What's up with the famous 1 bed flats in the UK

[Bathingforest]

I'm from a country where whole families in town live in 1 bed flat, the parents have the living room, the kids the bedroom.

Since when and why English people are so dismissive of such lifestyle...people work for their food, bills and clothing. What gives you a right to mock them.

whole families are living in one room in temporary accommodation.
not everyone can afford to buy a one bedroom flat.
landlords won’t rent one bedroom flats to a whole family.
you are talking utter shite!

One bed flats in thd uk are really variable. We have a few that are amazing huge over the shop type places. Tinsy tiny new builds, crap HMO type places or temporary built after the war social housing.

Nothing wrong with living small. Having no room for “stuff” when DS was a baby meant my mental health was much better than friends who had too many choices , washing, cleaning tasks as well as a new born.

But it shouldn't be considered poverty. Or 'slum housing'. Thats the OP's point. I agree with her.

Landlords won't rent if it is considered overcrowding. Thats causing a huge issue for people who can only afford a one bed flat - have you seen the prices for rentals?. They are having to lie, or live in temporary or become homeless.

Hahaha who upset you today?

Really living in a 1 bedroom flat with multiple children sharing one room while the parents live in the living is not poverty, it’s beautiful and connecting 😂

Because the only two options are to live in a McMansion like your “brother” where he never sees his kids or a family of 5 that live in a 1 bedroom flat. You’re hilarious.

I am a bit confused by this. I live in England and whole families also live in one bed flats here too.

I dont think they are mocked or looked down on. I think its not seen as something to aspire too and a sign of hardship.

When we left my ex, DS and I shared a one bed flat. We shared a double bed (4'6") in a 10' x 7' room. It was cramped and uncomfortable. It was difficult to get enough sleep - DS(3) starfished when asleep.

I kept the sitting room clear for eating at a table, reading & relaxing. Teaching my ds table manners. We stayed a year. Then we moved to a house with space and sufficient bedrooms.

Nothing wrong with a one bed flat if that is what your budget dictates. Being able to afford more space, I prefer to give my son (now 17) some privacy, the ability to respect each other's space, room to eat properly, and a guest bedroom.

Why is it weird for children to have their own rooms? Especially when they're a different sex?

You can live in a 1 bed or 6 bed, it is your choice dependent upon budget.

Generalising, but I think the majority prefer to use living rooms as living rooms and not bedrooms.

OP, how you choose to configure your home layout is down to you.

I do in all honesty raise an eyebrow when someone with 2 kids stays in a dreadful situation because she can’t rent a 3 bedder immediately . I always think it can’t be that dreadful or I would just get out asap and make do with a2 bedder or a really big 1 bedder if necessary and lie!

Maybe, but the country I immediately thought of was Russia, where it is very cold. Not a poor country, but parents sleeping in the living rooms is apparently the norm in Moscow.

Ok so no one will argue against this because it entitles you to a bigger property. But actually brothers and sisters in households that let kids be kids, know there sibling has different genitalia and it doesn’t matter. Why would a brother more than a younger sister react differently to a period ? Having grown up with boys it’s not the difference it needs to be unless it’s encouraged.

I'd say giving a teenage girl her privacy from her brother, especially when she's on her period, is really important! Siblings of the same sex are fair enough, and mixed sex up until puberty. Also kids need their own space! I cherished my bedroom as both a child and a teen, and I shared with my sister until I was 14.

It’s estimated from research that around 5% of children have suffered sibling sexual abuse. Anything that can sensibly be done (like having separate bedrooms) to lower the risk is a good thing.

The NSPCC says that wherever possible children over 10 should have their own rooms, especially where they are of different sexes.

Warm countries aren't always wealthy countries. Many Syrians live in cramped conditions in tiny apartments without balconies or parks for their kids to play in. No air conditioning for the summer or heating for the bitterly cold winters.

My post isn't about wealthy but working people who make ends meet and living without a living room is a thing in many countries. You just eat in the kitchen and for guests open an extendable table in the parents bedroom

I'm sure that if that's what you're used to @Bathingforest then it works just fine. Entertaining on a fold out table in a bedroom just isn't something people normally do in the UK. Are you saying that is wrong?

The way you started this thread, it’s just come out of nowhere.

English people are so dismissive of such lifestyle...people work for their food, bills and clothing. What gives you a right to mock them

Who is mocking? Where? Don’t just accuse people of doing this.

Nothing wrong with living in a one or two bed with children, so why are you saying that’s what ‘we’ (Mumsnetters? English people? UK people?) have said? Where?

It may be difficult and take time but working people can change jobs and improve their circumstances and thus rent (or buy) a larger property.

You are all presumably aware of the tiny house movement? People choosing to live smaller and simpler for the freedom of it all. British culture is undeniably that big space is better/aspirational, and small is bad and borderline archaic. I don't think its true. I think there are many ways to live that are just as good and in some ways better than the traditional family of 5 in a 4 bed semi. I don't think kids need their own rooms and I think they benefit from all piling in together. Some of the happiest and most connected families I have seen live small and simple. Personally Ive done it all with 4 kids. I prefer small. We all do. Its fine if its not for you, but I think its undeniable that OP has a point as this thread has shown.

Oh come on -- we do! Literally housing officers think a one bed flat with a family is overcrowding and won't hand it out to them either via social housing or private rent. So officially we don't think its acceptable, and we don't culturally.

Housing Officers have to abide by the law re amount of people/children and the number of bedrooms.

My point was the was the OP wrote is as if there has been an argument somewhere and she is coming back with another point to make. What argument? Where?

Since when and why English people are so dismissive of such lifestyle...people work for their food, bills and clothing. What gives you a right to mock them.

Are we dismissive? Where? On which thread? Are we mocking them? Again, where and which thread? This gets people’s backs up, being accused of something out of the blue in an angry tone.

I agree that most people could get by in much smaller homes. Was that what OP wanted to say? Why start a thread with angry words then? That’s not going to get the best discussion going is it? It’s another example of the incessant rudeness all over this site.

This by @SeaAndStars is such a good point ’It's one thing to travel around Australia in a caravan with your family - quite another drying the washing for a family of five in a one bed flat on a wet February Tuesday in Hull’. I’ve lived in one room with four of us, in a warmer country. My friends lived seven people in one room in a warmer country. As soon as the sun was up, the doors were opened and people spread out and they weren’t sitting in one room trying to dodge the wet laundry all day. There is a limit to what people should have to live like when you live in a wet country such as the UK.

I've seen here people mocking divorced men that they now will have their sorry ass in one bed flat , not my words, after they divorce, given she's the higher earner.

Second example the autistic dad saying his ex is wrong to send the child to the gran who has 1 bed flat

There are 100s of posts mocking people using 1 bed flats as accommodation or making that sound like it's form of a hell

It's just a house like any other