Children dla

[Mummy621]

Hi, just looking for advice or anyone who’s in the same situation, wouldn’t 3 year old be eligible for dla he isn’t potty trained at all he suffers constipation and is on two types of medication for it pediatrics have said they can see him when he’s 4, he does alot of stuff which makes me think he has adhd or autism, lines things up constantly, only eats certain foods, has to have his toys a certain way, can’t handle emotions at all, several outburst a day, takes 30-60 mins to calm him down, he can’t be left unattended at all because he puts anything in his mouth, have to sit with him every night until he’s fully asleep, wakes several times in the night meaning I have to sit with him again, can’t dress or undress himself with any clothing ect there is a lot I could write here but does anyone think it’s worth applying? He does attend nursery for 3 hours a day but they say they can see es moody at times a little upset at times and puts things in his mouth but they didn’t help at all with my other son who attended the primary school so he didn’t get a diagnosis until he was 13! So I don’t really want to write them in the form or involve them is that allowed?

He sounds very similar to my son who gets middle rate DLA (largely for toilet/continence issues) but he's 8 - DLA is about the additional care that your child needs in comparison to a "typical" child of the same age, so you may struggle as it's not that unusual for a 3 year old to not be potty trained, struggle with sleep/emotional regulation etc. But if you can clearly show how their needs are more than another 3 year old, and evidence that, there's certainly no harm in applying. I put it off for years as i wasn't sure my son's situation was "bad enough" and now regret not applying sooner!

My 9 year old is incontinent and on meds for it he’s gets dla, the 3 year old will be 4 in July, believe me I’ve tried to potty trained but he can’t feel the wee like at all, he struggles with change, loud noises and stuff I know in my heart there’s something there just like I did with my 15 year old I had literally no professionals help with my 15 year old I felt nobody listened to me at all it was really disheartening but I got there in the end now he’s in a special education setting on mediation and has an ehcp, I feel as a parent you just know if that makes sense x

My dd didn’t potty train until 3.5-4 years, and at 5 still struggles a bit. She is on the pathway for ASD and ADHD, but amongst others at nursery and school who are NT it isn’t that uncommon at that age, and she’s not the only one who has some issues at school either. I think at age 3 he wouldn’t come across as higher needs than others for the potty training. In a years time he might though.

He's 3 - lots of children aren't potty trained at that age, all children need a lot of attention, that's a normal parenting job. Maybe go out to work rather than expecting the state to parent for you,

He’s only 3 it’s not unusual at that age to be struggling with potty training. Two of mine were very late with their toilet training, it took huge amounts of patience, one was also on medication for constipation. It was a difficult time with a lot of washing. I went to GP but they only take toilet issues seriously from age 7. By then they were ok. ERIC was a great source of advice.

I would not have considered applying for DLA!

Wow honestly just wow you don’t know anything about my life or if I work or not, clearly don’t know children if this is how you react to a post, shame on you!

You can’t refer a child to continence service in my trust until 5 …..it’s not considered an issue until then….you won’t get DLA for toileting issues at 3

Bir harsh. How do you know she doesn't work? Isn't disabled herself? Or on mat leave? Maybe ask a few questions before being so accusatory!

The main thing for DLA is what are you having to provide help with that most children of his age wouldn't need help with.

• 40-60 mins to calm him down after a tantrum several times a day - unusual for a 3 old
• not reliably able to toilet himself - normal for a 3 year old
• putting everything in his mouth - unusual for a 3 year old
• wakes in the night - not sure to be honest
• can't dress - normal for a 3 year old

You are only likely to get DLA if your child cannot spend chunks of time unsupported that another child his age could. So I'd say with the toileting thing, yes he sounds a bit behind, but no-one is likely to be able to 100% guarantee that they can keep doing something else while their 3 is on the loo. The putting everything in his mouth is NOT normal by 3. I honestly would apply, the worst that could happen is they say no!

Thankyou 🥰 absolutely harsh I think x

Thankyou for your advice, I read he should be able to at least assist in getting dressed or undressed especially with lose clothing but he can’t at all, has no sense of danger at all, doesn’t like loud noises not even the hoover, can’t have good touching on a plate, honestly puts everything in his mouth and constantly has his hands in his mouth, been referred to ent for ongoing ear infections one so bad it burst his eardrum, can not calm down for at least 30 minutes when in distress ect x

I had a baby 7 months ago for the judgemental comments xx

You need medical evidence to claim DLA. You won't get to see a specialist until your DC is 6 or 7 for toileting issues. Until then you won't have medical evidence. Lots of DC still can't dress themselves at 4-5. My sister teaches primary reception and year 1 and she says some DC take ages and can't dress themselves after PE. You will need to wait until your DC is older and you have medical evidence. A parent stating their DC can't do something means nothing without medical evidence.

@Mummy621 When does your mat leave end? Can you try to put things in place now so it's easier down the line e.g when your little one goes to school?

So you have a 15yr old with special needs in some way, a 9yr old who is incontinent and in meds, now your 3yr old is displaying all these symptoms you say he is and you decided to have another baby…why though?! I would just be too tired to bring another responsibility on myself like that tbh!!

And that’s your personal choice as it was mine to have another child, your talking as though special needs children should put you off having any more children, I have more than enough time for all my children they’re all treated the same so tell me why judgemental people like you should even have the right to comment? I personally find your comment appalling

Next month lovely, was very poorly after birth almost died having a stroke due to high blood pressure, I’m trying to do everything I can for him now before he goes to big school 🥰

@Mummy621 Absolutely up to you. You must earn well between you - husband and I have one little girl and both work (neither high earners) but still not easy! If you can afford it - both financially and emotionally - then fair play.

The paediatrics team who see my 9 year old have agreed to take him at 4 which will be in July

Yeah tbh I don’t think the decision making process is the best there but that’s my opinion and im allowed to have that opinion…but yes tbh I fail to see how you have enough time for them and work. Most people would struggle tbf!

So you have all these symptoms answers
ans you’ve clearly been through all of this before so why are you asking?

If you must know I have my own business and so does my husband, I can either go physically to work or work from home, my kids are fantastic children and very academically bright and very much loved.

How do I have the symptoms and answers my 9 year old has only just been diagnosed with incontinence, I thought he was just struggling at night to go to the toilet but turn out he actually has a medical problem I didn’t just jump to dla straight away when he didn’t stop wetting the bed.

You do in my arse!!
Well going by your previous posts you left your ex just over a year ogo…met someone else, got pregnant straight away!? and had a baby (who is now 7months old!) and now he is dh…all with 5 kids already. With all due respect do you not think that it’s all a bit messy to say the least.

editing to add I hope you are a troll because your decision making is so bad I hope it’s not true!

I mean yes he sounds autistic but its not really much different to many other 3yo. And not costing you more at this stage.