So apparently I'm having 18 people for a lunch party on Monday.

[Womblealongwithme]

DH and I were supposed to be at a party 3 weeks ago and unfortunately, I came down with a sickness bug so DH went on his own.

He has just reminded me about the bank holiday party we're having on Monday and asked what I needed him to do for it. Except I wasn't at the party and knew nothing about said party. DH is the loveliest, kindest man on the planet and was diagnosed with ADHD about 10 years ago, which means that sometimes, he has conversations with me in his head, that don't quite make it to me! (Like inviting all and sundry to said bank holiday party!) So, dear readers, I need ideas from you lot quickly. We don't have a barbecue so I have my fridge and an oven and not a lot of kitchen space.

Add to that, that most of tomorrow will be taken up with various sporting activities for DS and DD so I don't have a whole lot of time, pretty much Monday morning only! Oh and it needs to cater for vegetarian and coeliac guests. Help!

Disclaimer - DH will absolutely be involved in prep and feel awful that he has sprung this on me!

@Womblealongwithme I’m sure your marriage is lovely and I’m glad you’re not stressed by this but I don’t really understand why your husband isn’t doing the lion’s share of the organising and prep. Why is he just ‘helping’? 😂

People always overcomplicate this stuff.

Keep it simple and tasty is the way to go.

Maybe the OP is better at that? I would be!
She seems happy to embrace the challenge so good for her.

If you’re absolutely ok with it @Womblealongwithmethen fine, you do you. My response to my DH if he landed this on me, would be, ‘Fuck no’.
But don’t you think it’s odd that not one person out of the 18 has mentioned it to you in the last three weeks? You don’t seem to be addressing that to the posters that have suggested you check numbers.

I think that's the way their marriage is. She's clearly ok with it, though.

I did something similar as had no time to prepare for it and I just got most of it from Cook and that worked really well. Just a few other bits eg bread, cheese etc from elsewhere.

I got four hours notice last year to make a dinner for 53 people (I'd made a couple for 20 previously but I'm just a home cook). Catering company arrived late so our staff and their's needed feeding (temporary event crew)...gas bottle, single ring, deep pan and a paella pan or a gas BBQ were what I had available.

Banging vegetarian Thai curry - sweet potato and butternut instead of chicken - it's actually way nicer (I'm a carnivore) and gluten free as well.

You've got to tell us why you had such short notice!

You're taking this amazingly well.
I'd do curry - vat of butter chicken, vat of dal, a veg one, raita, rice, buy in roti because I do make my own but not for 18, and then maybe Eton mess with bought meringues for dessert.
Or soup/ salad/ cold meat/quiches. You could do two soups for choice, a tomato and a more interesting one.

Gluten free oats are very expensive

I’d check how many people are actually coming. And then I’d provide a sort of deconstructed ploughman’s/DIY picnic type food.

Hi op, without sounding patronising do you understand about coeliac disease and cross contamination such as separate butter, toaster, a tiny crumb can cause alot of intestinal damage, hope all goes well x

That poster is right OP, it’s very odd that you have that many people supposedly coming and no-one has confirmed. I don’t think she was suggesting it wasn’t true but that DH may have his wires crossed. Tbe fact he invited them doesn’t mean they’re all coming. He needs to phone around first to check this is even a thing and if so what the numbers really are.

And he needs to do the catering obviously.

OP how about a couple of joints - a ham and beef or lamb leg and a salmon side or whole one if you can run to it. Dressed up on platters with carving knife and fork. A big tray of roasted veg, a veg chilli or hot pasta bake for the veggie options, some good bread and bowls of mixed salad, pasta and rice salads. Dips and breadsticks or veggie sticks dotted around along with nibbly things like crackers, crips and nuts, and you’re done.

I was always glad when my late OH didn't 'help', much easier on my own with him doing the out-of-kitchen stuff!
This thread takes me back almost 45 years, I had told him on Monday to invite a couple of friends for dinner on Friday, a fairly regular arrangement. On the Friday he decided to 'go down to the Mess for more wine', I thought we'd enough. He arrived back panting, the meal went ahead but a year later, when we were all ready to move on, I discovered that he's not invited them, had run up to their flat, a difficult place to get to and begged them to come!

I'm not suggesting it's not stressful and I'm not so laid back that I wouldn't have gone mental at him when he told me...but I don't think it's unfeasible or has to be a big issue. It's family, it's the summer, it's informal. Dips, gluten free breadsticks, gluten free pasta salad with shop bought roasted veg & pesto, other salads, shop bought party packs popped in the oven, jerk chicken drumsticks or corn cobs, crisps, cheese platters, little cakes, fruit...there are loads of easy things that can be laid out on the table. He absolutely has to help, absolutely has to do the main share of clearing up and absolutely has to be more careful and maybe text her the second he plans something so he doesn't forget. I obviously don't know, but I feel like this came about because she was ill and couldn't make the last party, so it came from a good place and thinking of her, and she seems very happy and not in the least tired of or resentful of him. She just asked for some menu ideas!

I would definitely reach out to the guests to check it's actually happening. Something like "just confirming numbers for Monday".. as it seems odd not a single person has messaged to confirm timings / ask if they can bring anything etc etc and it's tomorrow now!
Not sure where in the UK you are but it's far too hot here for curry / chilli etc as some posters have suggested. I would do a cold spread of salads, picky bits, sides, breads, cheese, olives etc with a few bits of posh party food that you can warm in the oven. Make it easy for yourself and throw money at pre-prepared food.

I did! Catering company arrived late! It was something along the lines of: Boss said "Can you do your curry again? "Yeah sure. When?" "Tonight. Fifty or so people" "Oh. Right. Cheers."

Cheeky fucker.

Or, as she clearly understands and loves her ND DH who is clearly mortified, she could, well, do what she says she’s going to do without unhelpful remarks like this.

Just a thought?

Well if it was me who'd received the woolly invite from the DH, I'd be waiting for Op/DH to get in touch with the confirmed arrangements, time etc .
Its a bit awkward, possibly rude, to message and ask someone are they still hosting on Monday, especially if within their circles the host normally provides everything except drinks.

Sorry but that made me laugh so much 🤣

How is it sad to see it as his problem to solve?

If you think it's easy for the OP to sort it out with help from the husband, why do you think it is a punishment for the husband to sort it out with help from the OP?

It’s Sunday morning OP so what have you decided to serve your guests so you can pop to the shops and get prepped?
How many people have confirmed that they are coming?

As it still warm i would make like a tapas/mezze table. Olives, hummus, little bread sticks, little chorizos, cheese, little prawns cooked with garlic and parsley, crisps,popcorn, sangria drinks, pork belly fried with paprika , nuggets for children etc.. also some watermelon and melon..

Today is still Sunday