When did you know you were done having kids?

[Illprobsregretthis]

Especially if you made the decision to stop at 2, how did you know you were 100% done?! Just looking for experiences of when you knew for sure.

I haven’t, I have one, he has one and we have one between us. I would love another, he doesn’t.
So that’s that, it’s has to be two yes’s. It hurts. But I love DP and our family more than enough to be happy with what we have made between us.

Because I physically can't do it again. I have awful pregnancies and they have got worse each time - HG, constant throwing up, awful pgp and spd. No way can I do it again.

I actually love the baby stage and had it really easy with my 3, but they don't stay babies unfortunately 😁.

Literally about 2 minutes after dc 2 was born. 😂 I always wanted 2 and always said I didn’t want more than that. But I definitely felt a real longing for a second and knew I wasn’t done yet. I had ds and I looked at him after he was born and said to Dh, right then, I’m never doing that again. It was like the curtains came down and the shop was closed. I’ve never had a lasting desire or urge to have another baby since and that was 8 years ago.

This is me as well unfortunately. Sometimes I think how lovely it would be to have a newborn again but of course that stage doesn’t last. Often as I’m running round after the 2 DC we already have, I think to myself there’s just no way we could add another to the mix. I already feel I’m not as good of a mum to two as I was to one because my time and patience have decreased. Unfortunate for DH as he would like another but I can’t see myself changing my mind, I’m enjoying passing milestones and thinking that we never have to do them again!

One and done for me, never had any desire or inclination to have any more children. Really glad I never as she is enough! It was annoying when my DD was younger as people would ask ‘aren’t you going to give her a sibling?’ erm mind your business!

The minute DD was placed in my arms. I looked at her and knew she was our last family member: we’d been waiting for her, she was here, we were done.

She has 3 older brothers who are wonderful.

I had always wanted four: read too many books with groups of 4 siblings and also my best friend growing up was one of four and her home and family were so much more fun and full of love than my, quite sad and lonely, life as an only child.

Never felt any desire for more.

After baby #1, we put our baby stuff back in the loft for #2. After #2, all used baby stuff went out the door. Happy with two, no desire for a third.

Had number 2 and knew then. Never ever get broody.

5 years of secondary infertility, IVF and a really tough pregnancy make me know this will be our last.

When DS was diagnosed with autism and DDs personality began to shine. I didn't have it in me to have another.

Literally as I was pushing DS2 out, my mental chant was "I never have to do this again."

I think some people never feel done, but for me, I've never felt any desire for another since he was born.

That is so hard with an embryo there, and having to make an actual decision with it. My partner is mostly leaning towards done, I don’t feel done. It’s difficult when you’re not on the same page exactly

We decided to have a second when DC1 was about 14 months. We never considered having three, and shortly after DC2 was born we stopped paying to store our frozen embryos and donated them to science (I think for training embryologists), so that made it definite.

I was at a baby shower today and a lot of parents with 2 none of which was on the fence with a 3rd so maybe if your still unsure that’s a sign

I did get broody for a 3rd when dd2 was about 2, but thankfully it fairly soon wore off and never returned.

I’m not sure I felt done as such (although I do now) but at the time I strongly considered how I wanted to raise my children, the level of involvement emotionally and financially, how much I was willing to sacrifice of myself and my marriage and realised 2 was the best balance for us. And all I can say is how much that decision has solidified itself as the right one as the kids have grown, do not underestimate teens, don’t just think about small kids when considering the size of your family.

Turning 40, that was my cut off point.

About half way through pregnancy with DC2. I don't enjoy being pregnant, took bloody ages to get pg with #1, bad PGP both times (from 9 weeks with #2). #2 was premature, birth was car crash and I nearly died, and #2 was in hospital for 2 weeks.
We have both said to each other that if you want more kids, you'll have to find someone else to have them with cos I ain't doing that again. We still have 2, that's plenty for us.

For me, I’m only just coming to the conclusion.
I’ve got 3 DCs, and we suffered the devastating loss of a twin pregnancy about 18 months ago. We’ve made our peace with that loss and decided the risks of another pregnancy are not something we are willing to risk again. I’ve also realised the freedoms I have now my DCs are all a little older, and maybe it sounds selfish, but I don’t want to give up those freedoms and go back to nappies and sleepless nights.
Although I do still see newborns and my ovaries start twitching all over again…..I have to have a word with myself and remember all the reasons why we aren’t doing that again

DH booked himself in for a vasectomy before DC4 and I had been discharged from hospital so the decision was out of my hands really.

I don't think I'll ever be done. We have 2 DC, both are ND and we have no support. I couldn't look after a third person. But every time I look at a baby my heart hurts a bit

As soon as trying for a second became real, I realised it wasn’t what I wanted. The absolute relief at a negative test the one month we tried, and horror at the idea of trying again were a clear sign that I was one and done!

I’d felt that way throughout pregnancy and babyhood (to the point of donating the baby stuff as soon as he was done with it). But when he turned 1, he started nursery and the insidious voices of society telling you kids need siblings got in my head and swayed me. We knew the age gap we wanted (3 years) so I went around thinking we’d have a second for about 18 months because it was an idea not a reality. Then when he was 2.5 it was time to try and reality hit.

Even if had decided on a second, our cut-off would be May this year for conceiving as we wouldn’t want more than a 5.5 year gap.

I had 2 but then split with ex and met dh at 29. We planned for 1 or 2, but we had our son when I was 37 and I k ew I was done. I found it so much harder and didn’t want the stress of 2 under 5