So apparently I'm having 18 people for a lunch party on Monday.

[Womblealongwithme]

DH and I were supposed to be at a party 3 weeks ago and unfortunately, I came down with a sickness bug so DH went on his own.

He has just reminded me about the bank holiday party we're having on Monday and asked what I needed him to do for it. Except I wasn't at the party and knew nothing about said party. DH is the loveliest, kindest man on the planet and was diagnosed with ADHD about 10 years ago, which means that sometimes, he has conversations with me in his head, that don't quite make it to me! (Like inviting all and sundry to said bank holiday party!) So, dear readers, I need ideas from you lot quickly. We don't have a barbecue so I have my fridge and an oven and not a lot of kitchen space.

Add to that, that most of tomorrow will be taken up with various sporting activities for DS and DD so I don't have a whole lot of time, pretty much Monday morning only! Oh and it needs to cater for vegetarian and coeliac guests. Help!

Disclaimer - DH will absolutely be involved in prep and feel awful that he has sprung this on me!

I’d make a meat and a veg curry or chilli in a slow cooker (remember to use stock cubes that are gluten free made in advance everyone helps themselves), rice and or jacket potatoes and possibly corn chips ok for everyone, maybe do a cheeseboard (if time permits), but just grapes and chutneys so no cross contamination ok for coeliacs and veggies and eaton mess for dessert bung in crushed ready made meringues, strawberries and raspberries, creme fraiche and possibly grated white chocolate. Plenty of alcohol and soft drinks. Job done.

This is the best ‘middle way’ option. You don’t disappoint innocent friends who are expecting to come but definitely send him out with a list. He could also first send a message checking everyone is actually coming.

You might deign to set out the table…

Result: hopefully you have a lovely party but he does the heavy lifting and maybe learns a lesson!

Catering for 18 isn’t too bad. I do it from time to time and it isn’t difficult, but there will be a bit of chaos. Don’t be tempted to do a grazing table type thing as it works out very expensive if you want it to look good. I’d do 3 big bowls of pasta with different sauces (one gf), 3 big salads, 4 garlic breads. Breadsticks and bowls of olives for nibbles. Drop one bowl of pasta and add a platter of carved rotisserie chicken if you like. This will be a fair bit of work so for dessert maybe do a huge single dish bake pudding (simple fruit crumble etc). Serve with cream, ice cream or store bought custard if needed. You can bake this today and maybe fresh fruit for the gf guests.

I avoid gluten and wouldnt do this as - in my extensive experience - 😬- the overwhelming majority of gluten free breads etc still taste horrible with the possible exception of warbutons pittas and even then only bearable if toasted! Why should others have to suffer the horrible cardboard chemical laden gluten free breads just because I can’t eat normal stuff. Just keep the coeliac safe food well away from everything else - maybe marked and plated in fridge.

It been said before but in 35 years of catering for friends I cannot imagine a scenario where the majority wouldn’t contact us first to ask if they could bring a dish.
Neurodivergent DH invited 25 recently in a very haphazard way managed to relay the offers of food to myself but clearly didn’t go on to explain the situation as we were inundated with crisps and nibbles on top of our catering 🤦‍♀️
Have you checked if anyone has confirmed with him since the invitation?

Loving some of the suggestions here, going to try the aubergine bake today.

It been said before but in 35 years of catering for friends I cannot imagine a scenario where the majority wouldn’t contact us first to ask if they could bring a dish.
Neurodivergent DH invited 25 recently in a very haphazard way managed to relay the offers of food to myself but clearly didn’t go on to explain the situation as we were inundated with crisps and nibbles on top of our catering 🤦‍♀️
Have you checked if anyone has confirmed with him since the invitation?

Loving some of the suggestions here, going to try the aubergine bake today.

It been said before but in 35 years of catering for friends I cannot imagine a scenario where the majority wouldn’t contact us first to ask if they could bring a dish.
Neurodivergent DH invited 25 recently in a very haphazard way managed to relay the offers of food to myself but clearly didn’t go on to explain the situation as we were inundated with crisps and nibbles on top of our catering 🤦‍♀️
Have you checked if anyone has confirmed with him since the invitation?

Loving some of the suggestions here, going to try the aubergine bake today.

It been said before but in 35 years of catering for friends I cannot imagine a scenario where the majority wouldn’t contact us first to ask if they could bring a dish.
Neurodivergent DH invited 25 recently in a very haphazard way managed to relay the offers of food to myself but clearly didn’t go on to explain the situation as we were inundated with crisps and nibbles on top of our catering 🤦‍♀️
Have you checked if anyone has confirmed with him since the invitation?

Loving some of the suggestions here, going to try the aubergine bake today.

I've got to say, I agree with this.

That's a lot of food. Especially as they're probably not coming.

I'd also vote for chilli - a meat option, veg option, rice, tortilla chips, dips. That's my go to for a crowd.
Or a cold lunch - meats, cheeses, bread, olives etc.
Get Dh to do the shopping!

I don’t disagree but agree about the warbuttons are not bad 😁
was just trying to make it easier!

I wouldn’t be doing anything - his party, his problem.

But one of the guests isn't just gluten sensitive, they are coeliac! Any meal that is heavy on bread will have a very high cross contamination risk.

I'm shocked at the people suggesting ordering in pizza. Yes you can get gf pizza but it's not great so I assume they just mean standard bases and just let the coeliac sit in the corner breathing through a napkin. Likewise bought quiches and I cringed a bit at grazing platter, there are several dietary needs to cater for, some quite serious.

Much better to go for an option that doesn't center a gluten based carb. Baked potato is a great option or a pick and mix buffet with either very limited or no gluten containing products at all then let the coeliac choose first. I think people would tolerate a gf bread (which yes aren't great) if it wasn't the main part of the meal.

Have these people actually confirmed they are coming, and he did not mention over these weeks at all that guest a offers to bring this or that or that person is coming etc or someone needs the address etc- it did not come up at all? You are planning to feed 18 people,just becquse its a bank holiday- a family time,time to soend with your kdis you are now to spend running around feeding random people,if they turn up,if not you are stuck with a lot of food and wasted money that you could have spent on the kids. Your husband is acting like a simpleton.

That made me

Surely no-one wants chilli, baked potatoes etc for lunch on a hot summer day. Eat in the garden, cold food buffet with the odd hot item like a bowl of new potatoes.

How about sone prawn cocktails to go with your DHs retro vibes?

Why are you okay with being treated like a total skivvy?

Confirm the numbers first.
Very odd that none of these friends has spoken to you about this yet.

I agree with pps.

18 people & not one has contacted to at least say "missed you at X's do-looking forward to yours".

Plus it's BH & no one has other arrangements?

I’d say this is a good shout! When I had around 12 guests recently I did similar to above, plus jacket potatoes and a big slow cooker full of chilli and a big bowl of grated cheese. Also for a really easy pudding I go for a pile of scones, a couple/few tubs of clotted cream and a bowl of jam. Everyone makes their own, really easy and always very popular!

Ignore those saying go out and leave him to it. You’ve already said how lovely he is, and is doing whatever is needed! Have a lovely day!

Mmm, so cosy

Maybe some mulled wine for good measure.

This wouldn't phase me (but my dh is an enthusiastic cook so would happily plan and cook as well).

I'd do a summery roast meat dish e.g.
https://www.gordonramsayrestaurants.com/recipes/roast-chicken-with-chickpea-stuffing-and-big-green-salad/ (I would do 2 large chickens)
Or slow roast lamb with garlic and preserved lemons

Plus sides:

Green salad

Tomato salad

Roast cauliflower with a tahini dressing and pomegranate seeds (so the veggies have a decent main option)

Easy roast potatoes (boil new potatoes, allow to steam dry, then roast in hot oil until starting to go golden, remove from the oven, smash them down slightly with a fork or potato masher, sprinkle with salt, rosemary and garlic, leave them to cool and absorb the flavours then put them back in the hot oven to get crispy about 20 mins before serving) or potato salad with a lemon dressing. Alternatively couscous.

Nice bread and butter

Berries, cream, fruit coulis and meringues served separately so people can help themselves to the bits they can eat.

Or a bowl of strawberries and a selection of ice lollies.

If you have a Costco nearby I'd just buy rather than cook. They have loads of things that serve large numbers, so you can go for Mediterranean style dips and salads or things you bung in the oven, depending on your preference.

It's going to be hot across the UK on Monday so I d err on the side of cold buffet style.

Please don't be a ghost (like so many OPs). Come back afterwards and tell us what happened. Nobody will judge, honestly.

I’d go down with a bug again personally.