Have you ever known someone who committed a serious crime?

[TheGhostsOfMeAndYou]

I’ve been listening to a true crime podcast recently and it got me thinking. One of the episodes was about Fred and Rose West. When Fred was first arrested (at the stage where police had only uncovered three bodies in the garden), his brother and sister-in-law spoke about him and said they couldn’t believe he’d done what he was accused of, as he had always seemed so gentle and polite spoken.

It made me wonder — has anyone here ever known someone who’s committed a serious crime, and did it come as a total shock? Or were there warning signs in hindsight? Did you ever suspect anything at the time? And how did others around them react — was it disbelief, or did some say they weren’t surprised?

My brother (now deceased) was involved in high value art/antiques fraud. He went to jail at least twice for fraud-related stuff and also once for bigamy. A well known documentary series made a bloody episode about him. My poor mother never quite recovered from the shame.

He was the type of person who could sell snow to the Eskimos. He'd also have given you his last £20 if you needed it. Sadly, he'd have quite happily swindled you out of your last £20 too. He was a big drinker and gambler who lived a colourful life and left a great deal of carnage in his wake.

I had a young relative arrested and found guilty of attempted murder of another child - not Jamie Bulger related but equally as disturbing.

He tried to tell famiky members that it was all a big game gone wrong, unfortunately I was fri²ends with a famiky member of the victim so knew both sides and there was no way it was a game. It was absolutely a calculated act.

He was released as a young adult and now has a wife and child. No idea if she knows his history but his mother still thinks her poor baby was innocent.

Personally I think the psychopath should have been locked up and the key thrown away.

Some years back, my new BF and I were having a lovely camping trip (honeymoon period). He kept telling me I was the most perfect girl imaginable and the only snag he could think of would be if I had a psycho ex. Of course I assured him that he needn't worry.

We were woken early the next morning by my mobile phone ringing. I didn't get to it in time to answer. It turned out to be my ex, who left a frantic message saying he'd just been in a fight and left someone for dead.

So that was fun.

Then a couple of years later, the "camping trip" BF went pretty crazy too (multiple factors, including but not limited to drug psychosis) and also attempted to kill someone.

Not sure how I managed to "bring out the best" in them both, they seemed to start out pretty nice.

This was all a long time ago and I am now very happily married to a lovely peaceful man. Mind you, we do joke that it's only a matter of time before I score my hat trick!

My uncle "Les" got a valedictory letter of sorts for some kind of "heroic" act during WW2, a result of which left him the owner of a Nazi dagger. He refused to ever talk about how or why he got the award but I suspect it falls into your Chat topic. He took the secret to the grave, passed away a decade ago- never married etc so nobody to ask!

Yes, very true. I would guess that in every street there is either a man who once committed a sexual crime and got away with it, or a man who’d be capable, given the opportunity, but is too timid/cowardly/frightened of being caught. In my street, for example, the horrible old farmer who lived opposite once made a sexual advance on a 13-year-old girl (only came out after he died). Another neighbour, a horrible weasel of a man, used to spy on the young girl who lived next door. Again it didn’t come out until after he’d died. That was just one, quiet, pleasant little suburban street in the countryside. I bet every one of us has socialised or worked with a man who did something vile and was never caught. I have known at least six women in my life who were raped or who survived CSA. None ever went to the police. Think how many times you’ve been near men who’ve set alarm bells ringing. How many male neighbours give you the creeps? How many would you not like to see talking to your daughter?

Yes sadly 2 murderers 2 armed robbers and a paedophile.
Armed robbers both from affluent families ( GP parents, business owners) and doing well for themselves, wanted a 'thrill' got caught trying to rob a bank.
First friend who committed murder was involved a major drug deal that went horribly wrong.
2nd friend muderdered their child and seriously injured their other child, the whole story wasn't told. Was awful.
Paedophile unfortunatly was my saturday job boss when I was 13, he abused me for 3 years but I was so scared to tell, even when he was covicted years later I didn't tell anyone.
The first 4 were lovely kind normal men, great friends and not rough, bad childhoods etc.

It was a Christian initiative via my parents who got to know the prison chaplain. Not like writing to prisoners in America! It was a local high security prison. We also collected hospice patients who were able to be taken to Mass. Some family members took people Lourdes annually. My cousin fund raises every year to take people there. I also used to sit with eg dementia patients to allow 'respite' time or just to let them go shopping etc.

Me and my then partner socialised with another couple, going for weekends away together. He murdered her. Total shock. He was sociable, humorous and good company. Never any sign beforehand.

I don't know anyone personally. However, I do know someone who is a relation to the 'killermarsh murders'. It made national headlines when a man murdered his pregnant partner, their two children and a friend who was sleeping over. He also raped his daughter before killing her. Truly despicable.

Someone in the street where i grew up murdered his 14 year old daughter
He pleaded diminished responsibility and was out years later.he still lives in the area and his wife and other child stood by him!

The brother of a school friend was convicted of murdering his wife and served 18 years. That was a shock to me as I always thought he was a lovely guy. He always protested his innocence and still does.

The dad of a girl in my ds year was convicted for being part of a national paedophile ring his wife I believe knew nothing about it until the house was raided there childminder who was the sister of one of the mums in dd year was in on it as well i think they were having an affair

the bloke across the road house was raided and was caught growing weed in his loft

the local shop dd used to work in was robbed by the store manager and her colleague as they had run up drug debts

Yeah I worked with a guy a few times who ended up getting arrested for child pornography possession. Came as a massive shock, he was fairly young (early/mid 20s) and I found him really charming, friendly and nice. Only ended up finding out because it hit the newspapers which it did because he worked as a background extra and had been in a bunch of really popular shows.

It sounds like a very worthwhile initiative to do but were you young visiting prisons? Were the prisoners ok towards you or looking back at it, would you send your own teen there?

As a teenager I frequently crossed paths with someone who ended up murdering someone a few years later. I never got bad vibes off him, but he didn’t strike me as someone who spent a lot of time thinking about the consequences of his actions.

Now my neighbour, around the same time, made me feel incredibly uncomfortable. On the surface, he was a law abiding, church going gentle soul. Everyone adored him and my parents even told me to stop being so weird around him. Years later he almost beat his wife to death. It turned out he’d been manipulating and terrorising the poor woman for years.

Around 20yrs ago, I did a once a week college release as part of my job. I became close to 3 ladies. All really lovely, had children etc. At end of the course one lady, Sarah told us one lunchtime she was having trouble finding work as she had a criminal record. To say we were dumbfounded to find out she served 4yrs out of a 8yr sentence for possession / dealing of class A drugs was an understatement (all linked to a man, who she got back with after his release).

She was a lovely young lady and I was literally lost for words. She ended up getting a job at the college as the lecturer vouched for her. Hope she is ok, and stayed out of prison. She certainly wasn’t someone you’d guess went to prison. I felt for her son, who missed 4yrs of his childhood due to some guy who his mother than shacked back up with. I struggled with that part, but wasn’t my place to comment.

I went to school with a boy who was sent to the principal's office almost daily for causing a disturbance in class. He lived in my neighborhood so I knew a lot about his home life.His parents were abusive to their kids and to each other. I saw the boy being made to walk around the block wearing a diaper as a punishment at age 9. I saw his mother brutalizing him in the front yard. After elementary school , I don't know what became of him until I read in the news that he had killed a girl that he had picked up at a bar. I was shocked by the news but considering his troubled history, not surprised.

My dad was a gangster involved in organised crime, bank robbery, and drug smuggling so I knew a lot of dodgy people when I was growing up. A couple of his friends were quite notorious but as my 'uncles' they were kind and generous men, especially after my dad was killed.
Professionally, I've known a few. I worked with someone who is currently serving a very long sentence for historic child sex offences and will likely die in prison before he's eligible for release - good.

I worked with children in care at one time. The officer in charge turned out to be abusing some of the children. He ended up in jail. I always felt repelled by him and was never sure why.

A neighbour - similar age to myself - split from his partner and absconded with their child. For several years the ex partner had no idea where her child was. Then he was tracked down. When the police came to the door he killed the child and then himself.

Through work I know someone who murdered another teenager many years ago. Like @GardenGaff 's acquaintance, he used his time in prison to turn his life around, became a social worker and is now passionate about preventing other children from making the mistakes he made. We haven't discussed it, but it's pretty obvious that he bitterly regrets his actions and the impact on others every single day.

Male I shared a house with at uni (HCP training) is in prison for multiple murders. Said man was off and a big liar.

Dad of my child’s classmate murdered a very young sex worker. Creepy as and again a big liar.

Both cases are horrific and made national papers.

yes me too @TigerRag he’s still in prison and it’s caused no end of rifts

I know 2 guys that turned out to be child sex offenders. One was a doctor I worked with. Made national news.

Yes - someone I know murdered his girlfriend when she was trying to get away from him and he also was charged with rape on others.

Someone else who globally defrauded millions of pounds on crypto - in prison.

My boyfriend has been in prison too but I will reframe from sharing the details.