Children dla

[Mummy621]

Hi, just looking for advice or anyone who’s in the same situation, wouldn’t 3 year old be eligible for dla he isn’t potty trained at all he suffers constipation and is on two types of medication for it pediatrics have said they can see him when he’s 4, he does alot of stuff which makes me think he has adhd or autism, lines things up constantly, only eats certain foods, has to have his toys a certain way, can’t handle emotions at all, several outburst a day, takes 30-60 mins to calm him down, he can’t be left unattended at all because he puts anything in his mouth, have to sit with him every night until he’s fully asleep, wakes several times in the night meaning I have to sit with him again, can’t dress or undress himself with any clothing ect there is a lot I could write here but does anyone think it’s worth applying? He does attend nursery for 3 hours a day but they say they can see es moody at times a little upset at times and puts things in his mouth but they didn’t help at all with my other son who attended the primary school so he didn’t get a diagnosis until he was 13! So I don’t really want to write them in the form or involve them is that allowed?

Is this true?

Going by previous posts apparently so…but I hope not tbh. Sounds like a fucking mess!

And we wonder why the country is broken.

I am now wondering if this is a goady post wanting all the MNers to get riled up about someone claiming DLA for a 3 year old not being toilet trained….

If it’s all true OP there could be a variety of reasons for your child’s behaviour, not just disability. The arrival of a new baby can cause lots of children to have emotional outbursts because they have lost some of mum’s attention and also feel they have lost their place as the baby of the family. If you were very unwell after birth this will be even more so as you will have been less available due to recovering from the birth.

Toilet regression is also common in toddlers when a new baby arrives.

Does it pleasure you making up stuff to post online?

And it’s not being a bitch it’s merely pointing out that if what you say is true then your dc have been through a lot! It’s telling it as it is.

I would consider the things he should be able to do assisted as things that don't qualify him for DLA at the moment. DLA is about whether someone has to assist him more than they normally would at his age. If you are beside him when he gets dressed to help with his trousers say, it doesn't really make much difference overall, if you also have to help with his pants for example.

I have to do it all for him, he physically can’t put any clothes on or take any off

Unless he was a very forward 3 year old, you wouldn't be sending him to his room alone to dress anyway. Therefore it makes little difference whether you are physically dressing him or not, you would be with him, focused on him anyway. No need for DLA because it's not taking time you would be using for other things if he were a typical three year old.

If he's at the same level when he's 5, and other parents would be sending their child to get dressed while they washed up or fed the baby, but you are still having to dress him, THEN he might qualify for DLA.

I have a DS with ASD who I receive DLA for (too many acronyms!). I think 3yo will probably be too young - we started receiving it I think when he was 5yo and the differences with regard to supervision and toileting were quite different to his peers. 3yo is still little and I think what you describe falls into the accepted developmental range.

takes 30-60 mins to calm him down this is the only bit of what you have posted that would stand out in a DLA assessment and by itself, it’s not enough because lots of three year olds are the same.

OP how are his motor skills generally? It sounds like you need to do additional work on his fine and gross motor skills. Not all children pick up dressing skills easily.

My DC struggled with motor skills and took a longer to develop those skills than their peers. So we’d have to practice things over and over again. He was in Velcro shoes for ages.

So things you could do for example chubby chalks on the patio or fat crayons on a giant piece of paper. Big paintbrush with a bucket on water on the patio. Toys that develop hand eye coordination like Duplo. Play dough is great for strengthening fingers. Climbing frames.

You could also speak to nursery or school about a referral to Occupational Health. We went to weekly sessions to practice motor skills, it really helped.

Obviously I have no idea if you have done any of this already.

My boys couldn’t dress themselves at 5 never mind 3….they have no disabilities and grew up to manage just fine…..many many 3 years old cannot dress or undress

My dd couldn’t dress herself at age 3, now at 5 she can but won’t. It really doesn’t sound like you have to do more for your DS than most 3 year olds need.