If you have young children, what time do you go to bed?

[PlumBear]

Asking because we have a 7, 5 and 2 year old and are utterly broken with exhaustion.
Having dropped her nap the 2 year is asleep by 7pm, thank God, but the older 2 can still be awake at 8.30pm / 9pm. Then up around 6.30am the next day.

by the time they’re all asleep and we’ve tidied up downstairs, all my husband and I want to do is sit in silence on our phones for a few hours and decompress. Family life is incredibly noisy and chaotic at the moment and have no family nearby to help.
so we usually end up going to bed around 11pm. I know this is too late, especially as the toddler is still up once or twice in the night and can wake as early as 5am but I also know we desperately need some time to ourselves at the end of the day. We are really struggling at the moment.

how do you balance it? And what time do you go to bed if you have children of a similar age?

TIA

Well, that cheered me up - I was very jealous tbh 😂

Too late for your older kids.

They need to be in bed at 7pm.

Why would i lie? I have good sleepers

I take them out on the days theyre not at nursery/childminders

Well apparently im lying 😂 why would i lie.

I’ve got 2, 4 and 1. 4 year old has just started sleeping through 4 nights a week or so. I do all night wakes with both, as 4 year old won’t let dad do it 🥴

He goes to bed at 7:30ish, asleep for 8. He usually wakes between 6 and 7am. DH often does baby at the same time, and she wakes for the first time at 10pm.

I go to bed at around 9:30 most nights at the moment, so I’m there when she wakes… it does often feel I don’t get much of an evening. I feel worse if I go to bed later, although I also have to try hard to resist the urge to mindlessly scroll!

To be fair your past posts are littered with contradictions.

I guess for most people, they’re up and out again by 8am… so that’s probably 8 hours of sleep maximum overnight for the kids, and that’s not enough for most kids, it’s under the minimum sleep recommendations even for low sleep needs kids.

We time work so someone does pick up at 5pm and we eat quickly afterwards. Friends use slow cookers or batch cooking, one has a food delivery service.

I did used to struggle with this idea that everyone here is in and closed up so early, our park is always deserted by 6pm, but it’s how society is set up here. We spend half the year in Spain and timelines work differently there - DS is often playing in a park at 9pm there, but he doesn’t have to be at preschool until 10am and he finishes at 2 for a long nap, so he does get the same sleep in total, just spaced out differently.

I used to be in bed at about 21:00 when the children were small. No way would I have stayed up until 23:00!

Hardly. Im a single parent. Not going to take anyones shit on here

If I put my 6 year old to. bed at 7, they'd be up 5am! That doesn't work for all kids, sleep can differ.

I’m not sure I agree with this. My kids are asleep by 8:15, they are up at 7:15 - that is 11 hours of sleep not 8. On the odd day they mess around and it’s 8:30pm they sleep in till 7:30am. However, it takes 10 minutes to get them dressed, 10 to get breakfasted and teeth, 25 minutes each to shower or whatever- we’re out the door no problem by 8:15am. If one of us has an early start the other parent sorts the kids. However, an earlier bedtime would mean one or both of us would not see them in the evening and hear about their days over dinner. I much prefer Spanish time.

I mean 10 hours for an adult (although sounds amazing) seems far too much when they are other things you could do with your time and get up at 7am but then I’m not a morning person so is probably impossible for early birds waking at 5 or 6. 8 which I’m about to have now is perfectly fine.

i guess the thing is ultimately bedtimes are subjective to your family life and work

5pm? We’re both just leaving work then? What time do you eat?
I have a 4 year old who goes to bed at 7 and a 6 year old who goes at 7:30.
i have no me time though as I also have 16, 17 and 18 year olds 🤦🏼‍♀️ I go to bed before them 😂

Usually midnight and then I’m up at 6.30am. It’s not enough sleep but my eldest is almost 9 now and has a lot of trouble sleeping. She’s often awake til almost 10pm (I know, I’ve tried everything, and she’s still up by 6am, she just doesn’t need much sleep and never has) and I absolutely need time when nobody ‘needs’ me before I can settle

DD who’s almost 3 is bath, hair wash and dried and in bed for a story at 6:15 on the days she has nursery. Lights out at 6:30, sleeps through until 7. Weekends and non nursery days, in bed for 7, read a book and have a cuddle, lights out and she’s up between 7:30-8.

DS is 6 months and nothing like DD was, at his age DD was having an 8oz bottle at 7:30 then slept until 7am so before DS came along, DH and I would stay up until sometime between 10-12 depending on if we were binge watching a series or into a book on our kindles. DS has a bottle at 7:30, goes into cot awake, sleeps then needs another bottle around midnight which I dream feed to him in his cot otherwise he’s awake at 3/4 screaming for one. If I feed him at midnight he’ll go through until 6:30. I normally collapse into bed after that but really miss reading my kindle etc. I’m just too tired.

But I could have written your post, by time kids are in bed, toys are put away, bottles sterilised, clothes for nursery are hung up and ready to go for the morning, any washing up done, have a bath or shower myself it’s already 9pm then I usually have some washing to put on the airer or tumble dryer.

i love my kids with my whole heart but it’s true that having 1 is like having 1 and having 2 is like having 20 😂

Just in bed now 😂 Kids (5 and nearly 2) are in bed and asleep by 8pm. We then clean the kitchen and do laundry/ironing etc then relax and do hobbies/tv/music til 10.30. We get up at 6.45 to get ready for work and get the kids up at 7 for school and childminder. It’s not as much sleep as I’d like but also I need all those hours of hobby time 😅

I’m a SAHM as baby is 6 months old. 2 days a week when DD isn’t at nursery, she does ballet one day snd I take her to a soft play or similar the other day. She’s only in nursery 9-3 so when we get home, we do colouring together or stickers or crafts, dinner at 5pm, bath 5:30. I eat with my Husband around 7:30. We run our own business, he usually gets home around the time our DD goes to bed. He makes the most out of the weekends, we go to the local national trust sites, farms etc we spend lots of time with our kids and all eat together on Saturdays and Sundays.

That's exactly how we're living too. Kids involved bed about 8.30/9pm. We're up till 11/12. I used to go straight to sleep when they were younger. They're 2 and 4 now and I need that time to chill. I dont think 11 is particularly late for an adult to go to sleep though, everyone i know used to laugh at me going to sleep at 9!

Why would a child going to bed at 7pm mean people don't do anything with their kids? Some of us didn't choose jobs that meant we only got an hour a night with ours. What a ridiculous question. My kids have their swimming lessons in the day time.