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What would you think if these things went missing from your home

65 replies

Eastie77Returns · 25/10/2025 18:44

A gold chain
A pair of leggings
A woman’s brand new hoodie (quite pricey, premiere league team branded)
A canvas tote bag

The chain was not expensive, left in a jewellery box and suddenly disappeared. The leggings were compression ones, bought to help address a health issue and about £100. Tote bag a few quid.

The only person who regularly comes to our house is our weekly cleaner. She is brilliant and I’m really struggling to imagine her taking this stuff but I literally have no idea where the items could be. The hoodie and leggings were left drying on a heated dryer and have vanieshed.

OP posts:
RollyPollyBatFace · 25/10/2025 18:45

I’d either sack her or I’d put a camera in - which is probably not a road to go down tbh

FuzzyWolf · 25/10/2025 18:46

The most likely reason is usually the correct one so I would suspect your cleaner. Can you start by asking her where she put them when she moved them?

Zempy · 25/10/2025 18:47

Who else lives in your house? Anyone who might have addiction issues or need cash? Otherwise I guess it’s the cleaner or a poltergeist.

YorkieTheRabbit · 25/10/2025 18:47

Who lives in your home? Any kids who have friends round, or does your cleaner ever bring anyone with her?

DisplayPurposesOnly · 25/10/2025 18:49

If it's 'our' house then the options are wider than you and your cleaner.

lilyboleyn · 25/10/2025 18:50

I’d think she’s put the clothes away for you. She may have borrowed the tote bag, or put it away.
By itself, the chain can be explained, I suppose - if you like her and you can’t imagine her stealing, I’d ask where she’d put the clothes away, and see her reaction to that rather than the chain (which is more obviously asking her if she’s pinched it)

NotForTheMoneyandNotForTheApplause · 25/10/2025 18:51

Id assume she'd put the clothes away and ask her where she's put them, depending on her response will determine what you do next

Eastie77Returns · 25/10/2025 18:52

DC are 10 and 12. The 12 year old has a couple of friends who visit but the leggings and hoodie would not fit them or be anything they’d be interested in. I’m certain DP doesn’t have any addiction issues. He doesn’t smoke, drink or go out unless taking DC to activities or his hobby (coaching kids at a sport).

I’m really trying to think of some alternative to the cleaner but not sure there is one.

Edited to say DP doesn’t have addiction issues, not DC!

OP posts:
FuzzyWolf · 25/10/2025 18:54

The children or their friends could have inadvertently damaged the hoodie and leggings and disposed of them rather than risked getting told off.

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 25/10/2025 18:54

Either of the kids showing signs of being bullied?

Eastie77Returns · 25/10/2025 18:57

lilyboleyn · 25/10/2025 18:50

I’d think she’s put the clothes away for you. She may have borrowed the tote bag, or put it away.
By itself, the chain can be explained, I suppose - if you like her and you can’t imagine her stealing, I’d ask where she’d put the clothes away, and see her reaction to that rather than the chain (which is more obviously asking her if she’s pinched it)

She has never put clothes away as it’s not part of her remit. Also the leggings and hoodie were on a heated dryer with other items so if she was putting those two items away, why not the other clothes?

OP posts:
Sassylovesbooks · 25/10/2025 18:57

Does anyone else live in your home? If you do have others living in your home, then you do need to consider that one of them may have taken the items. Failing that, you need to install a camera. You can't accuse your cleaner without any proof, especially if you have other people living in the house, besides yourself.

HannahHamptonsGloves · 25/10/2025 18:57

I'd drop her a message and make light of it - along the lines of "Feel like I'm going crazy - can't find leggings/hoodie - did you put them away?"

QueenStevie · 25/10/2025 19:11

Ghost.

MadridMadridMadrid · 25/10/2025 19:11

Cleaner does seem the most likely suspect. Assume you've been living with your DP a long time and there have been no previous incidents of things unexpectedly going missing?

MadridMadridMadrid · 25/10/2025 19:17

How long has your cleaner been cleaning for you?

Autumnwave · 25/10/2025 19:25

Froggers.

whatcanthematterbe81 · 25/10/2025 19:34

When we lose stuff the cleaner has always moved it but not stolen it

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 25/10/2025 19:35

They sound like things that could be sold. Is there any possibility the culprit could be one of your DC? Do they get less money than their friends? Or as another poster has suggested, bullying ? Do they have friends in your home? I think you have to ask all your household members and your cleaner if they have seen these things.

RoamingToaster · 25/10/2025 19:38

It seems really strange to steal something on a drier as it’s likely to be missed. I mean not all thieves are clever but you’d think if the cleaner was the thief and they were going to steal something it’d be something tucked away you might not use regularly.

hattie43 · 25/10/2025 19:40

I had things go missing with my cleaner but I found out she brought her daughter with her who turned out to be the magpie . Could this be the same with you . Personally I think it unusual for an adult to take clothes but at a push to sell on Vinted but I can see a necklace going .

MadridMadridMadrid · 25/10/2025 20:17

Does your DP ever get involved in putting the washing away? And, if so, is he good at knowing whose clothes are whose, or do you sometimes find items of your clothing in your DCs' rooms or items of their clothing put away with your stuff?

Eastie77Returns · 25/10/2025 20:33

MadridMadridMadrid · 25/10/2025 20:17

Does your DP ever get involved in putting the washing away? And, if so, is he good at knowing whose clothes are whose, or do you sometimes find items of your clothing in your DCs' rooms or items of their clothing put away with your stuff?

Yes this does happen when he puts the washing away!

So I checked and re-checked DC’s wardrobe and draws and they are definitely not there. The hoodie is quite big and easily spotted and the leggings have a very distinctive pattern. DP recalls they were on the heated dryer in the morning and then gone in the evening and he assumed I put them away.

OP posts:
tuckawaywestteign · 25/10/2025 20:38

I’m afraid we had the exact same situation and didn’t think it could at all be our cleaner as she also did pet sitting for us and we had trusted her to live in our house for a week while we were away. Unfortunately we couldn’t find any other explanation and when we really sat down and thought about when we had last seen items it always correlated with a visit from her. It not only turned out it was her but we found of another family locally she had worked with for 6 years has also had things stolen.

Cherrysoup · 25/10/2025 20:44

Cleaner, sorry. You can ask her where she put them because you saw her take them off the heated airer on the camera. We had to do similar with the dog walker, who we genuinely forgot to tell about the camera. 1st day we re-played to see what time she came, turned out she hadn’t taken him out. 😱 Hasn’t happened again since we mentioned the camera.