Small but massively irritating things people do in public

[PuppiesProzacProsecco]

Thread Sub- Heading: things people do that make you want to punch them

I'll qualify this by saying I'm autistic and have misophonia so am probably more easily wound up than the average person!

Right now I'm sat in a hospital outpatient department waiting for my orthopaedic appointment and the others in the waiting area are driving me nuts!

One seat over- Youngish (late 20s) female who has huge, pointy, fake nails on and is using the ends to tap her phone screen - ARGHHHH! She's also sniffing A LOT.

One seat further from her - middle aged lady (wearing gorgeous knee high boots) who has the touch tones switched on on her phone - that awful bubbling noise at high volume - ARGGHHHH!

Other side of the room - 30s ish lady who is getting almost constant messaging alerts (again, volume is UP) on her phone - ARRRRRRRGHHHHH! She's also foot tapping like crazy.

Reading this back, the main issue seems to be bloody phones though!

Tell me your stories of things you didn't murder people in public for (but could've claimed justifiable homicide if you had). Make me feel like less of an evil cow 🙈

People who dawdle walking along the pavement and then suddenly stop so you have to divert around them!

People who are completely mesmerised by their phones when you are trying to talk to them.

@PistachioTiramisu yes to both of these and also to people who stop in the middle of supermarket aisles to have long catch ups with old friends/past colleagues/random fuckers and block entire aisles!

Stopping dead in the middle of the street

Hanging around in shop doorways

Smoking or vaping where others have to walk through their foul emissions

Chatting to cashiers when there's a queue

Existing

It's sniffing for me.

When I'm PM I will introduce secret sniffing police. If you're caught excessively sniffing you will be taken to a re-education camp and taught to blow your nose.

Walking 3 or 4 abreast across the pavement. Really slowly

crossing the road diagonally so they go across everybody’s way

I LOATHE loud chewing. I hate sitting on a packed train where commuters chomp through a packet of crisps like they’ve never seen food in their life.

Not a minor - completely fucking disgusting and unacceptable but twice now I’ve seen someone clipping their toenails in PUBLIC. Some people just have no shame.

This drives me mad also a group of people coming towards you filling the whole width of the pavement with no intention of giving you room to pass , I usually say that I hadn’t realised the pavement was one way tends to get the message across

People on tube, train or bus stations platforms who rush forwards and don’t allow any space for others to get off!

People having phone conversations in public ditto listening to films or whatever audio in public.

Spitting (but I don’t consider that a small thing. It’s horrible and disgusting.)

People chewing gum. People chewing with mouth open. People who need to clear their throat but don't and carry on talking in phlegmy voice!
Loud chewing( family) accept for my dogs😀

music played out loud on buses and trains
standing at the bus stop so they block the entire pavement
people walking several abreast across the pavement so you can't walk the opposite way, and are seemingly oblivious to the fact you're about to walk into them!

Oo yes spitting...and 'hoicking' it up beforehand. Footballers spitting is grim too..not that I watch it much!

vaping

I have PMT so this may be long...
People who leave their car engines running while they sit in it
People who have conversations/watch stuff on their phone on loudspeaker
People who play music in their car so loudly that you can hear it when they drive past
People who sniff or throat clear continuously
People who chew with their mouth open
People who try and get into a lift while I'm trying to get out of it
Colleagues who reply to group emails asking whether anyone can swap a shift with "Sorry, I can't" (Just don't fucking reply then)
People who don't pick up dog shit

That will do for now, I am winding myself up 😂

Everything @MotherofPufflings said plus families or groups of friends who walk 3 or 4 abreast across a path or pavement and seem to expect everyone to dive out of their way into the road. I now make sure I'm taking up space as well so they have to separate round me.

All of those would annoy me but I can add my top one which is when men (and it is only ever men) do that horrible snorty sniff thing. It's almost a guttural sound. It makes me feel sick.

Also in the running:
People who say 'literally' when it isn't literal ("I literally died with shame")
People who say 'obviously ' when it isnt ("Obvously John's cousins dog has herpes")

People on social media finger-wagging before showing you a 'hack', or nail-tapping on products

I think it boils down to people, really

Anyone dithering or dawdling.
i tend to wear headphones when im out and about alone so I don’t get annoyed by noises too!

Fellow misophone here. Bloody, effing whistling. It is physically painful to me. It makes me feel like ripping my own head open.

People near me who say
LIKE
KINDA
REACH OUT
HEY
Middle class kids who think they sound cool talking ghetto
People in pubs restaurants gym who keep looking at phone
Or who walk in front of my car on a phone or listening to headphones
People at theatre who at the end of a performance do that idiotic whooooooo noise like a moronic American instead of cheering or saying hurrah or bravo

Once clattered a woman who stopped dead at the bottom of a tube escalator. Idiot.

People who walk 2/3/4 abreast and expect you to walk on the road. Nope. I'm moving to the inside and you can get on the road if you all want to walk holding hands. I don't tend to do this for elderly/infirm/kids. I'm not a complete prick!

I consider playing audio out loud a big thing. When I'm in charge it'll be punished by flogging.

People who give huge sneezes or cough hackingly without covering their mouth.

Chewing gum. Cannot bear it. Hate the way it looks, the way it sounds and the way it smells.

People who start sentences with "So, ........"

Whilst I waiting for a train I once saw someone on the platform across from me reach into their rucksack remove their socks and started cutting their toenails! Just yuck. I had to look away.
Also if someone sitting in our lunch room at work eats with their mouth open. Also used to have this with one particular girl who also used to make sort of slapping noises with her mouth. People that stuff loads of food in their mouth and look like a hamster and chew for ages.
Also the shaking their leg whilst bored day in a training session etc.
Maybe I'm not very tolerant.........