Anyone else have a neighbour that monitors everyone?

[Popcorntimewatchingdrama]

So, we finally moved into the new estate have been there for a year. Everyone’s settling in, the vibes are great, and life is pretty mundane… except for our self-appointed “Sheriff of the Estate”. She’s always been pretty active on the WA group, god forbid a bin isn’t emptied on time or something or a dog wees on a lamppost nothing to do with us. We try to live and let live but be really respectful of others.

Apparently, we have a neighbour who has decided—unprompted and unpaid—to be the CEO of her own Neighbour Watch. She’s out there recording cinematic masterpieces of everyone arriving and leaving the estate, we’ve only just found this out.

Things hit a fever pitch this week while we were (thankfully) away. Now, keep in mind: we all have massive drives (2–3 cars easily), wide roads, and plenty of visitor bays. But someone dared to park on the street opposite our house for—wait for it—3 hours and 16 minutes. Absolutely nothing to do with us- our adult and quiet children said our drive wasn’t blocked or hers or anything.

Cue the frantic texts to us. She sent us the “surveillance footage,” mentioned she knew we were on holiday because she watched us pack our rucksacks on Saturday morning (not creepy at all!), and demanded to know whose car it was and exactly when we’d be back.

My husband, bless him, replied: “Not our car. or anything to do with us or our family. Was it blocking you?”
Her response? “No, but I need to know who it belongs to because I’m doing Neighbor Watch for everyone!” 🫡 (News to us... we never signed up for the Premium Stalker Package).
When he asked why it mattered how long we were away & if the house was fine, she hit us with the fact she keeps logs of people coming and going for ‘security’. We have a zero crime rate locally as far as I can see. DH seems to think it might be illegal to record people arriving and leaving their homes / her house the first one into the estate so you have to drive by hers. We are next.

She then took her investigation to the local WhatsApp group, and let’s just say the neighbours haven’t received it well. It’s currently a digital riot of “How dare you film us?” and “This is actual stalking.” 🍿it has properly kicked off and I can see why. We haven’t replied or got involved.

We’re just sitting here on holiday, rucksacks and all, watching the drama unfold from a safe distance we are a 5 hour flight away. Does anyone else have a neighbour who thinks they’re the lead character in CSI: The new estate or is it just us? 😂

We don’t dislike them but I’m sure as hell not telling them my movements or where I am / be back. In an emergency yes but it’s not.

We have a bin monitor. Painted house number on our bin when we were on holiday. Sends me texts to remind of bin day and also to take my washing in as it’s going to rain. I don’t mind it, bless her.

Rude.

Good side 0 crime rate. The police even commented its the place where "nothing happens". Allegadely.

I'm not certain about the zero crime rate, to be honest. A lot of this is already borderline stalking behaviour, and could easily escalate into crime if unchecked.

We had a neighbour exactly like this, If he heard anyone chatting outside, he'd be out at his door "Trying to get a mobile phone signal". If anyone had workmen at their house, he'd go out and try to start chatting to them about what work they were doing and complaining that they were parking their vans or leaving materials near his house.
When a new family moved in he introduced himself as The Mayor of the neighbourhood. He was just a nosey old git. He and his wife eventually fell out with everyone and left.

No doubt they're doing exactly the same wherever they are now,

😂she sounds invested anyway.

The closest we had was when we lived in an estate next doors DD who was about 7 constantly monitored our comings/ goings. She stopped me on day going back into my house to ask 'that's the 3rd time you've left the house today, you don't go for long where are you going' 😂

I've never used ChatGPT myself, as I'm a human and I prefer interacting with other humans without using an artificial intermediary (I appreciate that some people with disabilities use tech to help them communicate, but even then, it's usually the tech that conveys their message and doesn't just take over what the message is).

However, from reading this thread, I know two absolutely unequivocal facts:

1. The thread definitely was started by ChatGPT, because the OP has all of the telltale grammatical hallmarks;
2. The thread definitely wasn't started by ChatGPT, as it would have made it much more succinct and thus lots shorter.

What a time to be alive!

Nothing to add OP but "premium stalker package" and "rucksack and all" made me laugh out loud in public 😁

I think she sounds quite bored and lonely so I feel a bit sorry for her. I’d be glad of her monitoring and surveillance if anything actually did happen, but videoing things does sound too much and I’m not surprised neighbours are annoyed. As long as it stays harmless I would enjoy her quizzing people about mundane goings on. There is no sense of community where I live and no WA groups so I’d be flattered if anyone noticed me leaving the house 😂

people were leaving piles of dog shit (in bags) next to the bin which was sealed. Well, they should be persued to the gates of hell.

Sometimes nosey neighbours can be useful for keeping an eye on things but the determined busy body type is annoying. I'm not curtain twitching as I have a life of sorts but I do sometimes wonder who that is parked outside as never seen them before.... argh, I'm turning into one of them! However, it's a passing thought I don't march outside and accost them. There's mild curiosity, there's anxious neighbourhood watching and there's batshit control freak interference.

Every neighbourhood has one of these @Popcorntimewatchingdrama

We have one in our road. A man who is retired, and is the self appointed guardian of the village. He badgers, and goes on at people for anything he sees as 'not quite right' or a bit 'unsuitable,' eg; the bin still out on the public pavement 24 hours after it was emptied, or a lawn not mowed for 3-4 weeks. And he LOVES to moan about children being a bit loud, or cycling anywhere near his property!

He is so bloody nosey, and deeply annoying. I avoid him whenever possible, as he also thinks he is charming and funny, and always has something 'hilarious' to say, or some stupid, (often sexist) comment.

He is always 'gobsmacked' to see me in the garden in the spring and summer, doing the gardening, weeding planting, cutting etc... 'oh dear me, that's mans work isn't it?' he says. (And he says at least once or twice every summer.) 🙄 Last time he said something, I think it was 'oooh, a woman doing the gardening?!' I said 'oh yes indeed. In fact this will blow your mind even more, my husband is cooking dinner!' He just had this face >>> .... and walked off.

Twat. 😆

I love your op, op. I'll never know what's real or not, but I think it would be a shame if all good creative writing for fun became derided as "AI" .

Yeah I am not seeing the OP's first post as AI at all.

drsg Some mis matched chairs onto the fronts in the summer drinking a can of Stella and see what happens 😆

We have a mild one on our cul de sac. We had a tradespersons van parked on our drive so I parked my car opposite his house (we are all detached) not blocking him getting out, not directly opposite his large drive. He came round in the afternoon to say he had noted the tradesperson had left some time ago but I had not moved my car back onto my drive and consequently I'd blocked him in. My suggestion that said more about his lack of driving ability than my car being parked inconsiderately did not go down well, he started banging on and I just walked away.

He does not speak to me or my husband which is a terrific result as he pounces on all of the neighbours and talks at them for ages, you can see their body language just screaming shut up. He is funny though, he sweeps the leaves along the road but stops short when he gets to the road opposite our house - leaves being leaves they just blow into the bit he has cleared. He also moves everyone's bins back apart from ours. When the bin lorry comes he watches it to make sure I assume it's driving properly. He and his wife pick leaves up by hand in their garden.

@RaraRachael yes he sounds like our old neighbour! The funny thing was his wife was so nice, she was always really friendly and didn't get involved with his nosiness. They didn't seem to get on all that well!

My parents nicknamed the man at the end of the Cul-de-Sac I grew up in (in the 1980's) 'The Gatekeeper.'

So, these people have always been around but unfortunately they are now armed with Ring Doorbells and WhatsApp groups to post their 'suspicions' in.

A woman I had never met approached me a while ago to have a go at me for parking my (very small) car outside her house for 2 hours. I realised halfway through our conversation that she had a iPad in her hands. I guess she was filming me. Weirdo.

God it’s so boring where I live, no WhatsApp group, no one watching as far as I know. Or maybe I’m just not included in the group 🤔

Love this. Please do it @Popcorntimewatchingdrama

Why? Why does OP need that? Perfectly good English, no need for digital involvement. Get a grip.

If it was too long for you why bother reading it ? Or have you recognised yourself as the nosy neighbour?🤔

Our opposite neighbour is a Gossip. He knows everything about everyone... I always wondered how he found stuff out.

Turns out, he just asks direct questions "what did you end up selling your house for, then?" And "how much was your new kitchen?". Loads of people are daft enough just to tell him - I guess he asks like it's nothing, so they answer without thinking. It's amazing to watch him in action. Luckily he's a nice guy.

I thought the length was just right 👍🏻

Its not my mum is it?! 😄 She wouldn't know how to record everyone but she certainly knows everything about the comings and going of everyone in her road, helped by her kitchen being at the front of the house. No-one needs a ring doorbell there.

It sounds like the neighbourhood watch warrior is not being well received by others on the WA chat so hopefully they'll dial down their actions.

I'm intrigued to know where you've gone 5 hours away with rucksacks. 😊 Sounds like an exciting adventure.

Also happy to hear there are new build estates being built these days with enough parking for 3 cars.

I'm afraid I own one. She does it all the time.

Yes I have one of these - thinks he owns the close because he moved in first

Murder over Bins, Parking, Political Stickers and the like.

utter twat

everyone else just minds their own business