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Would you prefer to stay at a friend's house or a hotel?

76 replies

Firefly45 · 26/01/2026 18:23

Ive got an old friend who is in town for work and asked can she stay at ours.
She has plenty of money.

I really dont want her to stay. I dont like having visitors. Im embarrassed about state of our house. Ill have to do a massive clean/clear out of spare bedroom and tidy whole house on a weekday.
Im v happy to meet her but dont understand why anyone would want to stay in someone else's house if money isnt a factor.

I hate staying over at people's houses and would always choose a hotel if I could.

Is it just preference maybe?
DH thinks some people think its rude to stay in a hotel when they could stay with friends/relatives?

OP posts:
britneyisfreebutnotokay · 26/01/2026 18:24

Say no!! I’d only go to that effort if the person couldn’t afford to stay in elsewhere

CookingFatCat · 26/01/2026 18:27

Exactly the same, tiny house too. If it’s work hotel costs will be on expenses?

Beekman · 26/01/2026 18:28

I prefer a hotel rather than being in someone’s house. We have family to stay in our own house but friends opt for hotels and I am grateful for that.

cestlavielife · 26/01/2026 18:28

"Sorry we in middle of reorganising. Happy to meet you on tuesday evenong at your hotel or the pub" "

GoldenPineapple15 · 26/01/2026 18:29

I would much rather stay in a hotel and have my own space . I hate people staying overnight in my house.

LookingThroughGlass · 26/01/2026 18:30

Depends which friend and which hotel!

TheHoneyPot · 26/01/2026 18:30

Never understand people like this. Hotel is glorious, all your own space. I’d definitely want to meet up with a friend if I was in their area but no way would I be wanting to stay with them.

YourWinter · 26/01/2026 18:31

Hotel. I HATE using the loo at anyone else’s house.

ETS I don’t like sleeping in hotel beds, but I can’t relax and sleep well in someone’s house.

SophiaSW1 · 26/01/2026 18:31

Hotel

PhilosophicalCheeseSandwich · 26/01/2026 18:33

I didn't like stopping at people's houses, I can't relax and I'm well aware nobody prefers having house guests than not having them! I much prefer a hotel.

HindMost · 26/01/2026 18:33

Depends, I’ve got friends who’d be deeply offended if I said I was staying in a hotel rather than with them.

Beakthrough · 26/01/2026 18:34

Talk to her.

My mum would be offended if friends were in town and didn't stay with her. Maybe friend likes having guests and has assumed you feel the same.

luckylavender · 26/01/2026 18:34

I prefer a hotel & I hate overnight visitors

LupaMoonhowl · 26/01/2026 18:34

I always stay in a hotel. Took s while for my family to understand as they think it is a ‘waste of money’ but I relish the privacy.

gingercat02 · 26/01/2026 18:35

I would rather stay with a friend but if she's a friend she should know you don't like having guests and not have asked.
Just say sorry but no, it doesn't suit at the moment.

Wells37 · 26/01/2026 18:35

I would much rather stay in a hotel

CheddarCheeseAndCrispSandwich · 26/01/2026 18:37

Hotel…hands down! I’d absolutely hate staying in someone’s house if the option of a hotel was on the table. But I’m an antisocial introvert 🤷‍♀️😬

I would also say no to someone staying at mine…I have the space, and my house is lovely…but as I said, I’m an antisocial introvert 😂 I don’t even make excuses either…I just say no, sorry, I don’t have the bandwidth to deal with visitors.

Anonanonanonagain · 26/01/2026 18:38

'Sorry friend we are not in a position to have anyone stay but do let me know which hotel you book and maybe meet you there for a catch up meal '?

ooscal · 26/01/2026 18:38

Hotel every single time. I am made very welcome but I never feel "right" staying in someone else's home. They have their routine, commitments, obligations, family stuff and I don't have any!

I worry about waking the house up if I use the loo, I dribble on the pillowcases, so bring my own, then am asked why, are my (their) pillowcases dirty or what. I don't know what's the best time to get up, before or after them. I dislike chatting until late at night, maybe they do also. And so on. I just feel awkward.

I obviously have issues staying in another person's home, so therefore I don't. They are more than welcome in mine though, and stay once a year or so. I take them around and feed and water them. They don't like hotels it seems, because my house is free!

PartridgeInAPearTree123 · 26/01/2026 18:39

Hotel all the way for me, but I used to work with someone like your friend and she always used to find a random relative ( like her Mum's cousins son) or friend to stay with whenever she went somewhere to attend an event/ holiday. Plus she would take another friend with her! She wasnt short of money.I remember her telling me about staying overnight with one such random relative with a friend in tow while the poor things were packing ready to go on holiday abroad the next day. Who wants someone they don't know that well plus someone they don't know at all using there home as a free hotel while they're busy themselves. I'd tell your friend its not convenient and leave it at that.

CactusSwoonedEnding · 26/01/2026 18:39

If she's a friend she will be fine with you saying "no", because she cares about you and would not want to distress you.

If she's not fine with you saying "no" she's not a friend she's a CF user and you don't need her to like you any more so it's still ok to say "no"

I'm going to be nearby to a friend in a few weeks and have arranged to meet up and spend a few hours together. She asked if I would like to stay at hers (apologising that it would just be a sofabed) and I politely declined as I'd rather be in a hotel than having to deal with other people, however nice they are, either when I'm really tired at night or within 2 hrs of waking in the morning. I need my space and people-free time.

Most likely she's not a CF she's just naturally more people-positive than me. She envisions that you'll be up together till 1am drinking wine and talking about everything, and it will be easier to do that if all that needs to happen between that and sleep is slipping into PJs and cleaning her teeth, rather than getting her coat on and sitting in a taxi for a bit and checking in etc etc. But it's still ok to explain that it would be too much load on you to say "yes"

DappledThings · 26/01/2026 18:40

I'd rather stay with a friend. You get more time with them, it's part of the trip. I can't imagine gling to visit someone and staying somewhere else. Visiting friends for the weekend and hosting is a pretty normal regular thing for me.

mindutopia · 26/01/2026 18:41

I personally would much rather stay at a hotel, but we have the sort of house people are constantly asking to stay at (it’s big and in a desirable location and I suspect they like the level of catering I foolishly seem to provide 😂).

I myself have never asked to stay at anyone’s house ever! I’d always wait to be invited because that’s the polite thing to do. But it seems to be the done thing to try to book in like it’s an Airbnb in my personal experience. 🙄 It’s completely fine to say sorry, that doesn’t work for me. I often do.

Firefly45 · 26/01/2026 18:43

Ahh you are right! Didnt think of this! She is a late night wine drinker ..I am an early night tee totaler! Its this!! Argh

OP posts:
Furlane · 26/01/2026 18:46

I love having guests and all my friends have made me feel very welcome when I have stayed over. It’s nice to see some of them who I never usually get a chance to see as we live far away. I can see their children, have a lovely home cooked dinner, and then the kids go to bed and we catch up with a glass of wine. I usually bring chocolates and wine with me as a gift (or whatever I know they’ll like). I wouldn’t be offended though if they wanted to stay in a hotel or couldn’t put me up for whatever reason.

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