The lead up to fucking Christmas can fuck off

[1wokeuplikethis]

The next 2 weeks are so rammajammed with school activities (carols, jumper day, craft afternoon, panto trip, assembly etc) like usual the school goes into crackhead-level hysteria ramming more stuff into the last 2 weeks of the longest term than they do the rest of the entire year.

I’m not a teacher, just a mum trying to remember it all and keep up. On top of this is the lovely things I’ve booked for us to do as a family, which is hugely scaled back because trying to do too much stresses me out. And I know me and the kids all need downtime to relax and rejuvenate and filling each day with commercial crap is knackering and leaves me feeling jaded anyway.

Along with this, the present buying, wrapping, ordering, returning. Meal planning, ordering, buying. Catching up with friends. Work Christmas do. Seeing family. Trying to keep the house tidy, work, cook meals, attend clubs/sports/hobbies, make packed lunches, remember fucking everything all at once and then also be a spirited elf of joy with family and friends. I’m fucking knackered. I’m miserable. My sleep is shot. I’ve been on the verge of crying all day. The things I normally enjoy bring me no joy because I just have this underlying feeling of stress, panic and misery.

How can I let go, relax and try to enjoy these next 2 weeks? Please. I’ve come home from my son’s carol concert feeling deflated, sad and overwhelmed, yet also like I’m not doing enough (which is actual madness). Hand me a grip please.

I used to feel like this at Christmas time and it was not enjoyable for any of us! I was snappy and one year I decided that’s it, NO MORE. I now do lots of lovely activities at home that are way less stressful and also cheaper, I only agree to do things that I actually want to do, I’ve said no to Christmas work night out etc, and also deleted social media. I am trying to look for and enjoy the small things in life that I actually enjoy. Movies at home, crafts with the kids, long walks round the park, baking. Everything else is just added stress more money and I feel so much better for saying no to it!

Are their activities optional? I always used to sack off the last week or two of those in winter term and go home and watch Christmas movies or make paper chains. Something that feels restful and connective and a good antidote to the whirlwind happening outside.

if you’re feeling overwhelmed maybe the kids are too - and there are so many bugs flying around, just get to Xmas healthy and if that means doing less (but hopefully enjoying those things more because you’re doing less!) then go for it.

Cant wait till everyone really starts thinking for themselves and not going along with things just because its what they've always done.

Who says we have to go along with all these traditions? Cards, trees, presents, carols, santa every 12 months.
When you think of it the stuff starts appearing in September, so your only really free of seeing it for 9 months. Ludicrous.

Why does everyone expect presents. They have a birthday for that.

Its was the Victorians that started it but they are long gone now.
Up to us to change it now.
Agree its so boring.

@Netcurtainnelly - exactly. I did just that. Why stress over something that is self inflicted and not mandatory.
We do Christmasy things, like go get a tree from local farm, bake gingerbread, decorate house, watch Christmas films and read books. But I’m not gonna to stress about school inflicted stuff, visits to grottos, having to buy a million gifts.

Everyone tries to jam all this ‘jolly’ and goodwill into one month and if you object to the pace and frantic nature of it all, you’re a ‘Scrooge’. Wouldn’t it be lovely if we could spread out the joy over 12 months and then the world would be a smidge nicer all year round. I think I’ll start a petition. 😂

But I totally understand OP. Every year, I have this low grade anxiety from about the 10th onwards - it’s a sort of worry over how much there is to do, how to make it ‘special’ (which is impossible) and how to manage the inevitable conflicts.

No need for sarky comments. OP is struggling as many people do at this time of year.

I’ve never understood why people choose to do all this stuff and then spend ages complaining about it all.

This is my favourite time of year!

I'm trying to learn from my Mum and not be a martyr. She is awful at that, still goes on about how much she has to do for Christmas and how busy she is buying and wrapping, cooking, getting the house ready. But, she's retired, isn't hosting anyone over Christmas, so no extra cleaning, or cooking or shopping. I think she cant get out the mindset of when we were kids and there was a lot of stuff to do.

Yes, its flipping wonderful.

Yanbu. Ds is full of cold and has passed it onto me & dh, and we’ve been expected to come into school 3 times this week! probably given our colds to half the school! No idea why they wait till the very last two weeks to demand parents to come in.

@IsThisLifeNow

I'm trying to learn from my Mum and not be a martyr. She is awful at that, still goes on about how much she has to do for Christmas and how busy she is buying and wrapping, cooking, getting the house ready. But, she's retired, isn't hosting anyone over Christmas, so no extra cleaning, or cooking or shopping. I think she cant get out the mindset of when we were kids and there was a lot of stuff to do

My MIL this week was moaning about how she hasn’t had time to do various things because she’s “so busy with Christmas”.

She’s fully retired, isn’t hosting at all on any day, doesn’t buy gifts for adults, and asks for AMazon links to buy for her 3 grandkids!! What is she actually doing?!

Some people will complain about winning the lottery - it’s almost like it’s their personality to never be happy about something!

Maybe because it's dark and miserable out there, maybe because lights, carols, baking smells and family together lifts the spirit?

Presents aren't a new inventions, the Romans had this already and while it moved to New Year originally until the more modern age, it was a long existing tradition.

Santa is based on St. Nikolaus, a 4th century bishop in nowaday Turkey. Again, not new. He gave gifts in Germany until the reformation when Luther invented the Christkind and moved gifts to Christmas.

It's up to you to choose what you want, it's not difficult to ignore the gift ideas and food until November/December if you want to. I do and manage without a breakdown in the supermarket isle if I see a mince pie in September.

I love Christmas and all the traditions but I choose what I engage in and how I do it.

Ha, if it wasn't for your MIL only having 3 grandkids I'd have wondered if you were my SIL!

What is it with this mindset? Do they honestly believe they are busier that people who have young kids and jobs?!