Have you ever known someone who committed a serious crime?

[TheGhostsOfMeAndYou]

I’ve been listening to a true crime podcast recently and it got me thinking. One of the episodes was about Fred and Rose West. When Fred was first arrested (at the stage where police had only uncovered three bodies in the garden), his brother and sister-in-law spoke about him and said they couldn’t believe he’d done what he was accused of, as he had always seemed so gentle and polite spoken.

It made me wonder — has anyone here ever known someone who’s committed a serious crime, and did it come as a total shock? Or were there warning signs in hindsight? Did you ever suspect anything at the time? And how did others around them react — was it disbelief, or did some say they weren’t surprised?

Not convicted of a crime (( yet )) but it's just come out one of my workmates has been sexually touching and making inappropriate comments to colleagues.

In all honesty he'd have been the last person we'd even think of doing this, really lovely guy and we all admired him for being so determined to give his kids a better life (( trainee teacher who was an immigrant from a third world country ))

The whole things just sad. Sad for his wife and kids who may not able to stay in the UK now without his status, sad for the women who were made to feel uncomfortable, sad for my manager who's lovely and now has to deal with this and the implosion it's going to have outside of work.

My husband knew someone fairly well who murdered 2 men, it made national news / tv documentary.
I won't go into detail, it was drug related which didn't surprise my husband ,but he didn't expect him to commit murder.
Someone i know (again no details) had a family member by marriage commit a double murder, shocked their family to the core .
Both myself and my husband live very quiet lives with no family drama !
Interesting thread but quite sad when you think of the destruction caused by some of these terrible crimes.

I have taught several. Murderers, rapists, paedophiles and those who have committed serious assault.
Scary.

Years ago a guy at our company murdered his wife. Everyone was stunned as he was so lovely and you would never have guessed he'd be capable.

Yes.The first a close relative of a work colleague, wealthy self made business man but actually a huge fraudster, think national headlines in the press and on TV, following the case day by day. The second the brother of an old friend who appeared to be a nice guy, married, kids, perfect life. Also a rapist. Both got lengthy and much deserved prison sentences.

I know a murderer whose crime attracted national media attention. It was absolutely bizarre to find out what had happened and then see the people involved all over the news.

I also know a rapist. I was there on the night the crime was committed and there's no doubt at all that he did it - the victim was paralytically drunk, extremely young and very vulnerable. I couldn't believe it at the time because I really trusted him. He was convicted and his family and friends spent years campaigning for his release on the basis that there had been a huge miscarriage of justice. They were convinced he was a lovely guy and would never do such a thing.

They really do walk among us

A quarter of people and a third of men have a criminal record? I find that very hard to believe. I assume you mean adults but is it worldwide or a particular region. What is the source of those figures?

Lots actually.

a pedophile who abused countless children including his own. Long sentence but out now. He ruined many lives but apparently free to walk amongst us. Knew him well. Not a nice man but no idea of what he was doing.

another a murderer. Life sentence knew him only a bit but friend of his family. Prison for years. Was always nice and polite to me

another murderer female known her for decades. It was a shock. She will be locked up for a long time. She has children

an attempted murder charge for another. Got a life sentence. Someone I know since birth. Big shock for everyone. His family devastated

one was on crime watch

lots of others too. No notorious ones like rose west but serious criminal cases. Too many to list here.

I know an arsonist and bank robber who ‘found God’ while in prison; he was released and became a minister. He married, had a family. Then protected his brother who had sexually abused his two daughters. He still preaches in church and lives outwardly as a good Christian man who people greatly admire. He has an OBE or CBE. His family who are all aware of his misdemeanours are still close with him (including the two daughters and several grandchildren)

Yes - I worked with a really nice guy ( adult social worker) who, along with his boyfriend, did an armed robbery. No-one could believe it , we were in shock. Turned out they had money trouble and saw it as a way out. Gun wasn’t real but still it must have been very scary for the shop assistant . They were easily found by police as they ordered the masks on eBay then sent photos to friends of them wearing them !!

Do you know, I've no idea. Ho hum.

When I found out a close friend had been charged with child sexual abuse, my first reaction was that there was no way he could have done it. He had done many tremendously good things in his life, for me and for others. He was a tireless defender of people who were misunderstood and/or who needed help, such as the harmless mentally ill homeless man who used to hang out near our office. As far as I could guess from the detailed newspaper report, my friend was acquitted on a technicality because the prosecutor was incompetent. But the community turned against him. He disappeared.

As the weeks and months passed, my mind kept putting things together. There had been many tiny unexplained incidents which I couldn't have been expected to figure out, but which all made sense if one assumed he was an abuser. It was like an intricately plotted mystery novel.

For example, he'd always seemed to carry a lot of guilt despite all his good deeds. When I'd asked him about that, he explained it away as the consequence of growing up gay in an intolerant religious community, but I'd never really believed that account: by the time I met him he was surrounded by supportive people who loved him, but with every year he seemed to feel worse about himself, not better. Now I think he was too weak to stop abusing children, but was so ashamed of what he was doing that he thought he could atone for it somehow through his other actions.

There were other, clearer clues as well. Individually they would have been easy to explain in other ways, but taken together they all pointed to him having been an abuser.

I went to uni with a man who raped and murdered a fellow student on campus.

I worked with a guy who gave a child protection course for the nspcc who turned out to be a serial child abuser.

I was married to a psycho (later diagnosed) who tried to kill me. Luckily he failed because the police turned up on time.

Yes. Someone I sat next to at school for years committed murder. I was terrified of them during school. Also, a family friend (a policeman) was convicted of child porn/online offences.

My childhood priest made the news more than once

Just remembered I knew a man who had done years in prison for bank robbery many years ago. He’d given all the money away to homeless people that day then handed himself in. He was a lovely guy. Very gentle. Odd really.

Someone in the year above me (I have a vague idea my mum and his mum worked together) at school murdered his baby. I didn't know him like that but it did come as a shock

Someone in my year at school has been in prison for various things such as drugs and he glassed someone on a night out which he went to prison for

My sister worked with a woman who was really snooty. She was really unfriendly and thought she was superior. She left and got married. Years later we saw in the local paper that she and her husband had been arrested for fraud for organising charity collections and living off the proceeds. He ended up in jail.

Not murder or rape, but pretty despicable anyway.

School mate of my sister jailed for war crimes. Another very distant classmate jailed in Thailand for drug trafficking

When I was early 20's my previously lovely, gentle friend committed armed robbery while high. She'd gotten into drugs, unfortunately.

She told me a few years later her group was on an impulsive trip to the beach and wanted spending money. Apparently being high made robbing a country corner shop with a knife a good idea. Prison for a few hundred dollars.

It still makes me sad as she had a wonderful future until she became involved with drugs.

Yes. A very sadistic paedophile. He was extremely charming. And now in prison for a long time. Nice, well educated middle class chap.

It would be nice to imagine these people give you the actual creeps. But really they are super nice to women. It is unsettling to think about.

If they wanted to, but I think I'd hope they'd rather raise money to take people to Mass or Lourdes.

A lad I went to sixth form with, who was absolutely lovely and had no red flags, ended up being part of a proscribed terrorist organisation and was plotting to behead an MP. There's a show about him on Netflix with Stephen Graham in, it's called The Walk-in

A former colleague, eccentric but (I thought) lovely, had images of CSA on his computer.

My friend's ex-partner was quite possibly murdered, although it was recorded as natural causes.

A customer in my parents pub was found guilty of raping and murdering his 15 year old stepdaughter. He pled guilty.

Many locals are still not truly convinced the full story ever came out though. I certainly never thought he was the type… but I was only 17 myself so didn’t really know of the awful things men do.