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Original poster

Dd's tutors are saying she absolutely has continue to do this, should I step in?

64 replies

OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 10:41

DD17 is at college studying beauty therapy.

She's almost an adult so in general I don't get too involved with anything other than helping her fund the kits/uniform etc and asking her every day how things are going and being her guinea pig!

She is very much enjoying it and hopes to go onto theatre and special effects make up artistry in the future.

Amongst various treatments, one they practice several times a week are facials. They practice on each other for all the various treatments.

When DD started over a month ago she had fairly clear skin and always did have. Since having these weekly facials her skin has erupted into quite bad acne (the first photo is DD 8 weeks ago, the second is not DD but gives you an idea of how her skin now looks). She has become so upset and depressed as each time she has a facial it triggers more spots.

DD has asked the tutors several times if she can be excused from the facials for a week or two to allow her skin to settle but is told each time absolutely not, that it's part of her course and she must partake. She is happy to carry on giving the facials but just needs this break for her skin (and mental health's) sake. She says the tutor just won't allow her to step back even for a week or two.

She's very low about it and doesn't want to go out as she feels so self conscious.

I'm considering contacting the tutor on Monday and asking her to have reconsider and to give DD a break for a while?

Should I get involved? What would you do?

Dd's tutors are saying she absolutely has continue to do this, should I step in?
Dd's tutors are saying she absolutely has continue to do this, should I step in?
OP posts:
Original poster
OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 10:43

Oh and if anyone can recommend a really good acne treatment that would be great.

OP posts:
user1471538283 · 04/10/2025 10:43

No this stops now. She might be having an allergic reaction to a product. It doesn't make sense that they are making her continue!

Pricelessadvice · 04/10/2025 10:44

That’s what my skin would have done if I’d have put stage make up and stuff on it at that age.
I’m not sure what to suggest other than maybe she could get a GP note to say her skin needs to be kept clear due to severe acne that might end up scarring?

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17 years old
Original poster
OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 10:45

user1471538283 · 04/10/2025 10:43

No this stops now. She might be having an allergic reaction to a product. It doesn't make sense that they are making her continue!

I thought so too. It seems harsh to expect her to continue. If this was a beauty salon and a client's skin erupted like this you wouldn't expect them to come by week after week for the same treatment.

OP posts:
Original poster
OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 10:46

Pricelessadvice · 04/10/2025 10:44

That’s what my skin would have done if I’d have put stage make up and stuff on it at that age.
I’m not sure what to suggest other than maybe she could get a GP note to say her skin needs to be kept clear due to severe acne that might end up scarring?

Yes, we could try that, thanks.

OP posts:
Rhaidimiddim · 04/10/2025 10:47

It could be an allergic reaction. It is certainly a reaction, and not a good one. Tell the tutor she will not be doing the facials in future, then get her to a doctor and get it investigated.

If the tutors kicks off, you can go nuclear and tell them that they are causing her actual harm and that you'll be escalating the matter to their HoD. Or you can suggest that they use this as a teaching moment for their students - "some people don't respond well to facials, and this is how we deal with it".

Largestlegocollectionever · 04/10/2025 10:48

Absolutely help her stand her ground and advocate for this - it’s shocking they’re trying to force her to continue!!!

Original poster
OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 10:52

I'll ring the tutor on Monday. DD says she keeps blaming DD for the break out saying it's either her diet or hormones. She was telling her she probably lives off Monster drinks - bloody cheek!

As you can see from the photo which was taken around August time, she had perfectly clear skin and had never had a facial before starting on the course.

OP posts:
RightOnTheEdge · 04/10/2025 11:01

That's absolutely ridiculous, your poor daughter!

I think I would do as a pp suggests and she should go see her GP and see what they say and maybe get a doctors note.

BlueberryLatte · 04/10/2025 11:04

Oh my goodness, this should definitely stop! I can't believe they would make her continue when she has had this sort of reaction. It worries me that they'd be reckless with clients too and they're setting that example to their tutees. I'd not be happy at all with the college. Surely the first rule of any sort of treatment on someone's skin is stop immediately if they're having a bad reaction?

JFDIYOLO · 04/10/2025 11:08

Oh poor love. Acne can blight young lives at a time when they're just setting out.

I'd had some since I was 12 and it flared at 18 when I went to uni so I turned to the GP and went through quite a lot of treatments.

It's quite possible it's stress related, but also possible she's having a reaction to the products. (See what happening with that deodorant brand recently!)

Advise her to make a GP appointment and explain what's happening. Hopefully they'll be sympathetic and provide a letter saying she must avoid these products (especially if she is prescribed anything).

I'm astonished the college think they can make her continue to do the thing that could be causing her a health issue.

All best for her training & career.

Original poster
OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 11:10

JFDIYOLO · 04/10/2025 11:08

Oh poor love. Acne can blight young lives at a time when they're just setting out.

I'd had some since I was 12 and it flared at 18 when I went to uni so I turned to the GP and went through quite a lot of treatments.

It's quite possible it's stress related, but also possible she's having a reaction to the products. (See what happening with that deodorant brand recently!)

Advise her to make a GP appointment and explain what's happening. Hopefully they'll be sympathetic and provide a letter saying she must avoid these products (especially if she is prescribed anything).

I'm astonished the college think they can make her continue to do the thing that could be causing her a health issue.

All best for her training & career.

Thank you. I will definitely get DD to make a GP appointment and I'll speak with the tutor on Monday. They really can not expect her to carry on having breakout after breakout each week.

OP posts:
Beachtastic · 04/10/2025 11:13

That's outrageous, your poor DD.

It's so annoying how ignorant people are about skin problems, as though they're just a trivial thing that will go away in a minute if you use the right soap or something. Please get a GP note!

CurlyKoalie · 04/10/2025 11:15

How cheeky of this tutor to assume the role of dermatologist and diagnose hormones/ bad diet for this change. I think it's fairly obvious this is a reaction to either the products, the facial procedure or both.Whatever the reason, she needs to stop to see if that makes an improvement. I doubt very much whether being a guinea pig is actually a required part of her course. Ask to see where the exam specification actually says so.
I suspect her tutor says this for the convenience of not having to hire or recruit extra volunteers.
The tutors insistance that she continues when it is causing such obvious harm is a safeguarding issue. I would tell the tutor that and threaten to put an official safeguarding complaint to whoever runs the college she attends. At 17 she is still a minor and the college has to view such a complaint as a priority.
Asking to stop the facials in the circumstances seems such a reasonable request that Amy insistance on a doctor's note would be another sign of the bullying unreasonable stance of the tutor.

TeaBiscuitsNaptime · 04/10/2025 11:15

Yes she needs a break from them or at least a chemical free gentle facial. La Roche pose effeclar is good for acne. I would talk to them again. About what the facial involves at the very least

SimoneHere · 04/10/2025 11:17

They are causing actual physical harm to your DD. It has to stop.

And sorry to say it’s not necessarily something that will clear up quickly once triggered.

murasaki · 04/10/2025 11:20

Poor lass, thats awful and needs to stop. Facial blemishes are a nightmare at that age. I used to have facial eczema, which of course I'd scratch in my sleep, and then feel I needed to cover with make up to go outside which again made it worse. It was a hellish time.

A GP note is a good idea, but I can't believe given they've seen it, they're allowing it to continue. Someone from the college needs to talk to them, she won't have been the only one and I bet kids have dropped out over it.

WatchingTheDetective · 04/10/2025 11:20

I'd send photos in my email. How can she possibly insist on her damaging her skin like that? As a PP said, it should be used as a teaching experience.

sashh · 04/10/2025 11:22

That is not on. The tutor is being an idiot. If someone had gone in to a salon and their skin had reacted like that there is no way that treatment would be repeated.

This is where 'health and safety' comes in handy. Has the tutor done a risk assessment?

Has this been recorded in the incident book?

Why does the tutor think it is whatever? Has she got any evidence?

SliceofTosst · 04/10/2025 11:27

Absolutely stop these. Poor girl. Get a doctor's note.

Original poster
OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 11:34

sashh · 04/10/2025 11:22

That is not on. The tutor is being an idiot. If someone had gone in to a salon and their skin had reacted like that there is no way that treatment would be repeated.

This is where 'health and safety' comes in handy. Has the tutor done a risk assessment?

Has this been recorded in the incident book?

Why does the tutor think it is whatever? Has she got any evidence?

I'll ask her on Monday if she has noted dd's reaction to the product/treatment, I imagine that they have not done this.

OP posts:
ilod · 04/10/2025 11:38

it’s outrageous that they want her to continue having these facials. Would a qualified beauty therapist insist on doing this to a client who had a reaction? It would be crazy and unethical.

Sera1989 · 04/10/2025 11:38

Your poor DD! It is absolutely not the tutor’s job to diagnose her - tutor couldn’t possibly know if it’s diet or hormones! I would definitely mention possible allergy as they can’t force someone to have an allergic reaction. If all else fails I would suggest DD is ill on facial day for a couple of weeks.

As for products, I have used Acnecide cream (benzyl peroxide) and it worked really well but takes a little while and you need a really good moisturiser for the first month or so

sunshineonasunnyday · 04/10/2025 11:41

OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 10:41

DD17 is at college studying beauty therapy.

She's almost an adult so in general I don't get too involved with anything other than helping her fund the kits/uniform etc and asking her every day how things are going and being her guinea pig!

She is very much enjoying it and hopes to go onto theatre and special effects make up artistry in the future.

Amongst various treatments, one they practice several times a week are facials. They practice on each other for all the various treatments.

When DD started over a month ago she had fairly clear skin and always did have. Since having these weekly facials her skin has erupted into quite bad acne (the first photo is DD 8 weeks ago, the second is not DD but gives you an idea of how her skin now looks). She has become so upset and depressed as each time she has a facial it triggers more spots.

DD has asked the tutors several times if she can be excused from the facials for a week or two to allow her skin to settle but is told each time absolutely not, that it's part of her course and she must partake. She is happy to carry on giving the facials but just needs this break for her skin (and mental health's) sake. She says the tutor just won't allow her to step back even for a week or two.

She's very low about it and doesn't want to go out as she feels so self conscious.

I'm considering contacting the tutor on Monday and asking her to have reconsider and to give DD a break for a while?

Should I get involved? What would you do?

No way would I let that continue! I second the doctors note.

In terms of treatment, having gone from quite bad skin to absolutely adoring my skin, Treclin. It has majorly improved my skin and confidence. It includes an anti biotic that reduces bacteria, decreases inflammation and promotes skin cell turnover.

Original poster
OutinmyMoHo · 04/10/2025 11:56

sunshineonasunnyday · 04/10/2025 11:41

No way would I let that continue! I second the doctors note.

In terms of treatment, having gone from quite bad skin to absolutely adoring my skin, Treclin. It has majorly improved my skin and confidence. It includes an anti biotic that reduces bacteria, decreases inflammation and promotes skin cell turnover.

Show quote history

Can you buy this in shops or online or is it prescription only?

OP posts:
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