So apparently I'm having 18 people for a lunch party on Monday.

[Womblealongwithme]

DH and I were supposed to be at a party 3 weeks ago and unfortunately, I came down with a sickness bug so DH went on his own.

He has just reminded me about the bank holiday party we're having on Monday and asked what I needed him to do for it. Except I wasn't at the party and knew nothing about said party. DH is the loveliest, kindest man on the planet and was diagnosed with ADHD about 10 years ago, which means that sometimes, he has conversations with me in his head, that don't quite make it to me! (Like inviting all and sundry to said bank holiday party!) So, dear readers, I need ideas from you lot quickly. We don't have a barbecue so I have my fridge and an oven and not a lot of kitchen space.

Add to that, that most of tomorrow will be taken up with various sporting activities for DS and DD so I don't have a whole lot of time, pretty much Monday morning only! Oh and it needs to cater for vegetarian and coeliac guests. Help!

Disclaimer - DH will absolutely be involved in prep and feel awful that he has sprung this on me!

Organising a party and forgetting to tell OP until the last minute is one thing.

Saying 'can I help?' in that scenario is the very essence of twattishness.

Meat in bread, yes the vegetarian and coeliac guests will love that 🤣

Have you got a Costco card? Trays of sandwiches are great, they do big pasta salads. Cooked chickens and bags of salad (Caesar and the amazing Broccoli salad are lovely!). Huge cakes and baked goods. Crips and dips, olives etc. Best place for parties! Enjoy x

Chuck a gammon joint in stock into the slow cooker Sunday evening. Get some gf and vegan tarts. Add salad bags amd crusty french sticks. It'll be fine!

I wouldn’t be doing this. I would be relaxing this bank holiday! Your dh is a total donkey for inviting everyone without asking you first, a non starter here. Then he forgot to tell you, and finally instead of taking responsibility for his mess he passes it on to you, and lamely offers to help?!

It is up to you if you if you want to be a doormat op. He clearly doesn’t respect you very much - this has got nothing at all to do with his ADHD! He just dumps on you, and you let him. Anyone with a shred of self respect would tell him to do one.

He's has ADHD so he will do this to you again.
ADHD people have poor working memories and forget the times they dumped others in it.

You have a bigger problem here than the lunch that he sprung on you.

Ocado do frozen French bits from Picard, they are lush and you just stick them in the oven..like posh sausage rolls, little goats cheese tartes etc. Get a load of those and cycle them throughout the party.

Get DH to do salads

A ton of posh crisps

Tell guests to bring the drinks (and get 24 beers and a box of each colour wine as backup)

Fruit shoots to make it a PARTY for the children

Loads of nice fruit (you can still get cherries in Sainsbury's) and Big tray bake cake from Sainsbury's for pudding

All the PPs saying "make him cater every last crumb as punishment" -- she doesn't actually sound upset? It's very possible they're her friends too? He hasn't told her the night before, there's time to organise things and have a bit of a laugh about it. Unless the dripfeed is coming "he says he'll withhold my housekeeping allowance if there's not steak Chateaubriand and he's constantly texting his work bestie" then chill out and let these guys have a party, it really doesn't seem that bad 🙈

Do check ur DH actually invited people tho. If he just mentioned it at this previous party and didn't actually text people, you may have a problem.

Have you got a slow cooker? I normally do easy food for situations like this - gammon joint/pulled pork etc and have rolls/condiments that people can help theirselves too. Low maintenance on your side. Then lots of charcuterie type food on a table.

Do you have a slow cooker, or could borrow one or two?

I don't think it's that deep. OP didn't say she minded, she was just asking for meals/ recipes that taste good with little time & effort...
Your post reads really aggressively.

I don't understand why you are doing all the thinking. I am diagnosed with adhd and if I had accidentally organised a party I would organise the food.
I don't quite understand why nobody has contacted you about this or mentioned it. Is it all.his friends?

Now I’m curious about what sort of feast you’re going to pull out the bag at such short notice - there’s no shortage of great suggestions here.
Have a lovely day whatever you end up doing 🥂

Chilli con carne and non carne are great and can be done in a slow cooker. Then just boil up a vat of rice and garlic bread for those who can have it. Add a very very basic side salad and shop bought pavlova base topped with whipped cream and fruit, then a packet of ice lollies for kids.

I also think it's odd that no one has contacted you to check details and confirm attendance. I would definitely put out a message to the group to find out if the invitation has actually been made and to find out who is coming.

I’m just sitting with a glass of wine after clearing up from a lunch for 12. We had an antipasto platter with focaccia (someone else did bring the platter, I baked the focaccia but it could all have been sourced from the supermarket) then did a meat and veggie lasagne (can be GF lasagne sheets) and a couple of salads. I made a birthday cake as it was DGD’s birthday but my latest fave dessert is eton mess with homemade lemon curd which is easy, or just do pavlovas with lots of fruit.

I'm actually shocked at some of the suggestions on this thread! Dominoes isn't a good option for coeliac as they even state there's possible cross contamination. Sausage rolls, quiche etc all contain gluten and/or wheat. As someone who doesn't eat gluten, but not coeliac (as far as I know, but pretty likely), I'd be pretty pissed off at some of the suggestions and would have nothing to eat!

Something in the slow cooker is a good idea, like a veggie curry (it won't hurt us meat eaters to eat a veggie meal), have some rice, and cauliflower rice (it's much nicer than regular rice IMO), gf naan (if available). Add a cheese board, along with fruit and maybe a nice wine.

Just remember that anything you serve containing gluten/wheat absolutely has to be served separately and very clear that no cross contamination should happen (such as coeliacs should have a separate butter and knife to butter their own gf bread), although it sounds like it's a group of people you socialize with, so I would imagine everyone knows anyway!

Second @ApolloandDaphne . Surely you need to contact all the invited guests and make sure they’re actually coming. You weren’t at the party where the invite was made so you don’t know how seriously it was made / received - people might have been expecting follow up to confirm it was all happening.
I’m trying to imagine being at a gathering where a friend’s partner made a spontaneous invite like this. I’d be really conscious of her not being party to this invite and I’d definitely follow up to check it was all systems go - and confirm timings / what I should bring.

It will be nuts if you prepare a feast for 18 and only 4 turn up for example!!

I would do either boards with meats, cheese, salads, olives and breads or jacket potatoes and cook a chilli and put out other toppings ie tuna, cheese and salad.
One of my siblings has ADHD and it sounds like exactly the type of thing they would do, they would also be panicking about dropping their OH in it and trying to help put it right.
Have a lovely party!

I’d just make a couple of salads and order in pizzas. Save yourself the hassle. Once you have enough wine/beer/water and a few bowls of crisps around everyone will have fun anyway

Cold lunch...
Cold meats, breads, butter filings etc cut on diagonal and served as finger food such as:
Chicken wings cooked in oven drained on kitchen paper and kept in fridge.
Rabbit or Duck Terrine on buttered baggettes with greens.
Cut up vegetables with Homus to dip
Pikelets with cream cheese and salmon, topped with dill.
Baggettes with roast pumpkin, spinach and peppers.

Platters of club sandwiches - made by caterer for special dietry needs - organised by DH.

Seasonal fruit platters.
Cheeses, grapes, quince paste, crackers.

Iced soft drinks ..
Fruit punch
Lemon and mint water
Tonic water
Beers, two bottles of bubbly.

Pot of tea

Cook, roast etc the night before.
Chop earlly morning of party.
Set up - side plates, napkins, glasses, ice, buffet table
Assemble on platters near to time with help from early arriving friends..

Or manage a couple of these foods and ask all guests to bring some finger food to share.

Or order in Indian dishes and serve with green salad and plain rice. Scones, jam and cream, pot of good tea to finish.

I'd just buy a barbecue. Maybe two (to cover the veggies). They aren't expensive.

Decent sausages, burgers, and make chicken skewers.
Frozen corn, and make pepper and onion skewers.
Greek salad
Caesar salad
Baguettes and coeliac friendly wraps.

Done. Half hour prep, cooking time is socialising time

This isn’t a You party.
This is is a HIS PARTY.

Definitely.

There’s only two options otherwise you are enabling your husband’s behaviour:

• you tell your husband to cancel since it wasn’t discussed with you and it’s too late notice
• you let your husband host the party he invited people to - that he means plans the food, activities and preps the house for to.

If your teenager sprung something like this on you without consulting you, that required you to give up your time, home and drop £££ at last minute to facilitate the plans, you’d rightly tell them no chance. And you’d do this as a natural consequence to teach them not to treat you like a mug, and to let them learn for themselves the time and effort that goes into hosting so that they don’t casually volunteer your time and effort next time they feel like a party. Why would you expect less respect from your husband than your child?

You could decide to leave him to it but if you feel like catering at short notice then it is perfectly possible but only if you have a good supermarket near you which is open today. You could poach two whole salmon (if you can get them) or do a whole ham. Then make a huge green salad, some new potatoes either hot or as a potato salad, a tomato salad, and roast a tray of vegetables (courgette red pepper aubergine mushrooms garlic) which you could serve as is or sprinkled with feta. Then do a big cheeseboard and buy in some puddings. You can get huge frozen cheesecakes at Waitrose, one of those and some fruit (sliced peaches in rose) would be a decent finale. The whole thing will involve a fair amount of chopping but no real cooking and no complicated timings.

Ooh not ideal but ive had large numbers at short notice and absolutely doable. I'd probably do some meat cuts but lots of really substantial salads, breads and cheeses. Do you have a budget in mind?