Hand hold please - my beautiful boy is having Neurosurgery tomorrow morning.

[Coffeeandcrocs]

Lying here, unable to sleep and brain going a million miles an hour!

My lovely 3 year old DS2 has cerebral palsy and is having Neurosurgery tomorrow in the hopes of removing the spasticity in his lower limbs so he can come down from his tiptoes when walking and be able to stand unaided.

The hospital in 2.5 hours from home and it's a 3 week stay, DD and DS1 are at home with my mum. We've never been away from them before, bar when DS2 was born and in NICU for 12 days and the odd night away which I could count on one hand. DH is with us until Tuesday evening and then I'll be on my own until the weekend after next as he's self employed as well as the other two needing one of us home.

None of my children have ever had surgery before, let alone one so complex!

Thinking of you and your family OP - whilst it feels absolutely enormous now, you will all get through this and be looking back on it in the not too distant future 💐💐

Hoping all goes well OP x

Good luck! Hope the days goes quick!

Wishing you and your darling boy all the very best.

Handhold from me OP. Do you have anything to watch? I watched ready or not recently- took my mind off things.

I'm guessing selective dorsal rhizotomy? Really hope he's one of the success stories. Best of look for a smooth procedure tomorrow, and a good recovery.

Thinking of you and your lovely son. May his recovery go well ❤️

We have some of the best surgeons in the world, and despite it's recent woe's, the NHS is still world class. It's totally natural to worry and really hope everything goes well. Please keep us all informed, you have the whole of Mumsnet with you.

Sending love & luck to you & your beautiful boy xxx

Wishing all the luck to you, your lovely boy and the rest of your family.

Yes, that's the one! He will be in very good hands and I have absolute faith in the surgeon. The not knowing what he'll be like with all his spasticity gone and how much rehab work will be needed is hard to wrap my head around - we just want to give him as much independence as possible as he grows.

Sending lots of luck and good wishes to you, DS & your family OP

Brilliant. I always think if you can find a clinician you truly trust, that's three quarters of the battle. I'm only a paediatrician, but I have known some kids really see mobility improvement after having this done.

Sending virtual hugs and thoughts to you.

One of our children went through various surgeries when a toddler (not related to CP) and I can recall the fear. I hope the surgery goes well and makes a real.positive difference to your DS.

And take bottles of water, mints snacks for you x

Sending all the hugs and handholds OP 💛

Oh how scary for you, but exciting too! It'll be a tough few weeks for all of you, but it'll be behind you soon enough with hopefully a brilliant outcome for DS 🥰

Sending huge hugs...

Thinking of you both OP. From a mum of another little one with a health condition requiring surgery. 💐

So much love to you. Will be thinking of you tomorrow x

Hope everything goes well ❤️

How very scary that must be - wishing you and him all the best for a good result and fast recovery!

Sending a handhold. I hope you get some sleep tonight and that tomorrow goes really smoothly.

I know tomorrow is something no one ever wants to face. Brain surgery on your little one…. it’s heavy, it’s terrifying, and it’s not fair. I just want you to know that you’re not alone in this.

You are walking through something incredibly hard, and you’re doing it with the kind of strength that doesn’t always look loud or brave, sometimes it’s just showing up, staying present, holding their hand, breathing through the fear. That’s real strength. That’s love in motion.

Your child is going into this held by your love, and by the hands of people trained to do exactly this work. You don’t have to be “positive” or “strong” in any performative way. Just be what you are. That’s more than enough.

If you need to fall apart, do it. If you need to scream, do it. If you need to sit quietly and just breathe, that’s enough too. You’re doing the hardest thing a parent can do…and you’re doing it.

I’m holding you in my thoughts. One foot in front of the other, that’s all you need to do right now.

Sending prayers and thoughts your way OP, take it day by day/hour by hour/breath by breath whatever helps to get you through the surgery and have your boy back in your arms hopefully having had a completely successful operation.

You dont say how old your other two DC are so just in case it's relevant....younger ones struggle with facetime calls so please dont get it in your head that they aren't missing you/dont care if they dont want to chat much. Have your mum or DH prop the phone/tablet up and just watch them play, ask the odd question about what they are doing and conversation will likely come more naturally and even if you dont end up chatting much just having you there on the screen so they can see you and you can see them can really help you all to feel connected whilst you are apart. Voice notes rather than texts is also easier for younger children x

I remember a mum crying when her son was able to lift his arms above his head to put a T shirt on. (He’d had a scoliosis repair at the same time.) hopefully you will have a similar moment!