Does anyone else almost live a different life in their head?

[Wheelerdeeler]

I hope this doesn't make me sound unhinged but I do this sometimes. For context, I am a mid 40s married mother.

However, I spend part of my day living a completely different life. In my head.

At the moment, the fake life centers around a silly crush I have on a work colleague - 20 years my junior.

I imagine us getting together but I am 20 years younger, how it would happen, the way it would happen right through to us having twins!

I am happy in my own real life. Why do I do this? I know there is the crush element, it isn't serious and I would never do anything about it but I do laugh at myself. How ridiculous am I being like this? The poor guy is blissfully unaware that as he sits opposite me at a meeting I am planning our next date/holiday/child.

If it wasn't about him, I would still have this alternative life sometimes in my head. Different characters but there nearly always is something.

As I type I can see how mad this all is but am I alone? Do others do this?

I have several other lives. I sometimes ‘live’ them whilst I’m on my own, pottering around the house, but usually I use them to help me get to sleep at night. They make me happy. I’m married with two children and not remotely interested in having a different life IRL, but have always been a daydreamer.

No! What is going on? Is everyone else my DH included living another life in another dimension?!

How does this work? Do you narrate a story inside your head? Do you see it like a film? Do you do it whilst doing other things or only when doing nothing?

I’m not sure any explanation would make sense if you don’t do it!

The closest I can get is it’s a bit like when you are going to a job interview. You imagine what they might ask you, you picture what you are wearing and how you will answer. Or if you are looking forward to a concert or show or something, you might imagine what you will do - dance or sing.
It’s kind of like that but not based in reality much! I don’t narrate - it’s more like watching a TV show - sometimes I can see me but sometimes I’m me looking out at things. But what I’m thinking about will never happen.

Sometimes I might have a conversation out loud, usually if I’m on my own in the car. I leave gaps for him to say his bit! Mostly it’s entirely in my head and it’s often as I go to sleep.

Yes! I have adhd so this is my excuse for being a bit bonkers. One of my lives is as a little house on the prairie style woman with many children and a husband who is always at market. Sometimes we explore the old American mid West in our caravan as a little holiday,

To some extent it's a manifestation of boredom, im a SAHM but the only time I didnt do this was when I had a super stressful job that I loved that I needed to do 15 things at once. My brain needs to be busy or it makes its own entertainment

@awakeandasleep I reckon it's only people who have an internal monologue.

I can see the prairie for example even though I am also seeing my kitchen? But just with my mind's eye

I know im nuts 😂😂

I've daydreamed for as long as I remember and I enjoy it very much. I love living my fantasy life in my head. The adventures, the lovers, the fortune!

I've scored winning goals, won medals, sold out stadiums and had wild affairs with fabulous men, all in my head.

I do! But not another life as myself, but characters I create. I write stories and it's how I get ideas for plot/scenes. I often do it in car rides (when I'm the passenger obviously) and when I'm going to sleep. It does sometimes influence my dreams and I live a life as someone who isn't me, and sometimes the story carries on the next time I'm asleep. I like that my brain is full of loads of story ideas, it's a great escape from reality when things are a bit shit

Yep, but unfortunately my face acts out my daydreams for me 😭

I could be imagining a scenario where I'm angry and I'll start frowning, or accidently laugh out loud when I'm imagining myself in a funny scene. I also have full blown, out loud conversations in the car. Sometimes the same one on repeat with only minor details changed. I think I actually am mental.

I do this all the time. It makes me happy.

Ha ha ha. You’ve just reminded me how I met Ronnie O’Sullivan ice-skating and we started dating. I’ve not had the imaginary other life for 25 years but you’ve just brought it all back.

I do this!

When I'm tidying up/ laundry. Mine focus on spending lottery wins/moving house/ DC when adults. I sort of tell a story to myself. I got really into one the other day when I have my DD (currently at school) and her husband and twins money to extend their 2 up 2 down and I planned the whole extension and decor 😅 I also had once recently where I had a make believe affair with my boss and then married him.

I do this but it will often be about a friendship with someone I admire and conversations we'd have. I've got real life friends too, this is just my inner life.

I’d love to be able to do this. I am firmly strapped in to reality, alas.

I do this, I'm blissfully happy at home with my sleeping one year old right now, but in my other life I'm a features journalist for a popular fashion magazine in Paris.

100% almost all of the time. Currently, I am in a long term marriage with Damon Albert - we have just bought a house and discussing renovations

I've always done this, for as long as I can remember. The parallel life changes from time to time. And the crush, which is usually a celebrity of some sort

Love it 🤣 I'm living in a gypsy caravan travelling the land with Colin Farrell

This is excellent food for thought, thankyou

I am sure my DH and DD have this they hypervisualise and also say they can see things whilst also seeing things in the room. They say it is like a video recording clear and crisp. I am super jealous and I'm sure DH's imagery world is far more exciting than our real life!

My DH cannot watch horror films etc due to this.

Blimey this isn't fair! Any downsides for us mere mortals?

I do this too but everything about it is fictitious. No one really exists. Like a book. It's a polar opposite to my life and in reality I wouldn't want to swop to be in my "story" either. Mostly daydreaming about being late 30's single doing up a run down Edwardian / French type flat above cafe overlooking a city park. Possibly Hyde park type thing. I'm broke too. It's nuts. I love it. It rarely changes much and I think it's self soothing. I know every inch of my non existent flat too. Even my bedding.

It's constant safe space that i completely control. My life's a bit more hectic and unpredictable in reality with kids I adore and a pretty decent dh and home.

No, none 🤣

Wow! I think I have found my people! I used to do this loads. Not so much now. I always thought I was the only person who did this!