A good answer to "how many asylum seekers do you have living with you?"

[SomersetBrie]

I see this quite a lot in a fairly supportive group I belong to.
Lots of people dispelling the myth that asylum seekers are raking it in, taking jobs and benefits, etc.
A positive space and then someone comes in saying "if you are so supportive of asylum seekers, how many fighting age men do you have living with you?"
It really annoys me! It's possible to be supportive of a cause without actually taking people in.
All I can think of is really rude responses, I'd like something measured and decent and not allow them to get away with shutting people down with that.

(and I know I'll get negative responses to this post, but I will be super grateful to anyone who can come up with something I can use)

What is your actual reason for not having an asylum seeker living with you? Just say that? No need to come on Mumsnet looking for others to explain why you hold the views you do. Only you know that.

The whole point of a social contract is that we agree that there are certain things that a society should do, and one of those is to support human rights and the conventions that protect people with certain characteristics, including refugees. You can't opt in and out, that's what elections are for.

I mean you can't really argue with these people, they just go round in circles. It's not the moral maze is it?

So YOU won't help?

Seems like you want it to be someone's else's problem?

And that's the issue with those types of answers. I was being flippant with my original response, but you can see how easily intentions become meaningless without some sort of real action.

Well it’s the old argument again and again isn’t it, that we know fine well the THOUSANDS of blokes coming in (and already here) aren’t all refugees. And at the last poll (sorry too busy to find it) the majority of the population and buy into the social contract, don’t agree to funding any accommodation for them. They want them gone/deported/whatever.

Nobody knows who you are online, just lie and say you have somebody living with you 🤷‍♀️

This made me laugh but also made me sad my house isn't stuffed with old donkeys.

I have some sympathy with people who ask it actually. Maybe not that exact question, which is clearly designed as a gotcha but similar.

I also often argue on the side of fair treatment for asylum seekers and try to debunk myths about all the free money they get, but the truth is, I wouldn't want to live next door to an HMO of them, would you OP?

Exactly this. It's the stupid person's idea of a clever "gotcha" isn't it.
I don't want 30 5 year olds in my house every day from 9-3 but I still think we should have schools, so I pay my taxes and vote for a party with education policies which most closely align to my own beliefs. Exactly the same with refugees!

How about:
I'd rather not have any fighting age bloke living with me- no matter what country he's from! I'll make a begrudging exception if he's my son, partner or father... Doesn't mean I think all men should be deported!

Whoops didn't mean to quote you (this time) Mrs TP.

Ask them if they are supportive of homeless ex soldiers (there are a lot of them) and if they say yes ask how many do they have living with them.

I don't have a nuclear reactor in my garden but I also want electricity. I don't have a landfill site in my garden but I'd like to dispose of my rubbish. I don't bury my own shit under my patio but I'd like a flushing toilet...

Or the 30 children in my lounge but I want education - a good example!

All these things are services that developed societies have, so that we can progress.

It’s purely a bad faith question to ask about ‘living with you’ when the claimed protest is about:

Illegal immigrants in hotels - they are not illegal, as they have entered into the system
Illegal immigrants on benefits - those who are known to the system enough to get any form of benefit are not illegal

Processed asylum seekers become legal, and need to get a job, find a home etc - those who don’t end up homeless

Illegal immigrants are those who successfully entered via airports etc, or but then overstayed their visas and disappeared, or previously entered in the back of a lorry

There isn’t a sensible answer to the bad faith question

If they change the spin to homeless veterans, then what about the rest of the homeless?

‘Veterans’ have many avenues of support, and it takes about a year to leave the services - some just don’t take the support that is there, others cannot cope and cannot keep themselves
(Note that there are official support routes, authentic charity/other organizations providing support and very many fly by night “For the heroes” fake charities that exploit

Have they wondered why a ‘veteran’ is homeless ? It’s because they cannot fit into society and fall to alcohol, drugs etc
Why worry about the drug addict veteran above the drug addict non veteran?

The solution to both is not a roof over their head, but to help with the underlying issues that caused them to fall out of society

What is their problem with those immigrants in a hotel ? Is it because they think that 4* services continue when a hotel closes to be rented to the Home Office?
Is it because it’s immigrants?
Is it because immigrants are stuck in a system awaiting processing and are not allowed to work, therefore are hanging around with nothing to do except be picked out as ‘outsiders’?

What is their solution - process them properly or just put them out of sight?

What do the objectors do themselves for veteran / general homeless rough sleepers?
Did they accept the homeless shelter being set up down the street or did they protest about that as well ?
Do they complain about the dirty smelly people queuing up outside the church hall for a shower & a meal?
Do they ask for their veterans ID card before they object to their presence?

I think I'd prefer a few asylum seekers to 30 five year olds

Most of the population simply don’t want these men coming in to the country. I don’t see why that’s so hard to accept. They’re men. And they should be fighting the Taliban or whoever the problem is back home.

😂

I don’t understand the question. Why would I have asylum seekers living me?

It's not that clear cut though is it.

I've given a room to a friend in need before now. But I don't have space to do that where I live currently.
And someone I don't know at all would be very different. Whoever they were, wherever they came from.

I always say I support abused children getting removed from their abusive parents.

but it’s fairly obvious I wouldn’t have one living with me. Does that mean they shouldn’t be supported by the state either?

"That would be a really good question if I'd just said we should be forcing random members of the public to accommodate migrants in their homes, but I didn't, you moron."

I mean honestly. "You say we should send murderers to prison, yet you don't have any murderers living on your sofa! I am very clever."

On the one hand it is a silly gotcha (I wouldn't want to have my sister or favourite cousin move in, let alone a stranger).

On the other hand it is a very serious point - Britain is our home and we should be careful who we allow through the front door (or upstairs windows for that matter).

Well I mean they’d have to share my bed for one thing….

for a second thing - there’s no mechanism for random households to be housing asylum seekers outside of the Ukraine scheme. So it’s nonsensical

Might as well ask, why don’t you have Madonna living with you if you like her.

Fortunately we don't have to resort to housing asylum seekers in people's homes because we fund better accommodation. Let's remember they are fleeing war and persecution and I would rather live in a country that offers sanctuary than live in a country that persecutes its own citizens.

There is a mechanism, there’s a charity that will set anyone up. Bed issue aside.

Great question. There are lots of opportunities for volunteers to support asylum seekers - I do this from time to time and have met some great people. It would be nice if more people got involved.