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Taking my son out of school for 5 days but not sure how to word email

68 replies

stressedandamess · 29/10/2025 15:32

So I know I may get abuse but hey ho. I'll do bullet points, it will be easier
13 year old son who has ADHD was bullied in his old high school since year 7. (5 year old daughter is coming too)
I have moved him to a better school and he is so much happier but still has nightmares.
Been there since 2nd week in September
I am a single parent and we have never been on holiday.
I found a cheap holiday for Turkey and we go on 16th November for 5 days
I'm debating to put this in the email to the new school or shall I just say we are going and thats it. I dont want to be rude and theyve really helped him since hes started there.

I don't plan to take him away again during term time and I know I will get a fine but I think he really needs this and so do I tbh, its been a nightmare few years.

I'd appreciate any advice

OP posts:
DiscoBob · 29/10/2025 15:37

Being bullied in his previous school and the fact you've never been abroad on holiday don't really mitigate it. I would just say something like..

' We are going on X date and back y date. Apologies for any inconvenience and if it's possible to take work for the days he misses that would be much appreciated. I understand this isn't the norm and will be a one off. If you need to discuss it further please do contact me.'

That should do it.

VikaOlson · 29/10/2025 15:37

Dear school, child will be absent from x date to x date due to a family holiday,
Best wishes,
Me.

VikaOlson · 29/10/2025 15:37

DiscoBob · 29/10/2025 15:37

Being bullied in his previous school and the fact you've never been abroad on holiday don't really mitigate it. I would just say something like..

' We are going on X date and back y date. Apologies for any inconvenience and if it's possible to take work for the days he misses that would be much appreciated. I understand this isn't the norm and will be a one off. If you need to discuss it further please do contact me.'

That should do it.

Asking for them to provide work is pretty cheeky!

Tickingcrocodile · 29/10/2025 15:41

It won't make a difference how you word it, it will be unauthorised if it is for a holiday. Just let them know the dates he will be absent. If it's a one-off you will just get a fine. If he has two more absences for holidays of five days or more within the next three years you risk being taken to court.

BCBird · 29/10/2025 15:41

Don't ask for work. As an ex teacher I will tell u this was a nuisance as it was rarely done. I learned the hard way. If he's only been there such a short time I would have thought a holiday so soon after he had settled would not be in his best interests.

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 29/10/2025 15:43

I would have thought that taking him out of school during his first term there is not the most sensible thing to do as he settles into his new school and tries to establish new friendships!

However, since this is what you’ve decided is best, you’ll just have to email them to tell them the dates he will be absent 🤷🏻‍♀️ Do NOT ask them to set work - you might want to reassure them that HE will take responsibility for catching up on the five days of lessons he’s missed in all his subjects and that this term time holiday will not generate additional work for his subject teachers…

CeeJay81 · 29/10/2025 15:44

Our school have a absence form to fill in, they want a month's notice though. So if it's less than that I guess you would have to email them or ring. As has been said, you can't expect work to be given. We take the kids out most years for a few days but it's our responsibility to make sure the kids catch up etc.

Notagain75 · 29/10/2025 15:45

If he is now settled and happy at school after having a bad time at his previous school I don't think you should disrupt things now by taking him out of school during the term . He may struggle to catch up and restablish himself if he misses a week.
But if you have already decided to take him out all you need to put in the email are the facts.
DearX
Son will not be at school between x and X as we will be taking our annual family holiday

Soontobe60 · 29/10/2025 15:45

The school will have a form that you complete with the reason for your absence. Under no circumstances ask for the teachers to provide him with any work! Expecting them to do more work in their own time so he can go on holiday (and possibly complete it last minute as soon as he gets home) is pretty cheeky.
Also, I’m not sure if you’re aware, but Turkey in November is dead in the usual tourist places.

WonderingWanda · 29/10/2025 15:46

They aren't going to authorise it so I wouldn't spend any time worrying about your wording. Just notify them he will be going and tell them you will ensure he catches up on return.

NConthe · 29/10/2025 15:47

The nerve of asking for work 😅 don’t do that OP! It’ll be bloody cold in Turkey in November and your son has just started to settle in his new school.

Really, I’d reconsider for a nice sunny break in the holidays next year. What’s your budget? Maybe we can help.

LoveSundays · 29/10/2025 15:51

The 16th is a Sunday and you're going for 5 days? So you get back on the Thursday? If so, then it's only 4 days off school so they'll be no fine.
Just email and tell them he is having 4 days off for a holiday.

stressedandamess · 29/10/2025 16:03

Thank you everyone. As its a school connected to his primary he has friends there already so thats not a problem.

I will NOT ask for homework lol

OP posts:
DiscoBob · 29/10/2025 16:15

VikaOlson · 29/10/2025 15:37

Asking for them to provide work is pretty cheeky!

Yeah I know. I mean I think the whole thing's cheeky so why not ask?

winterbluess · 29/10/2025 16:20

Just tell that you'll be on holiday.. no point beating about the bush 🤷‍♀️ the rest is irrelevant to them

stressedandamess · 29/10/2025 16:23

@NConthe Yes Ive heard it will be dead and cold but then others have said it would be 22-28 degrees and still quite lively so I have no idea.

OP posts:
Tutorpuzzle · 29/10/2025 16:24

I hope you have a really lovely holiday and do lots of exploring, whatever the weather! It’s a beautiful country.

Rainbowcat77 · 29/10/2025 16:28

VikaOlson · 29/10/2025 15:37

Dear school, child will be absent from x date to x date due to a family holiday,
Best wishes,
Me.

Yes just this, they won’t authorise it and they probably won’t set work. So, be prepared to add the cost of the fine to your holiday if they decide to go down that route and take responsibility for helping him catch up on the five days work once back.

ByeByeThyroid · 29/10/2025 16:30

Don’t forget to factor in your daughter’s fines too. She’s 5 so you will be fined for her as well

CreativeGreen · 29/10/2025 16:35

Seems a bit odd to do this just as he's settled in, no doubt as the result of considerable work and effort by the staff. And kind of sends the wrong message to the staff about how much you might or might not appreciate any of that. So, I dunno, word it as you please: the message is the same, isn't it?

ninjahamster · 29/10/2025 16:45

Is it really a good deal once you add school fines on for two children?

Anditstartedagain · 29/10/2025 16:50

The weather will likely be cold and rainy in turkey, certaintly not beach or pool weather. Most tourists areas will be closed for winter by then.

PastaAllaNorma · 29/10/2025 17:00

It's 15-20 degrees in daytime on the coast, generally speaking, and can drop pretty cool at night. Most places don't have heating so pack with that in mind.

CeeJay81 · 29/10/2025 17:09

It depends where in Turkey. Antalya area probably early 20s. Other areas cooler.

TheChosenTwo · 29/10/2025 17:11

I just emailed school the day before we went away to say ds would be absent for the next 2 days due to a family holiday and left it at that, they didn’t come back to me.
Dont ask for work, not much in schools is done on ‘sheets’ as standalone lessons, lessons generally require an input, practice together and then they will go off an attempt something independently - the school I worked at most recently did use sheets for some things of course but as little as possible. They’ll be part way through topics, just go if you’re going!

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