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Just a list of shit going on in my life right now

47 replies

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 13:50

— Living in a 1 bed flat while our house purchase takes forever to go through

My dad has got stage 2 cancer recently diagnosed. He is with a narcissistic gold digger and has decided to cut me and my children off because I don’t want to be around someone like that. Both myself and dh have been blocked. We was really close.

My dsd has fell out with her mum again because of arguments about college and benefits money.

My sister is a raving alcoholic and has this morning been arrested for attacking her boyfriend in front of her 15 year old.

My mum has got a new bf all of a sudden who’s got 6 kids !!!

I literally can’t cope anymore if I don’t laugh i’ll cry.

send help, seriously

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 13:57

How many of you in a one bed flat op?

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:07

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 13:57

How many of you in a one bed flat op?

5!! The two toddlers still sleep with us though in the bed so we’re making it work for now, should hopefully only be until October now 🤞

OP posts:
peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:08

I am autistic and all this is too much for my head to cope with.

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:10

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:07

5!! The two toddlers still sleep with us though in the bed so we’re making it work for now, should hopefully only be until October now 🤞

And what about step children?

childofthe607080s · 04/09/2025 14:11

Help? 🍫

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:12

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:10

And what about step children?

Just the one, she lives with her mum

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:13

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:12

Just the one, she lives with her mum

And never stays? Or only currently?

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:13

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:12

Just the one, she lives with her mum

Doesn’t visit ever due to not wanting too so we go and see her every couple of weeks/months and take her out for a meal. We’ve recently came back from abroad with her too before I get jumped on, I know what Mumsnet can be like !

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:13

And cutting you off is on your father and no one else OP

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:14

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:13

And never stays? Or only currently?

Doesn’t stay anymore due to having a bf and wanting to be with him and friends, see my earlier post

OP posts:
peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:14

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:13

And cutting you off is on your father and no one else OP

Yes I know he has to be held responsible. He’s very naive though, also autistic

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:14

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:13

Doesn’t visit ever due to not wanting too so we go and see her every couple of weeks/months and take her out for a meal. We’ve recently came back from abroad with her too before I get jumped on, I know what Mumsnet can be like !

she doesn’t want to visit? Why?
and why are you getting stressed about her relationship with her mother when you hardly see the girl?

And your DH pays maintenance for his ex having 100% of the nights?

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:17

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:14

she doesn’t want to visit? Why?
and why are you getting stressed about her relationship with her mother when you hardly see the girl?

And your DH pays maintenance for his ex having 100% of the nights?

Because I care about her ? Sorry but how has this turned into me being challenged about child maintenance? 😂

OP posts:
crackofdoom · 04/09/2025 14:18

OK, I get you. There's the myth going round that autistic people don't have empathy, which couldn't be more wrong. We DO have empathy- we often empathise MORE strongly than other people- we just don't show it in the way that NT people expect us to.

I think you're taking on everybody else's problems as if they're your own, which is leaving you absolutely overwhelmed.

You're going to have to work out how to detach from your mum's, sister's and DSD's problems. Sure, provide a shoulder to cry on from time to time, but they're not YOUR problems.

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:19

crackofdoom · 04/09/2025 14:18

OK, I get you. There's the myth going round that autistic people don't have empathy, which couldn't be more wrong. We DO have empathy- we often empathise MORE strongly than other people- we just don't show it in the way that NT people expect us to.

I think you're taking on everybody else's problems as if they're your own, which is leaving you absolutely overwhelmed.

You're going to have to work out how to detach from your mum's, sister's and DSD's problems. Sure, provide a shoulder to cry on from time to time, but they're not YOUR problems.

Thank you so much !! I hate that myth, if anything im
too empathetic!

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:19

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:17

Because I care about her ? Sorry but how has this turned into me being challenged about child maintenance? 😂

Not you
your husband
and I’m guessing the answer is… no

OrangeSmoke · 04/09/2025 14:23

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:19

Not you
your husband
and I’m guessing the answer is… no

So why are you having a go at the OP, who was not asking for sympathy for her husband?

Sorry you're going through a rough time, @peppapigoinkoinkk , your family sounds...complex and I think you need to leave them to it to sort their own shit out.

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:26

@SorejawsYou can presume all you like, and you will never get a definitive answer out of me because this is not what my post is about. I was posting for some support because everyone in my life atm is a mess apart from my dh but he hears enough of it.
So thank you for your ‘concern’ but please bow out now.

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 14:27

OrangeSmoke · 04/09/2025 14:23

So why are you having a go at the OP, who was not asking for sympathy for her husband?

Sorry you're going through a rough time, @peppapigoinkoinkk , your family sounds...complex and I think you need to leave them to it to sort their own shit out.

Edited

Having a go?!
asking

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 14:27

@OrangeSmokeThank you. Yes I’ve had a rough childhood but met an amazing man who has been my rock, I just hate being the person everyone turns too with their issues because I really do take it all on and it makes me feel ill.

OP posts:
peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 16:59

So anyway, I was going to ask why some people tend to have one thing after another happen to them at a certain period in their life ? Like is there something in the water making everyone go loopy?

OP posts:
peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 17:59

Just need to talk

OP posts:
crackofdoom · 04/09/2025 18:56

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 16:59

So anyway, I was going to ask why some people tend to have one thing after another happen to them at a certain period in their life ? Like is there something in the water making everyone go loopy?

No, it's just natural for things to happen in clusters.

I spent several years thinking "Well, this is all going suspiciously smoothly, isn't it!". Then over the last few months I've had an awful scenario where I've had to repay thousands in council tax I didn't know I owed, my oldest friend has been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and the teenager has been kicking off horribly...

Vitriolinsanity · 04/09/2025 19:56

Would this help:

1 Your Dad. Terrible news, but nothing you can do.

2 DSD has to be your husband’s problem. She has 2 able parents to shoulder her problems in the short term. Sympathetic ear to DH.

3 your sister is an adult, but the priority is her child which is probably the only if these problems you could in any way help with

4 your mother is also an adult. Leave her to her own drama.

So, that leaves you with your awful, but temporary housing. October is 26 days away. There is light! Also your nephew, who is the only one of all the above who really needs support.

peppapigoinkoinkk · 04/09/2025 20:25

crackofdoom · 04/09/2025 18:56

No, it's just natural for things to happen in clusters.

I spent several years thinking "Well, this is all going suspiciously smoothly, isn't it!". Then over the last few months I've had an awful scenario where I've had to repay thousands in council tax I didn't know I owed, my oldest friend has been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and the teenager has been kicking off horribly...

They say it comes in 3s don’t they, but I’ve had about 6 now 😆
It sounds like you’ve had an awful time lately too, I’m very sorry to hear about your friend.

OP posts: