Do you know anyone who has just disappeared?

[Almostchristmastime]

I was reading about missing cases and I was surprised by how many people simply vanish, never to be seen again.
I don’t know of anyone personally who has just disappeared, but many years ago before my Dad retired, he had a work colleague, who was in his late 50’s, he left his work place and he’s believed to have never made it home. He simply just vanished, his family spent months trying to find him, there were no letters, or clues to his whereabouts and as far as I know, still remains missing to this day.

Must awful for the family, never knowing. Well unless as stated above, its the family they are in hiding from

I didn't know her, but my grandmother's sister. Left and never returned.

Also my schoolfriend. We used to walk to school together. One day, when we were in our teens, I went round to her house, hoping to walk with her. Family said she wasn't there. Never saw her again. Later, I wondered if it was an arranged marriage.

Husband of a family friend. Left his wife bankrupt, think he had been hiding debts form her. Turns out he took a boat and sailed to America!! Never spoke to his wife again.

Are you not concerned these could be linked to the same perpetrator? Unless your town is huge, that seems low odds for all three to go missing under similar circumstances.

It's a town of 10 000 people with virtually no crime. It has never crossed anybody's mind I'm aware of that foul play was involved.

My neighbour was always washing his car. One day he went out and was never seen again. His car was found in a station car park months later. His poor parents died never knowing what happened to him.

Wow.. so sorry you have had to deal with this. Cannot imagine how hard it has been for you and your family

I have no recollection, I was a toddler, DM never spoke about him, we instinctively knew it was a no go subject. I didn't know anything until I was in my mid 20s. I think he had a double life.

A teenage boy I knew who was involved with shady adults, pulled into drugs, crime and, I suspect, organised sexual abuse.
He came and went for long periods of time, finally disappearing for good.
The police drew a blank, there was no response to advertisements in social and other media. His bank account was untouched.
I am convinced he was murdered.

I saw a similar video regarding a case in Surrey. Several witness reported seeing a car veer off the road on the A3 but when police searched they couldn’t find evidence of a fresh crash. They did find a car that had been there for 5 / 6 months with human remains. That driver was identified - no evidence of any other car though. Very weird.

We had this very thread like a week ago

That's not true. How would that work if a family has to go into witness protection? 4 or 5 people - incl children? And this has happened before, a whole family needing to disappear for their own protection. The very close members know (parents usually,) and most others are just told they have moved away.

Do you really think anyone could explain away the deaths of a family of 2 adults, and several children, with no bodies or funeral, without a big media interest, if everyone who is related to them just thought they were dead? No way are close family members going to accept or believe that a whole family of 2 adults and several children have all just died, and 'don't exist anymore...'

.

The landlord of a nearby pub disappeared, he must have been planning it as he went with an undisclosed amount of money and presumably a fake passport. I have no idea why his story was in the local paper.Never heard of since and it must be 20 years ago.

Yes, it's not true unless the family members are who someone needs protecting from.

Contact with family members is usually facilitated through the program so the individuals identity and location is not compromised.

But people who have a loved one disappear don't usually need to consider that they might have been whisked away into witness protection.

My cousin. One of 3 brothers he said he had got a job in the USA police. Just disappeared. His other brothers tried to locate him as the police knew nothing about him working for them and, as this was about 30 years ago there was not much in the way of a paper trail. He also has a really common name that’s hard to trace.

Personally no, but I know of 2 people, both now reported as presumed dead (given ages, likely in both instances).
One was the grandparent of someone my DC was at school with. They lived overseas, and used to take a daily walk around the neighbourhood where they were well known. They went out one day, were seen along part of the route by several people but never went home.

The other was a distant relative. Had emigrated, got married and then divorced (or separated). Some time shortly after that they just disappeared. Their sister never knew what became of them. Neither did their children.

I am sure the majority of women who just 'leave' their families and never contact anyone again have been murdered by their partner.

Many years ago a chap who worked where I used to work made an elaborate plan to steal some artefacts from the workplace. He went to work as overtime on the Saturday morning, took the items, leaving cleverly made forgeries then vanished.

No clue where he'd gone, though it was suspected he'd gone overseas, no message to his wife or children, absolutely nothing.
The artefacts never turned up either. I often wonder where he went.

My mum lives in Australia and knows a couple who had a boat. They had the boat docked but needed a small metal boat to get out to the bigger boat. One day the wife was on the bigger boat and the husband took the smaller one to the shore because there was a fault with it. She waited hours but he was never seen again, they reckon a croc got him.

Yes, a close friends mum disappeared, leaving my friend 10, and two DSs aged 6 and 3. Everyone thought she had been murdered.

She turned up in Yorkshire (we live south coast) eight years later. She had been having an affair and just decided to abandon her kids and run off with her lover.

Luckily my friends dad was a lovely man and a great dad. He somehow managed to make it work and keep the roof over their head.

Another friend’s husband went missing and she had to have him declared missing presumed dead after many years and so much money spent trying to find him, so she could divorce and re marry. He showed up a few years after that in Singapore.

So do loads of people just die in random places, get kidnapped/trafficked or is it actually easy to run away and start a new life?

Yes. 'L'.
Back in about 1998 i worked in a small lingerie shop. I was the youngest, in my 20s then, and there was 3 other, 'older' ladies (40s/50s).

We got on really well in the shop and had regular evening get togethers - sometimes in one of our houses or out at a pub, and had a really great laugh.

On the morning right after one of our Friday eve get togethers, when we'd had a good time as usual and said 'see you in the morning!' ect, the manageress and i opened the shop up. We waited for 'L' to turn up for her shift - but she never came.

To cut a long story short we'd all gone home as usual the night before - she to her house. And in the morning L had got up, washed up and packed her bags and left. Took the car and just gone. She left a husband and older daughter. No note. Nothing.

It was the most bizarre thing. Although we were on the peripherals of her life, compared to her family, it still affected us deeply. Confusion. Sadness. Guilt even! Because we hadn't seen it coming. She's not confided in us. A police officer even came to our shop to have a chat with us one at a time. We were just bewildered by it.

As the weeks turned into months it was as if she'd died. We grieved.
I hope you're ok and happy where ever you went L 💐

Me, kind of.

I had a long term relationship with a very abusive and frightening person. I finally left one day and cut all contact with not only my ex, but all the family and friends that we had in common. So I suppose I could be said to have disappeared from my ex’s point of view.

I didn't know her (she vanished way before I was born) but I'm from Coventry so we all know about Nicola Payne. Just disappeared on her walk home I believe. Never been found, it's so sad 💔 I hope her remaining family get answers one day.

Yes, a close friends mum disappeared, leaving my friend 10, and two DSs aged 6 and 3. Everyone thought she had been murdered.
She turned up in Yorkshire (we live south coast) eight years later. She had been having an affair and just decided to abandon her kids and run off with her lover.
Luckily my friends dad was a lovely man and a great dad. He somehow managed to make it work and keep the roof over their head.

Doubly awful for the husband/father in those circs. There must have been a lot of suspicion and finger pointing. One would hope a woman would at least let the police know she was safe, to prevent suspicion falling on innocent people.