Why would school refuse a call and insist on a meeting

[Insistingonit]

My dd is in year 5. Attendance hasn’t been good due to frequent illness. Once she got to 90% the school insisted on a GP appt to verify Illness each time which we did. We already supply the appt letters for appts in school time.

She is now at 88% . We have continued to provide proof of illness. They are insisting on speaking to us we agreed and said we will arrange a phone or video call. They said it has to be in person. Why? We are happy to discuss but don’t see the difference?

Actually I agree ask the school why your child is constantly catching things there perhaps they should have a word with their cleaning staff? I remember joking that i had to worm my child like a cat (sen and always stuffs things in his mouth so picked them up really easy) the following week it was announced that they were deep cleaning over half term so everyone needed to take home their PE kits it was nice of them to try (never did clear them completely though)

If they want to meet her face to face then there is a reason. Why are you so gung ho on supporting a non face to face meeting

because the OP literally asked why the school would refuse one and insist on face to face.. and i'm explaining that actually, they have no reason to under the guidance that has been active since 2024.. and she has every right to push back.

I see no sense whatsoever in pushing back and there have been far far far soo many children let down by all systems that are supposed to protect them.

I understand the OP is providing what seems to be excessive evidence. The way to deal with that is to go to the requested meeting at school and make that point, not to write to the local paper. Still, local papers are desperate for stories. 'Local mum pushes back over GP sick notes'. Thrilling.

because it is a pointless meeting. The kid is sick, as evidenced by medical evidence the OP provided that the school has ZERO grounds to ask for in the first place.

Nothing the OP can do can improve her attendance,

What will a f2f meeting achieve? other than go over a conversation that could be had over the phone, rather than wasting hours of the OP's day that she can't afford to spend away from her job?

Why are YOU so insistent she miss work and attend a pointless meeting?

Why are you so gung ho on defending the school?

Yes but saying I think you need to work on your hygiene is just rude

They may want you to sign an attendance plan or it may be to see if you are in need of any further support. Childhood illnesses are common in Reception but you just need to say you are doing everything you can to improve attendance.

And so many families unnecessarily stressed and harassed by schools who care more about attendance figures than actually supporting children's education and wellbeing.
They go after families with genuine absences and cause unmeasurable stress.

They overstep the law and expect parents to provide it attend meetings they have no right to ask for. While children who are actually at risk get ignored by the safeguarding policies and policies that should actually protect them.

But it's easier to harass us than it is to stand up for children who are actually at risk

Yes because GPs are always right aren’t they….. no GPs involved in any of the child deaths from neglect and abuse… oh wait. Sorry. There were. In every instance. Not being funny but if I thought the school had a safeguarding concern over my child, I would be jumping through hoops if I had nothing to hide, not arguing the toss over a FTF meeting

Why are you so reluctant to have a face to face meeting?

That’s a huge red flag…

As a single mother of three kids paying a mortgage and childcare costs on her own (with zero benefit help), who already had to take unpaid time off work to care for my son during and post surgery, and the schools complete refusal to offer me a meeting time that fitted around me already being at the school I.e. morning drop-off, overlooking the fact my other 2 children who attended the same school had 100% attendance, igniring the fact that my children were academically excelling and were always clean, tidy and well fed, and rigidly insisting on a time that meant I had to take more unpaid time off work that equalled the budget of my weekly groceries, you're damn straight i refused.

No idea if they referred me to social services because I never heard from them, could possibly be because there was clearly zero safeguarding issue warranting social services involvement!

Honestly, I think some of the posters live very different lives to not understand how devastating the financial impact of missing even half a day of work can be, especially following unpaid leave caring for a poorly child and attending medical appointment. Every penny is budgeted and accounted for, with little to no wiggle room. And that doesn't for one second mean their child isnt a priority.

Not having enough money to feed my kids is a safeguarding issue. Losing my job and not being able to keep a roof over our heads is a safeguarding issue. Sending my kid into school unwell for the sake of attendance stats and his appendix bursting in class is a safeguarding issues.

Not being available for an awkwardly timed meeting is not a safeguarding issue. Bending over backwards to provide medical proof of absence is not a safeguarding issue. Asking for a meeting to be at a time I'm already at the school or via the phone/ video call to minimise the financial impact at a time when things are already tight is nkt a safeguarding issues. Nor is it being difficult or confrontational. Nor is attending a face to face meeting going to magically improve his attendance stats by miraculously preventing him catching unavoidable illnesses in the future.

Exactly.

It is a tick box exercise for the school and a waste of time for OP, not to mention putting her job at risk which won't be good for her child.

How do you know they don’t think this child is at risk?

I agree. OP seems remarkably defensive. Obviously an in-person meeting is different. As others have said, you can't smell alcohol or cannabis over Zoom and it's much harder to read body language or to see if anything is happening 'off-screen'. But she won't hear it, and really doesn't want to go in. I'm not surprised the school's antennae are up.

You can smell it at drop off and pick up.

The child is in school when well enough. When to ill for school she has seen the GP. So has been seen
If they have safeguarding concerns they should follow the safeguarding policy and make referrals as necessary.
I'm not being funny but a parent attending a meeting does not prove the child isn't at risk any more than a parent refusing to attend an meeting at an inconvenient time proves abuse. Especially as parent has offered to attend meeting after work hours or online

Maybe they think a child's safety demands more than a 10-second glance-and-sniff. I do.

So a online meeting while at work suggests the OP is drunk or high in work. It's amazing all these workplaces not batting an eye at their staff being drunk and high on drugs.
What mints is OP using that the smell of alcohol and cannabis is no longer able to be smelt at school.pick up time

They clearly are following their safeguarding policy. Have a lovely Sunday

No it’s not, she’s explained that she missed work and does not understand why the discussion can’t be over the phone. What could she try to hide from not having a face to face? Her daughters been back at school

But not concerned enough to have the meeting after school pick up

Their policy doesn't trump law

Sometimes the reason is that if it causes enough hassle for the parents, they might think twice about keeping their kid off next time.