Cheapest thing a person has ever done

[Unorganisedchaos2]

Inspired by the children's birthday party thread, Im sure this has been done so many times but humor me as Im stuck at home with a poorly DD...

Our family once knew a couple who were convinced that the baby they were due to have shouldn't cost them any more than the family allowance and a grant I believe you used to get in the early 2000's. Some of the things they did:

• Commented that it had worked out well that the baby was born 2 months prem as they had been able to claim family allowance but he hadn't cost them anything yet as the hospital were providing nappies, milk etc.
• Refused to visit the baby until the hospital had issued a free parking pass then only visited 3 times a week because they were tired and as it was a 30 minute it was already costing a lot in petrol.
• Did a separate food shop for him of all supermarket own brand food and £1 meals, she actually had "his money" in one of those money bags the bank used and made the checkout person run it through as two separate shops.
• Spent hours in charity shops buying up the next few years with of clothes for him, at his second birthday they were asking us to buy clothes for 7-8 year old.
• Asked my mum to register as a childminder so they could claim childcare but expected my mum to do it for free (not honestly sure how that was ever going to work out)
• Not child related but he refused to drive above 50 MPH because he believed it was uneconomical, even if he was late for work or holding up a queue of traffic.

My uncle was incredibly tight fisted. Him
and his wife had a ‘big’ wedding anniversary coming up, he said they go out for lunch to celebrate (they rarely ate out).

He took her to M&S, bought sandwiches, and they ate them on a park bench. She wasn’t impressed….

"I asked her to bring a loaf of bread, two packs of bacon and a box of eggs so we could all have a bacon butty for breakfast whilst getting ready, she also enjoyed a lovely sandwich. A couple of weeks after the wedding she asked me to transfer her £10 for the breakfast items."

Sorry, but I think this is fair. It would be one thing if you told her to bring her own breakfast, but you gave her a precise shopping list for things YOU chose so yes, you should pay.

As a social worker I've been involved with a number of families where parents have to be told that they are expected to come to the hospital every day and stay for the whole day and that it's not ok to expect nurses to look after their baby while they pop up for a few hours to fit around their other commitments. You'd be shocked at how some people think.

I noticed a workman who was at my house recently just for the morning was charging up his phone and power tools. It's bloody cheeky tbh.

I think what we can all take from this thread is to tell people who we know have money and the means to access it, to piss off if they ask us to do things for them so they can save money.

@RosesAndHellebores Oh that puts a different light entirely on it, my response was clouded by my own experience. Thank you for explaining that. I'm very sad people can be so mean.
@ThatJollyGreySquid yes poor mum, her mum was bloody awful too, I guess it made her easy to boss about.
However all that walking and vegetarian diet, followed in later years a much improved diet (still mainly vegetarian but with some oily fish less cheap filler food) has resulted in a very healthy 90 year old with an excellent brain. Walking daily, lots of veg she grew herself (it was cheaper), and a vegetarian diet does work for a good old age. I'm delighted my dear mum is getting a good number of happy years at last, she's learning to leave the negative memories behind, and she's living around the corner from me, so I'm there to support her and she's still growing a bit of veg! Although we do the digging now 🤣.

My fil is as tight as a tight thing. me and my partner took him away for a few days for his birthday cost us about £1k. My partner’s birthday a couple of weeks later got an Easter egg. My birthday a couple of weeks after that I got nothing.

Surely this entirely depends on why the baby is is in hospital? When my baby was in the NICU I couldn’t do any of her care. I couldn’t administer drugs, she was fed so carefully so as not to aspirate that that was a nurses job, they would occasionally let me change a nappy if they had the time to supervise because everything had to be weighed. I couldn’t get her in and out of the incubator without a nurse present to disconnect and reconnect monitors and it really wasn’t warm enough outside the incubator for any length of time her anyway. I was also in-patient so I did spend most of my time just sitting with a finger through the little window on the incubator but I certainly wouldn’t judge someone who had been discharged and had to travel and might have other children at home too who did not do that.

I'm not certain about this one, tbh. Most people tend to charge their phones because that's when they need charging; so it's about necessity/opportunity rather than tightness (plus the cost for the electricity is virtually nothing). If it really bothered you, I'm sure the majority of folk wouldn't object to handing over a penny; but if he were so determined to be tight, he could have added an extra fiver to your bill and you likely wouldn't have noticed or quibbled, rather than clandestinely 'steal' a penny by charging his phone.

The batteries for the tools obviously cost a little bit more to charge than a phone, but again, I don't think he's deliberately 'hoarding' power at somebody else's expense to be a CF; he's just making sure that his tools will stay working - whether he needs them for you (and often tradies don't know for certain exactly how many of their tools they will end up needing for any individual job) or for the one he goes straight to from yours.

I can see a parallel between this and the other thread about the Amazon delivery woman asking to use OP's toilet: she could hardly go for 6 wees all in one go in her own home before starting work, to set herself up for the entire day.

When we moved to our current house it took me less than a week to work out the optimum speed and position to knock my wife's car into neutral, and when to brake, so that it would coast the last 350m onto our driveway without pressing the accelerator again.

Genuine question - obviously the sides and sauce thing is a bit mental. But as a young person who’s just bought a house, we had a few bbqs this year to see friends where it was “you bring burgers, you bring sausages and we’ll get chicken” or we’d ask them to bring the sides or the drinks etc, and I didn’t really see the problem? We’re the only ones with a garden for a bbq and like to see our friends but we’re all skint and can’t really afford to fund it all every time! I thought it was kind of fair for everyone to bring something (including us!)? Now I’m wondering if I’m a cheapskate and all our friends thought we were awful! Or maybe as we’re all in our 20s no kids etc it’s more normal to split things this way?

Have posted this on the dating thread but it made me chuckle so sharing it here as well!

I had a date last night, he showed up late so I went up to the bar and got the first round in. When my date arrived instead of saying thanks for the drink he called the bartender over and asked if he could scan his loyalty card for the drinks I'd just paid for. Bartender said it was too late, date grumbled a bit and bartender offered to refund the drinks then run the purchase again with the loyalty card. Date was delighted and looked at me expectantly, I said absolutely no way am I wasting mine and the poor bartenders time with such a faff. Needless to say there won't be another date!

pp won't be talking about mothers who have just given birth and are patients themselves or who have babies/children in intensive care rather than a ward.

To be fair, that should have been a given that you paid for her dress etc. The bride should surely pay? I do think you should have paid for breakfast as well, rather than asking her to foot the bill for your "getting ready" breakfast.
If you couldn't afford it, you should have asked them to get ready at home and meet you at the venue, like people used to do.

SIL lives in the states and is as tight as a duck's arse! When she came to our wedding. her parents paid for the flight, she brought no present.
When her baby was born she sent us a link for an online catalogue so we could send a gift. She came to visit us she was visiting her parents who paid for her flight. She brought nothing and conveniently has no sterling either.
She went to the local estate agents, got a catalogue to see how much our house was worth. Over the last 18 years, we have sent a gift to her DC every Christmas.She has tried in the past to pick expensive gifts for us to purchase but we said that we would like to choose the gift. Although we have no kids, she has never sent anything to my husband. The second time she visited, she agin brought nothing. On one occasion, when visiting her parents, they were going off for a few days (parents paying), she had to drive because her dad was unwell. As the parents didn't have a credit card to pay for the extra insurance to cover her, she contacted by DH and suggested he pays as she didn't have an "English credit card!" I could go on.......

I agree that you should have at least offered her the money.
The dress was a maid of honour dress for your wedding along with the shoes.
It wasn't a dress for her to wear when she goes out. She was assisting you at your wedding.
You asked her to purchase food for the immediate wedding party and expected her to pay for it. Not cool!

We had workmen recently who were charging up their tools at our house.
I didn't give it a second's thought! It's pennies!
Do you expect them to drive home to recharge their tools before going to the next job? I think you're tight!

As the parents didn't have a credit card to pay for the extra insurance to cover her, she contacted by DH and suggested he pays as she didn't have an "English credit card!"

That is truly desperate CFery. One of the very first things they push when promoting credit cards is that they're accepted worldwide!

The days of the old 'oops I forgot my wallet' grift must be numbered too, as very few people will be willing to go out for an evening without taking their phone with them - and if you have a phone (unless it's one of the brickphones that are normally only used by very young children or elderly people who aren't very tech savvy), you have an easy way to pay!

And before the days of battery-operated tools they would’ve had to use mains power the whole time anyway. And possibly leave a window open for an extension cord, letting the heat out (shock horror!). So I agree the PP is tight!

Absolutely. And if they were using corded tools - which most don't nowadays, as they're much less versatile - would any householders think for a second to cavil about them needing to plug them in to their electricity supply?

X-posted with Parsleyforme!

I went out with a man and we went to stay with his female friend in a nice european city. The friend couldnt do enough for us...drove us all round the city showing us the best attractions, made several lovely meals, huge breakfasts etc etc. When we left, my boyfriend gave her a really TINY pot of jam as a present and was really pleased with himself for his ' generosity'. I felt soooo embarrassed at his inappropriateness and went out and got her a huge expensive plant. Needless to say, we split up shirtly sfterwards.

Yes, I agree. Not great.

It's not ok to expect nurses to look after their patients? In a hospital? Huh, never knew that. I mean, I get that most parents would WANT to be there. But what if they both work FT? Or have other preschoolers at home?

My mum is very cheeky and cheap.

Shes a nurse and fosterer. Shes always busy. I could not live the way she does. I think this causes her to be cheeky.

She started work at a new hospital and noticed a house with no car on the drive. She knocked on this strangers door and asked if she could use the drive to park….and a sweet elderly couple allowed her!

Very embarrassing having such a cheeky mum.