Have you ever known someone who committed a serious crime?

[TheGhostsOfMeAndYou]

I’ve been listening to a true crime podcast recently and it got me thinking. One of the episodes was about Fred and Rose West. When Fred was first arrested (at the stage where police had only uncovered three bodies in the garden), his brother and sister-in-law spoke about him and said they couldn’t believe he’d done what he was accused of, as he had always seemed so gentle and polite spoken.

It made me wonder — has anyone here ever known someone who’s committed a serious crime, and did it come as a total shock? Or were there warning signs in hindsight? Did you ever suspect anything at the time? And how did others around them react — was it disbelief, or did some say they weren’t surprised?

Someone I vaguely knew jailed for murder with a very short term. What could not come out in court coverage because it would have identified a SA victim was that the person he killed had abused his daughter. He was really rough and it was no surprise he took things into his own hands.

And very few sexual assaults / rapes are reported, and of the ones that are, few are brought to court with even less convictions.

Sexual assault is pretty well a free crime despite the utter devastation it causes.

My best mate became very friendly with her neighbour a few years ago. They were pleasant enough on the surface but I was concerned that they were quite obsessive and OTT about my friend.

It took a while for my mate to have the same concerns, at which point she confides that the neighbour had a conviction for violent attempted murder of a close relative (relative was sleeping at the time, neighbour on Class As).

It was very clear there was something radically off about them but I was fairly gobsmacked at just how bad it was. Thankfully neighbour was in the throes of moving to another part of the country at that point.

I have worked with cared for children for over 30 years, several have been imprisoned for murder or manslaughter, and many have (or are) done time for drug, theft, robbery, battery, ABH, GBH, assault etc. sadly several have also been murdered, mostly young women by men/partners, one quite famously murders by a serial killer. Some were newsworthy murders, others just local press reports.

I'd worked with a guy for years then found out he was from hundreds of miles away but had to relocate after serving 7 years due to flipping out on discovering his wife of 30 years in bed with his best friend or 45 years. He'd hurt his (ex)best friend incredibly badly with various implements. He'd been very happily married for many years with grown up kids (he wasn't young) and the discovery sent him into hyperspace, he flipped.

I felt quite sorry for him actually. He was really nice, hard worker, sang all day. Still massively missed his previous happy family life incredibly.

I suppose we never know how we might act when faced with our worst nightmare.

Someone I used to live with was involved in a huge drug bust in Bali and was all over the national papers.

I know two and I don't mix in unusually criminal circles. One was a neighbour, the other was someone I was on first name terms with. The first got a community sentence, the second had a cache of CSA images so huge I think the judge had to send him down. Plus he was distributing. 🤮

This pair, as disgusting as they are, bother me slightly less than the ones I don't know I know. The law has caught up with them. But what about the others?

Yes 2 people both in “position of trust” professions which require DBS. Now both on the SOR. Not connected to each other. Both male and both came as a total shock. Both with access to extremely vulnerable people.

My cousin is a pedophile

He always had a 'vibe' about him that I didn't like even as a child

He likes 'em old enough to bleed' (he wrote that in some pervert chatroom,he likes them 12-14,slim,blonde and in school uniform)

Fucking disgusting bastard

Oddly,my while family have stood by him and so have his wife and (now adult) dds as 'anyone can make a mistake' and '13 isn't that far off 16' (I mean,really?there's a world of difference)

They even went to court to support him and throw evil glares and snide comments at these brave young girls

He worked at Morrisons (and got fired for trying to chat up young girls) so became a bus driver and that's where he'd go sniffing around for his 'fresh meat' (again,not my words but his)

I'm the nc scapegoat who can't do anything right but I've never abused anyone!

I don't 🤷‍♀️

Sister of BF wanted us to put up her new squeeze because she didn't have room and he had nowhere to stay. Came home one day to finds police everywhere - he had been masquerading as a doctor and carrying out operations on women.

I knew a guy in college a friend at the time really fancied him and went out with him. Very charming and good looking from a wealthy family. He later went to jail for swindling many people including friends of his out of thousands of pounds. He pretended to invest it but he just bought himself fancy cars. He didn’t even attempt to invest it. Then years later a new friend (friend of the original friend ironically) was talking of someone who had swindled her husband out of 10s of thousands and they’d to sell their house and live a much reduced life and I said was it ….. ? And it was. Very odd coincidence.

Changed my name for this. DH has a childhood friend who was always a great guy, I got to know him in my later teens, came to our wedding and would visit DH’s family when back in the area visiting his own. He was accused and found guilty of murder. He has always denied it and most people who know him could not believe it. There were a number of irregularities in the trial eg missing evidence and other evidence mysteriously appearing somewhere it couldn’t have been. However an expert witness for a trusted institution gave evidence that made him look bad. That institution’s reputation is now in the gutter and he’s still in jail. I have no inside knowledge about his guilt or innocence but it makes me really uncomfortable that it isn’t being looked into again.

When I was 16 I came home from boarding school for Christmas and found out that my first "boyfriend" from Y8 had stabbed 10 people at a Halloween party. It's still bizarre to think about two decades later. He wasn't a happy kid when I knew him but it was difficult to imagine him being violent.

A guy I went to school with (turned out to be my husband’s cousin also) killed his baby.

He was a secret alcoholic. We know the extent of the babies injuries. They died in hospital. He refuses to say what happened. Says he can’t remember.

The is CCTV of him going to the shop for alcohol and the baby would have been home alone and injured.

The mum wasn’t even gone that long she was taking a relative home. Maybe 30 minutes.

I went to secondary school and was part of a large friendship group with a lad who went onto stalk an ex girlfriend and stab her 75 times. Some of the people from the friendship group still visit him in prison. He was very popular and funny but had eyes that could bore into your soul.

Found out I was at a BBQ with a now convicted murderer. She was a friend of my exs mums best mate but got invited to things on the odd occasion. they were shocked and I still don’t believe they think she did it, me and my ex on the other hand do but more because she went through court and got found guilty.

One of my neighbours in the early 90’s he had been in prison as his girlfriends baby had been shaken to death, they blamed each other so neither had a long sentence.

he used to park his car in the car park of the flats where I lived, he didn’t live in the flats and shouldn’t have parked there, he was told many times not to park there but he didn’t give a shit and carried on parking in the end bay next to a patch of grass. I used to let my dog shit on the grass and didn’t pick it up as he regularly trod in it and trod it into his car. Small things.

He was then sent back to prison for committing armed robbery against a rural post office. He used the same car, the police probably followed the smell.

Thankfully I can’t think of anyone that I know.

Off on a bit of a tangent but when we were sitting GCSEs a boy a couple of years younger than us went missing and was found murdered in a derelict building. A boy that we knew well and regularly socialised with was arrested for his murder and held in custody for a number of months which meant he missed all his exams. We were interviewed by police and while we all started off insisting he couldn’t have done it, most of us started to believe he probably had. It wasn’t him and sadly the boy was the first victim of a serial killer that went on to kill 3 more boys.

A man my DMil worked with and was friendly with married a Thai woman later in life and murdered her. He was a very mild mannered man, who mostly kept to himself outside of work- as a result her death wasn't discovered until sometime later.

The Mum of a girl DS was friendly with at playgroup was convicted of being a paedophile. A man from my own workplace was accused of the same (he committed suicide before the trial).

My siuation was the same as yours.

Late 70’s worked briefly with a lad who went on to become a con man & fleece a lot of women out of a lot of money. He went to prison a few times, doubt if he’s mended his ways.

All sorts.

someone blows a house up with a grenade. One multiple international drug dealers. Multiple murders. More common than you’d think.

I know someone who turned out to be a paedophile.

There were lots of signs that he wasn’t a great person: lazy, compulsive liar, selfish, over confident, sly. But no indication of anything more, it was a huge shock when we found out.