Why am I so overweight? Help me to understand

[PomegranateVase]

I’m 3.5 stone overweight (over the top end of the ideal weight to height guidelines), but would be around 5 stone over the lowest end of the guidelines, and I’m a size 16-18.

I cook from scratch using fresh ingredients everyday, including lots of vegetables and broths. We typically eat lots of healthy Japanese food that I cook from scratch at least 3 times a week, and only eat meat, chicken or fish around 3-4 times per week.

5 days a week I do a 20 minute brisk walk.
Twice a week I walk for 2 hours at moderate speed.
3-4 times per month I walk for around 3 hours at moderate speed (so around 9-12 hours walking - in addition to the above).

I drink 2 cups of coffee daily with a little milk and 1 sugar, as well as 3-4 cups of tea with 1 sugar. I also drink sugar free squash, and only very occasionally treat myself to a sugar free fizzy drink.

I drink 1 or 2 bottles of wine per week, eat one share size crisps packet to myself, and eat a few biscuits.

A typical weekday looks like this:
•Avocado on 1 slice of sourdough toast with a coffee
•1 Nature Valley snack bar and a coffee
•Baxter’s carrot and butter bean soup with 1 slice sourdough toast and butter
•A couple of biscuits
•Homemade Japanese vegetable, tofu and noodle soup.
•3-4 cups of tea and squash.

My best friend is a size 14 and it as overweight as me. She drives everywhere and never walks and doesn’t do any form of exercise. She eats lots of processed foods daily, also takes sugar in her hot drinks, drinks the same amount of alcohol as me and eats 1 large fry up breakfast every week.

Another friend is a size 10-12 and eats lots of pasta and processed foods, drinks about the same amount of alcohol as me and walks probably about the same amount as me.

My thyroid is functioning normally.

I fail to understand how I’ve become so overweight by leading this lifestyle.

Please can you give me any advice or tips on how I can lose weight as I feel my diet is quite healthy already.

Could something be wrong with me medically if I am this overweight?

Plus ultra processed foods alter the way the body’s metabolism works. I actually cannot believe people STILL believe it’s only the number of calories that matters.

We KNOW this stuff.

It’s like still saying the sun goes round the earth.

Plus the effect of excess sugar and insulin resistance.

what you eat does matter.

You can maintain your weight, eating your current diet.
To lose weight, just cut wine, bread, biscuits, crisps…

Usually the answer is that you’re consuming more calories than you think you are. Most people do. Cooking from scratch is great but if portions are large then calorie intake can still be higher than you need.

You could increase daily activity (not “exercise” like gym but just walking, talking the stairs instead of escalator/lift, etc), and reduce calories and see how that goes for a few months. Or there are the WLI, which seem to work a treat for most people.

'cuppa soup and slice of white bread for lunch'
That wouldn't register as a meal - it's about 200 empty calories.
Swap it for wholemeal toast with a poached egg (or salmon and salad) and you'd get more nutrition and you'd feel like you had eaten something.

I'll admit to the occasional cuppa soup but the ingredients list is scary.

For example:
Dried Glucose Syrup, Potato Starch, Salt, Palm Oil, Coconut Milk Powder (Coconut Extract, Maltodextrin, Emulsifier: Gum Arabic), Sunflower Oil, Whey Powder (Milk), Yeast Extract, Vegetables (Onion, Red Bell Pepper, Leek), Natural Flavourings, Chicken Meat (0.8%), Spices (Ginger, Cayenne Pepper, Paprika), Flavouring, Milk Protein, Chicken Fat (0.5%), Stabiliser: Potassium Phosphates, Coriander, Colours: Curcumin, Paprika Extract, Natural Lemongrass Flavouring (0.2%), Maltodextrin, Acidity Regulator: Sodium Citrates, Fortified Wheat Flour (Wheat Flour, Calcium Carbonate, Iron, Niacin, Thiamin), Antioxidant: Extracts of Rosemary, Celery

Exactly. I was quite clearly saying it’s not something I would recommend.

Glad you agree.

I haven’t had a cuppa soup in about two decades.

Try not to compare, I did this for years and it drove me crazy. This is your cross to bear and that's just the way it is.

Your diet doesn't sound too bad to me but I'm a similar size so obviously not the best judge. It's hard to give up your small pleasures when you are doing so much right otherwise. I sympathise. Your portions may also be big, a large healthy meal obviously has more calories than a medium portion of the same. Tracking with an app while doing exactly what you are doing for a few weeks would be the best start then see what you can cut out. It could be biscuits on some days only and less carbs at dinner on days you drink wine, that sort of thing. It doesn't have to be too restrictive if you are looking at long term and slow steady loss.

I think if you ate more protein- especially at breakfast then you would snack less.

So instead of toast and avocado have something like Greek yogurt, fruits and nuts/seeds. Agree all calories are not equal and you want something filling and nutritious.

Eat more for your lunch - white bread and a cuppa soup is not healthy and not enough. Again try and get some protein in and fill up with veggies.

No sugar in tea and coffee. Cut down wine. No biscuits.

How old are you? If you are perimenopausal it all gets a lot harder for to hormonal changes.

Weight training would help but diet is more impactful.

Walking great but you need to do
lots of it. A walk after your evening meal is a good idea.

https://www.health.harvard.edu/nutrition/how-ultra-processed-foods-are-made-linked-to-weight-gain

Yep! An increasing amount of evidence does suggest this and anecdotally I have noticed this in myself.

One month on holiday I just ate loads of freshly cooked Thai food made with whole food ingredients and didn't touch UPFs (no sweets, chocolate, ready meals, frozen pizza etc). I ate 3 meals a day and lived on pad Thai, fried rice, homemade smoothies and banana pancakes and fruit. I lost half a stone. Finally had a flat stomach and didn’t have to starve myself to get it!

When I came back to the UK I started back on the UPFs and that weight started coming back on around the middle, despite the fact I was probably consuming a similar amount of calories.

I also really hate the kind of tone and judgement people have around conversations of weight. So much fear, projection and self loathing seems to come out.

I am a healthy eater, always have been and I've never been a drinker or into junk or processed food but also tended to gain weight easily compared to my peers even when I was young. Living with other women as a student and in my early 20's taught me a lot. Some were much taller than me (I'm 5.5) Some really didn't eat much at all, some ate more than me but had all this nervous energy and were never sitting still while I tend to be quite still at rest.

What I'm trying to say is that we are all different and we need to just find our own place where we are comfortable and healthy. In my case I worked more on strength training to increase my base metabolic rate as well as doing some cardio to improve and maintain my cardiovascular fitness.

I'll never be as slim as some of my friends and that's ok. I'm a healthy weight and fit and that is all that matters, not fitting into a size 10 or size 8. Its feasible that I could get down enough to fit into those smaller sizes but I'd have to eat a very restrictive diet and I like pasta and bread and the odd homemade scone or shortbread with my tea, even the odd bit of pudding.

@deedeethebee , I also really hate the kind of tone and judgement people have around conversations of weight. So much fear, projection and self loathing seems to come out. Yeah, yours.

OP, I’m probably 4 stone overweight and have been told I’m pre-diabetic. Since Christmas my day goes: no breakfast, 3 ryvita with homemade mushroom pate or scrambled eggs; or homemade soup for lunch. For dinner it’s usually chicken or salmon with vegetables, no carbs. On Sunday I allow myself sugar usually a desert of some sort. Drinks are tea with skimmed milk. I have 2 glasses of wine over the weekend. I have lost 1 lb in three weeks. I know my GP doesn’t believe me when I tell her what I’m eating so I’m now writing it down as I eat. One of the things that I have realised is the 6 nuts that I allow myself, sometimes twice a day, may be good for me but they still contain a lot of calories. I think that in your case it’s sugar that’s causing the problem. Because you don’t feel full up from the biscuits and bars you’re kind of dismissing them in your head as being the culprits.

See what I mean, its so emotive for women and we judge ourselves and each other so harshly on it. Its just sad.

@deedeethebee , Speak for yourself. I don't judge myself or others. If you don't like the threads don't read them,.

@UpMyself I made a perfectly reasonable post, related to the threat and you went on the offensive with a mean spirited attack, proving my point. I'm not upset or annoyed at you just disappointed that it has to be like this.

@deedeethebee , you being annoyed and disappointed is your problem not mine.

Basically any alcohol stops weight loss even if you’re in a calorie deficit is my understanding.

Join one of the very low carb boot camps here. I wrote a guide from the info given so you could have a look.

I did one and lost 6kg over 13 weeks I think.

https://www.notion.so/wattnext/e81e30528f9d43daa2ae431967afb051?v=c3189aac8c724652987cdf0283fe8e43&source=copy_link

You eat too much compared to what you burn.

An additional 120 calories from the sugar in your hot drinks daily - how much milk do you add? Could be another 100 daily. 200 calories a day from wine (2 bottles spread over 7 days). Another 190 a day from the Nature Valley bar. Possibly 200+ on a few biscuits daily. That’s without considering how much butter you’re using or oils when cooking.

That’s 700+ calories DAILY on top of meal foods.

The average height woman is around 162cm and their TDEE to maintain their weight is generally below 2,000 per day. I am 161cm and my TDEE with exercise is 1700 calories a day. So if I ate your snacks, teas and wine + just 1100 calories in meals then I would gain weight.

I don’t know your height or weight so cannot calculate your TDEE. But you can do it yourself and compare to your diet and it should show up pretty quickly.

Get an app and start weighting your food and counting calories. 100% this is the reason why - your eating more calories than your burning.

I never said it was, you responded to my post, you didn't need to do that if you don't care what I have to say. I'm also not annoyed, I don't really understand why you are being so combative.

I just googled this and the example menu given is essentially my diet 😂 I have lost 2.5st in 6 months so is working for me!

@deedeethebee , because your post seemed the most judgemental on the thread.

@UpMyself Come on you're just being silly now. I'm going to get offline and do something nice, perhaps it might be an idea if you did too.

Take one long hard look at yourself before criticizing others, @deedeethebee .
Bye.

It’s hardly an exception to lose 14lbs in 12 months (just over 1lb a month) by increasing exercise. That’s pretty expected.