Presents under the tree does it make you feel sickend

[5490t]

Just done our yearly tradition of putting the presents under the tree ready(Santa brings our stockings )
As always we said we weren't going mad! but I think roughly we've spent £1000 for me husband and 2 kids 9 and 12 I actually feel sickened trying to think what we've got for each other
Is anyone else feeling like this?

Not at all, but we’ve never spent that much on gifts. Does the £1,000 include food, or gifts for others? Maybe set yourself a budget for next year, but you’ve done the spending now, so just enjoy your day tomorrow.

No. We have spent 400 on all of us. It’s a comfortable amount for us. There are lots of lovely things under the tree.

I doubt we have even £100 worth of presents. DS I spent maybe £40 on his gifts, and DH and I said £20 limit. There are then a few other gifts DS received from other people.
This is more than last year but we don't spend silly on presents.

I spent way more than 1000 pounds and I don't give a shit.

Nope. I had mean parents and Christmases were miserable. I certainly overcompensate with my chdren but if you can’t be generous at Christmas then when can you? Generosity isn’t “sickening”. If you are buying rubbish then that is wasteful but if you’ve bought presents they will love and will be used then I don’t see the problem with it. Gifts are a way of expressing care for people and that you have thought about things that will bring them joy. Watching excited children opening Christmas presents is wonderful. I find it very strange that you find such a joyful thing “sickening”.

It’s reminiscent of the Puritans who also tried to ban feasting and carols. Do you consider Christmas dinner to be gluttonous and sickening as well, and carols to be frivolous and insufficiently solemn for the occasion? I find this self-flaggelation about anything enjoyable or indulgent even at a time of festival that was designed and timed specifically to cheer people up during the dark winter months really tiresome.

This. ^ No-one is forcing you to spend crazy amounts of money @5490t And spending £1000 on 2 children is ludicrous.

I was behind a woman in Morrisons today (I was getting less than a tenner's worth of last minute bits,) and her trolley had some booze, and some meat, but pretty much all 'Christmas stuff' Her bill was £303.00. There wasn't even a massive amount of stuff in there. I was like 😱

Why do people do this to themselves? DH and I have spent about £60 (on food for Christmas,) We don't drink alcohol, so no money spent there. We wouldn't even have spent what we did, but we have visitors tomorrow, (the DC,) and I'm doing some snacks and nibbles, (a mini buffet,) and a nice dessert (between midday and 1.30pm.) The DC and their partners don't drink alcohol either.

They will stay from 11.30am to about 3pm, then go home. Then they are going to a meal with their partners families... at around 6.30pm, in the town they live in. DH and I will just have something fairly small for our evening meal - like cod, or salmon with vegetables, and mince pies with pouring cream, or a slice o Christmas cake, or Chocolate Yule Log for dessert... (We had a Christmas roast meal out yesterday at a restaurant. So we don't want that again...)

.

LOL. The language in my post was tongue in cheek and deliberately exaggerated so to then see someone posting using that precise language but in a serious way a few posts above is quite amusing, although it’s sad that there really are people (other than my mother) who are this negative about anything that might involve any enjoyment.

Or maybe it was satire given your username and you’re impersonating a nun and think everyone should live a “convent lifestyle”? 🤔 You got me, if so! Very good. 🤣

Anyway, regardless of the uncomfortably twisted underwear of the infestation of Puritans, we shall continue to eat, drink and be merry, and give many gifts that we know other family members will enjoy.

I've no idea how much I've spent in total (some presents were bought months ago) but it probably was under £1000 this year for a family of 5. Some years I've spent more than that though (years when we've got new computers or phones paid for outright). I don't get stressed about it, it isn't getting us into debt and certain things just cost a lot these days (I like to have decent specs so when we getting something big I'd rather it was good than getting a cheaper model). This year we've bought a lot of toys, but some are second hand, so I've got a few more things than I would have if they were all new and full price. They will all get played with and dcs will have fun and maybe learn a bit, and we're happy with that.

I agree about experience over things. Give a day out with the family (or a week away) over presents every day of the week.

I’ve spent about £1,500 this Christmas. This was on 12 people and includes people who don’t get presents from anyone else, so if I don’t buy them some nice things nobody else will (vulnerable extended members of the family). I’ve got no issue with doing this. The stuff I’ve bought for my kids and their partners are practical things rather than rubbish

Merry Christmas! It is the time for amusement. I'm delighted that we have different experiences and you enjoy what you do. I wish you a wonderful time.

(and no sarcasm nor puritanical judgement from me - each to their own!)

Not me! 500 on presents for two kids and £100 for me and H’s presents, so £600 in total. Is about £100 more than I wanted to spend but I do love the kids to have a proper pile of presents to open and this may be the last year of that for eldest.

Really excited to see their faces tomorrow! So worth it!

People are complaining that OP hasn't been back but she has been a bit piled on.

I wonder if it was a genuine wondering? It has been a bit of an eye opening thread for me because I actually did assume there would be more people relating, but most people either feel nothing but happiness even if they have spent more than what we have, or they actively choose to spend less.

It's not a "puritan dislike of enjoyment", at least from my side, I think I just always feel anxious/sick with the worry of what if we can't really afford this, when spending a large sum of money. It doesn't seem to matter how much we have available (DH is on a good wage now, but we were on the breadline/in and out of debt for a long time). I thought that was a fairly common experience, but maybe it's not? If you've been struggling and then better off, how long does it take to go away? I feel a bit sick when I see the direct debit for our rent TBH!

We don't really go on holidays, so I haven't had it in relation to that.

Not at all, kids have a reasonable amount, I had a budget in mind and although I didn't purposely stick to it, everything has come out around about what I hoped to spend. I haven't put the stuff out yet but it will be nice to see it under the tree ready and waiting.

My food shop on the other hand... however, none of it will be wasted bar the odd carrot and a few sticks of celery. The turkey is far too big for all of us but I knew this and have plans to turn it into a curry on boxing day to go in the freezer for me. The cheese appears to be my dinner/supper since Monday, if I'm fed up of cheese and biscuits next week I'll make a Mac n Cheese.

I put the food shop on my credit card and paid 2/3 outright, the rest will get paid off next month. This month was always going to be a bit tight thanks to time off work and SSP so I've been getting some hours in the bank ready to pay for Christmas. It's once a year and unless you are getting into extreme debt and can't afford food in January then just go with it.

I haven't been back on because I've been busy all day so just getting round to reading he responses im very much a post once and read the results person!
It's interesting to read your thoughts and maybe I did word it wrong I just feel bad now looking at it all
And yes for those that ask we can completely afford it we haven't got into debt a lot has been brought cheap on temu or 2nd hand paid outright no debts
And we don't often spend throughout the year
The stuff I've got is going to be received well, I just feel guilty looking at it I've made sure both kids have 50 presents each but a lot is just tiny things that I've then wrapped up were also big on foody items so there's a bit of them wrapped included in that 50. And no this is just me and my family at home as already stated.

FIFTY PRESENTS EACH???

What on earth have you bought?

Fifty presents is a lot. But is some just things they need anyway? Eg we have been needing new kids paintbrushes, paper and playdough for ages. It's wrapped in their stockings. I could easily have just bought and put in the craft supplies drawer and they'd never have noticed until we got it out to use. But wrapped in a stocking and it feels like a present!

Well you’re welcome to return some of it… nobody’s forcing you to keep it

Also you shouldn’t really buy Temu crap. None of it is assessed by UK safety regulations and so can literally be dangerous - highly flammable for example or lead paint!

I don't feel bad, I hardly buy anything for anyone the rest of the year so I think it's ok.

No I love it because it’s a reflection of how hard we’ve worked. DH and I both got a little emotional this evening because our life is very different to how it was two years ago and the presents and this Christmas in general (food in the fridge, heating on, Christmas trips) are very much a reflection of that.

Sorry but exactly 50 presents each reminded me of the scene from Harry Potter where Dudley's presents are being counted. Was 50 a typo? 😅

some years we spend more, some years we spend less. It’s about keeping to a comfortable budget and picking out the perfect gifts. If you chose gifts wisely and didn’t strain your household budget, then it shouldn’t matter.

No I’m not sickened at all.
i don’t add up what we’ve spent, I don’t know what dh has spent on me or the dc anyway but I don’t know what I’ve spent on him or the dc either.
there are lots of presents under the tree that I know they will love and use and every year we’re able to be here to do it for them I’m bloody grateful. I’ve lost far too many friends far too young who never got to see their kids grow into adulthood - 2 of mine are now adults and how lucky I am to be able to spoil them and still spend Christmases with them. We have a lot to look forward to over the next 10 days - it’s certainly not all about the presents, but they are fun and I love spoiling them.