The childcare debate

[ClawsandEffect]

I'm the grandparent in this equation. I do about 30 hours a week of childcare, including some overnights. I adore my DGC and don't want to stop doing it. But I also work full-time (WFH) and am exhausted.

Edited to say, I didn't have this support when I was the parent. And as a feminist I think it's essential DGC's mother works.

It’s the great grandparent revolt – and it shows we parents aren’t the only ones burnt out by family life | Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett | The Guardian

OP, when your DD is at work overnight, is her partner also working?

I'm all for better childcare provision. But expecting any state support with antisocial hours is unreasonable. Shift working parents need to manage their schedules around each other or one (or both) of them needs to find different work.
You doing 30 hours of childcare a week on top of fulltime work isn't feminism. They are taking advantage of you.

I sympathise. Similar sitch here.
Son and GF live with us and have since pregnancy (just in process of completing on their house). GC is 11 months and an absolute smasher!
OH works from home and said he would have little one so that GF could get a 32 hour contract to enable them to get a mortgage (she was zero hours previously). 3 months on though and he is exhausted, mainly because GF literally hands baby over the minute he wakes up as she needs to "get ready" for work. Nursery days twice a week are never flexed to fit her work schedule (which changes month to month) and she'll happily take a day off rather than ask if they can switch days to ensure he is at nursery on a day she is working. They've never even asked the question. To top it off, when they move (around 5 miles away) they are now expecting us to collect little one and drive him back to our area for nursery as they don't want to move him to one more local (GF doesn't drive - a long story but she's never "got around" to sorting lessons).
On top of all this we have little one A LOT at weekends and evenings. Emotional blackmail is rife.
I could go on and on about this as I have a lot of pent up frustration but my general point is... I hear you and I know it's tough. And I also know it's not as simple as refusing to have your GC.