If you met your child when you were a child would you think they were posh?

[GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf]

I definitely would, but I thought anyone who didn’t have to share a room with a sibling was posh. If you lived in a detached house you were basically part of the royal family as far as I was concerned. DH said he would think they were a bit posh because they get to do after school clubs and extra curriculars and he never got that.

Second question: at their age, would you have been pals with them. DD6 asked me this morning if we would have played together at school, and I said yes of course we would have. But really our paths would never have crossed and if they did I would have thought she was a square because I was really naughty at her age. From 6-9 I was just a terror for no good reason. She definitely would have told the teacher on me (as she should). Also I can’t lie, I would discourage DD from playing with a kid who behaved how I did.

DS5 I probably would have played with because he likes cars and messy play and at that age I loved going in the water tray ect. DD2 is 11 months so not really at that stage yet.

No! I grew up in a big old house with stables and an orchard and loads of animals.
My daughter is growing up on a council estate. My circumstances are very much reduced, as it were.

No I wouldn't have though they were 'posh' but to be honest, I really didn't think that way as a child anyway.

My friends were just my friends.

Some had more and some had less, much the same as now 🤷‍♂️

No, but my husband would! I think I would have been best friends with my kids. My eldest is extremely similar to me.

Yes!

I grew up on a council estate and played in empty garages with drug needles lying around....

I now live in a tiny house but in a nice affluent area. My eldest DD in particular sounds really posh when she speaks. Me and DP do not (our families have commented on DDs posh accent)

My children have a far more privileged childhood than mine and my husband's. I would have been aware that they were in a much better financial position, but "posh" not so much and that wouldn't have stopped us being friends but I went to a very mixed economic school in that it was the only large school in the area and private schools weren't a thing.

I grew up in a small home, we felt like we had everything we wanted but in reality money was tight. Clothes on special occasions, no real paid extracurriculars, meals were simple, things like hummous, avocado, berries were unheard of.
My DC are growing up in a large house, more holidays, are exposed to a wide range of foods, love things like olives and sushi and things I hadn’t tried until my 20s, they can go to any clubs they want and overall are the definition of posh through my childhood eyes!

DH says our kids sound posh but to me they just sound Glaswegian I can’t lie. He says they’ve got the “Glasgow uni accent” and I will say the defiantly sound different to him but to me posh Scottish is the Edinburgh accent … apparently I’m very wrong though I guess it’s just the untrained ear

Yes, definitely but only once I’d got to know about schooling, houses, hobbies etc because she has a very broad regional accent, not a hint of RP despite my best efforts 🤣 We’d defo be friends.
Kids at school thought I was posh though because we lived in a detached house, had a car and my parents were still together(!) so it was a low starting base!

Definitely - I can recall eating out in a restaurant once, we never took holidays abroad, I had one pair of trainers for 'out to play' and we never had sky tv.

My kids have a favourite steak restaurant abroad but like to compare it to others in their search for the best chateaubriand 🙈

It’s funny because we grew up in a relatively poor town: both my parents were teachers and we had a car and a phone when lots of my friends didn’t. I always felt like we were sort of rich. I now know we weren’t at all. My parents had a huge mortgage and five children.

My children grew up in a wealthy area and felt not rich compared to sone of their friends whose parents owned businesses even though we had two cars and went on foreign holidays etc (which my parents never did)

It always strikes me as quite odd, how relative these things are. It slightly worries me that my children sometimes feel “less privileged” just because of that completely nonobjective comparison with people around them.

No. My kids did go to private school but they are very down to earth. No skiing holidays every winter or exotic island in the summer and expensive homes. We did in fact live in a big detached house with a pool during a good part of their childhood, but the price of that would not buy more than a one bedroom flat where I live in London now so it’s relative. And rich doesn’t equal posh for me anyway.
As for being friends? Yes with my DD as we have similar temperament and some shared interests. My son - I’d think he was one of those gobby slightly hyper kids always messing around in class, so no, I’d think he was cute but we wouldn’t be friends and he’d barely even know I existed. Money doesn’t really seem to come in to it - some of my kids’ friends were quite wealthy, some not. I wouldn’t call any of them ‘posh’ though.

No. When I was growing up practically everyone I knew lived in a 3 bed semi and went to the local school. I couldn’t get my head round all the books I read where they had secret passages in their homes, owned an island and went to boarding school. My own DC, like me, also grew up in a 3 bed semi and went to the local school .

My child is/was better travelled than I was though as we never went abroad as a child (and nor did most people I knew) whereas we normally go abroad at least once a year. Then again, with the advent of cheap flights, perhaps our holidays with DC to the Italian Lakes are just the equivalent of my family holidays to the English Lake District in the ‘70s.

Also, we have always taken our DC out to eat frequently, whereas it just wasn’t a ‘thing’ when I was growing up. And of course there’s technology. Yes big changes from the 70s to the 2000s but also it’s something my DH prioritises whereas my own parents were quite late adopters of anything.

Yes I would have. Anyone who lived in a house their parents owned and was not a council house seemed posh to me. My mum bought our council house while I was growing up so while we did own it at a stage it was still pre council.

our detached house would have seemed big and posh, and they’ve always had lots of ‘things’ that they want and done clubs.

I never felt poor or like I missed out or was hard done by. But my mum was a single parent for a long time with 3 kids and couldn’t afford lots of luxuries.

so yes I think I would have.

It is weird how kids see things. I remember I had a mate who was an only child and her parents were pretty well off, still together. I loved going to her house because she had amazing toys! She always said how she was jealous of me sharing a room with my sister and it must be like a sleep over every night… 😂

I wouldn’t have thought DS was posh, but I would think he was slightly better off than me, but most people were as I grew up on a council estate in a very middle class suburb. I would be impressed with all his gadgets but size of house is pretty much the same. If we could get past the male/female divide DS and I would be good friends as we have a very similar sense of humour and laugh a lot together.

Yes. I grew up in a 2 bed top-floor flat in S London. No car. No foreign holidays.

DCs grew up in a 3-storey Victorian house in a small market town, 2 cars (3 once!) and holidays every year.

Yes, I'd have thought my children are well posh. My parents didn't learn to drive until I was about 12, we shared bedrooms, had UK holiday park holidays and didn't have the extra curricular things DC have. I was seen as slightly posh among many school friends though probably because I spoke nicely and lived in a nicer part of town with stable parents, it's funny how its all relative really. I like to think that DC and I would have got on though, we are/were all quite similar I think, although they are both less serious than I was which is no bad thing!

Yes definitely. My children are growing up with far more material means than I did (and I had a lovely childhood). They do loads of extra curricular stuff and we have 2 smart cars (we had old bangers when I was a kid). They've also been abroad loads including skiing every year - I first went abroad in high school on a French exchange.

We are also Scottish and my children have a very English accent, especially my middle one.

Yes. I would probably be in awe of them as well, so a bit afraid to approach them. Although I think I would be on the outskirts of their group of friends - probably the quiet one!

I don't think being posh is only about money. I had a friend whose parents had considerably more money and a bigger house than me, but they weren't posh!

when did your mum tell you she rented her house? Can’t remember when mine did but I thought I was rich because my mum kept the house clean even though she rented it from the council I thought we were rich. I only had two friends growing up and their parents were filthy I thought they were poor based on this even though one owned their house and the other also rented from the council.

My friends thought I was posh based on the cleanliness of my house plus my mum liked vases and made my friend cry because she had permanent lice and kept giving them to me

Yes I’d have thought she was quite posh and definitely tamer than I was age her age (14). Her friend group is all very sensible and she has very strong views (atm) on things like alcohol, smoking and vaping.

I was often called posh when I was a kid, even though I lived in a tiny house with only six rooms (total, not bedrooms) and didn't have much money. But I was well spoken and went to a very rough primary school

Oh yes! Me- NE accent, dirty and neglected living conditions, very few clothes, paid for driving lessons myself. My children- Sussex accent, tennis lessons, skiing holidays, lovely big house, driving lessons and first car bought. I would never have dreamed of this as a child and I’d have considered my children posh and privileged.

Probably - my kids come out with the most smug and insufferable things, but I know they hear it from me and I obviously have ideas above my own station - we are definitely not posh, I am just annoying!

Things I have heard from them recently DS5 and DD4

"no mummy, I don't fancy going to a chain" - when told we were popping to Costa
"is this sourdough" a supermarket kids meal sandwich, err no soz
"ooh mummy I love Manchego" - a snack plate at playgroup, it was not Manchego
"is this real theatre mummy, or just panto" - seeing the Gruffalo on stage

They remind me to keep my mouth shut because they are always listening and always repeating and humbling me!