys and i wish you all the best xx

Get it done first. Talk to the GP before you say a word to him.

begonefoulclutter · 15/03/2026 22:25

Forella675 · 15/03/2026 20:44

Yes i have worked 6 yr strait then went on maternity leave now my little one nearly turning 5 but she started school already was thinking of getting a job

Maybe he wants you to be trapped at home for another 5+ years then, and doesn't much like the idea of you gaining independence, earning your own money and having friends outside the family home.

He doesn't get to use you as an incubator for his 4th child. It is entirely your choice whether you decide to grow another human inside your body or not, and if you don't want to then fine. If he tries to insist, not fine.

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