Moments that changed you life forever?

[Seeyouincourtkeith]

A few weeks ago my Daughters best friend was tragically killed at the age of 19. I know our lives have changed forever and my perception of the world will never be the same. I have ended an 8 year toxic relationship that I had clung onto but now I just think fuck it life is way to short for this sort of shit.

My other one is the phone ringing at 5am to tell me to get to the hospital as my Dad had taken a turn for the worse, I knew he was gone before I even got there and he was.

What was yours?

Being sued repeatedly by my own mother across a period of of 3yrs on multiple vexatious items across different courts, inc social services. Won/ lost some but all entirely unnecessary and caused me PTSD and ruined my time with one of my babies.

my husband had had financial anxiety ever since. Her goal was to split us up and take my children and home. We ‘won’ but I’ve never seen any of my family again except 1 aunt and lost relations either my siblings and wider family,

the day of the last case I stared at a lift going out of the court then tried to drink myself to death, luckily survived. I didn’t know how I could mother, when my own mother was a sociopath. But I could and had extensively pscyhotherapy (trauma rewind) and slowly recovered.

having 5 sudden unexpected deaths in a year including having to turn off dh brother life support after he had a heart attack makes you realise life is for living and not to put things off

in the midst of that awful year taking dm to get the bank to get her statements and dm telling me dsis who had always been a nightmare with money had taken £10k out in 6 months stupidly tried to have a civil conversation with them both that she could get in trouble deprivation of assets etc dsis had already spoken to dm convinced her she had forgotten and dm said she was happy for her to have the money so i left it dsis had previously asked me as joint poa to do an equity release on dm house i refused. Dsis then blocked me had the locks changed on dm house had dm removed me as poa so I then reported to opg who to a year to assign it to an investigator an equity release was taken out on dm house i believe according to dm as I was still in contact with her then the money went to dsis and when i asked if she had changed her will she implied she had as her money should go to dsis who is caring for her I had been excluded so obviously could no longer care for her. Dm then stopped letting me in the house was nice enough on the doorstep but not invited in I couldn’t question her as it would be recorded on the newly fitted ring doorbell that goes straight to dsis phone

the house then gets cleared and rented out I saw the sign someone spotted dm in the local care home who refused to confirm it was her so ss had to be involved and have confirmed it’s her I am yet to visit her. I should of not mentioned anything to dsis should of gone straight to the police as I have lost my family and family friends who now don’t speak to us as they believe whatever lies dsis has told them about why we are nc opg were useless dm apparently had capacity although i believe she was isolated from the rest of her family coerced and manipulated ss services cant over rule opg apparently and police are to busy ringing me after my dsis reported twice once when a family friend my neighbour blocked her when i gave a very brief description of my we are nc i was warned not to speak to people do everything by text to have it in writing and the second time when the opg investigator told me to email her contact details to the letting agency as she would be in touch with them which was in writing as the police advised me the first time

Finding out my brother in law was a paedophile when he’d been having regular contact with my children for years. And the realisation that my PIL and SIL had known all along and hid it from DH and I.

When I was 8, my mum left my dad overnight and moved us, me and 2 siblings, in with a new man she met, 100 miles away. She's a narcissist, he turned out to be abusive, but that act got us out of the bleak town we lived, on a rough estate with nothing of our own.
We moved to a picturesque town in a beautiful place, we'd never been anywhere like it. They're now divorced but we stayed here (on to her next husband). If I hadn't seen the life I could have, I'm sure I'd have ended up still living on that estate. I go back and see how the lives of my friends when I was a child have turned out and I'm so grateful for everything I now have.
I went to a better school, saw my friends parents with their professional careers etc. I wanted that for myself, went to uni, qualified. I also met my husband here, we bought our first house age 22 and now live in a lovely home with our 2 beautiful children.
When I go back it hits me hard how lucky I am, and how my mum's fling changed my life trajectory.

And the icing on the cake is according to ss dm who is in the ritz of a care home obviously despite everything I love her dearly and want her to be well cared for she is NHS funded no idea how dsis wangled that one when dm house was worth £600k before she bled the savings dry and took out the equity release I believe to be £35k as an ex care home manager now benefits assessor it doesn’t surprise me but it’s infuriating how it’s not even affecting her precious inheritance she threw me my dc under the bus to get and ruined my relationship with dm and family members and friends for

i suppose i should be proud rather than angry me and dh have raised our dc and everything we have and achieved it through our own hard work we have never had a penny of dm money unlike dsis who has been bailed out all her adult life and we are despite dc now being young adults are very close when dm passes dsis who is single never married or had dc is on her own except for the friends she lies to and is unfortunately in poor health herself

@Seeyouincourtkeith I’m glad your DD has your support through this. It really does make a difference even though she might not fully realise it right now. My DM told me years later how much it actually affected her as a parent too as obviously with something like meningitis we had the risk of more of us getting it while coming to terms with how sudden everything was as well. I’m sure it must have affected the teachers quite a lot as well but of course we didn’t think of that at the time.

My Dad being diagnosed with a brain tumour and dying less than a year later. He was 58.

Finding out I was pregnant at 37 when I genuinely believed I was infertile. Completely unplanned pregnancy. My teen is an absolute diamond.

Spotting my husband with an OW & realising something was up.

Less happily - messaging a FB friend and flirting, not knowing he was married. He responded enthusiastically and we had a 8 month affair before he just ghosted me. Had my heart splattered all over the county, deservedly so. That was 6 years ago and I still think about him every day.

The moment I worked out that my beautiful daughter had developed the hideous disease that is anorexia and then was admitted to an inpatient unit for a year. Changed our whole family. Life is still very hard.

My best friend dying when I was 13 .I grew up instantly and the way I saw the world changed. Affected all my relationships and my ability to form friendships/ get close to others throughout my life.
On a more positive note, walking into a random bar on holiday and meeting the boy who became DH.Been together 28 years.

My exdh lost his rag over a saucepan, 10 years of his emotional, financial and sexual abuse and I walked out because he had a go at me for putting a saucepan on the wrong ring. 25 years later I’m living in my dream home, married with wonderful dc and my dh couldn’t be more different from my ex. I sometimes think my ex made me the woman I am today, sometimes I think I should thank him

My life changed when i gave no fucks what others thought.
Being me and loving it sleeping around and love it.
Being single and never want to change it.
Not letting my awful past define my future i cant change it but i can have the most amazing times now.

Finding my 21 year old daughter dead on the toilet floor, 10 months ago.
i will never be the same person I was before her death.

My only sibling killed himself 18 months ago. Changed our family dynamic completely and turned our lives upside down. None of us will ever be the same again.

Probably when my dad died suddenly when I was a teen - life woud have been very different had he not passed away. And I don't mean it would have been better! Def changed the trajectory of my life in many ways. It was a bit of a sliding doors moment for sure.

Becoming step mother and full time mummy to three children aged almost four and under after their mother died. I later had two of my own and all are now lovely adults. A very sad time that changed my life forever but for the better.

My husband dying suddenly when he was 52.

LoudPlumDog · Today 14:22

Finding my 21 year old daughter dead on the toilet floor, 10 months ago.
i will never be the same person I was before her death.

Im so, so sorry💐

I'll go with a happy one. My neighbour knocking on my door to tell me there was a leak from my flat into his. Would not have our wonderful children if not for that leak! Many years later, we are separated on good terms.

Oh goodness, I am so sorry. 💐

Opening a letter from my husband’s colleague’s husband asking if I had any suspicions that they were having an affair. Almost 23 years of love, stability, happiness, hopes and dreams completely shattered. I had no idea whatsoever. My whole world is in pieces now.

My heart attack last year. It came out of the blue and was quite serious apparently (although tbh it didn't feel like it at all). I was rushed straight through to the Cath Lab for a stent. Before I was carefree and very optimistic now I don't get excited about future events and am scared of my own mortality.

Deciding to keep the baby. Pregnancy wasn't planned, boyfriend was very controlling. Ended up leaving him and raising her as a solo parent for the last 6 years. Happiest I've ever been.