Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

TW death. Would you be put off living in a house that someone passed away in?

43 replies

ExcellentMother · 03/07/2025 14:15

TW
My Dad "unalived" himself in the garage of my parents house that they rented.
Shortly after that happened, my mum moved out and new tenants were moved in within a week.
Which got me thinking tonight.

Would you want to know if someone died in a house or would you not mind and not want to know the history?

OP posts:
PauliesWalnuts · 03/07/2025 14:17

It wouldn't bother me. My mum died at our family home - she was youngish, had cancer, and wanted to die at home with her family close by, which was what she got and I was happy to facilitate that.

My current home is nearly 200 years old - people will have died there, I have no record of how, when or why, and as long as it's a happy home for me that's all that matters.

Myrobalanna · 03/07/2025 14:19

Surely anywhere you live that isn't brand spanking new, there's a likelihood that someone will have died there?

Sorry about your dad, what a hard thing. x

Hyperion100 · 03/07/2025 14:19

.

Shetlands · 03/07/2025 14:20

I'm sure lots of people have died in my old house but I don't think about it. However, I was put off buying a place where the owners (an elderly couple) had killed themselves in the sitting room the year before.

Moveoverdarlin · 03/07/2025 14:21

If a family member had died in the house I was living in of old age, I would genuinely find it comforting.

And like the previous poster said my house is over one hundred years old, so likely people will have died here.

But in the scenario you described OP, if there had been a particularly tragic death like a suicide or murder, I would definitely be put off buying that house. Ignorance is bliss.

BarMonaco · 03/07/2025 14:22

My house is Victorian so people may well have died here. It wouldn't bother me.

K0OLA1D · 03/07/2025 14:23

Wouldn't bother me. My great nan died in my old bedroom and the HA house we first moved into had someone die in the living room. It was also an elderly woman.

I dont know how I'd feel if it was a really horrific murder but again, the dead can't hurt you.

The old owners of the house we live in now was arrested and sent down for horrific GBA and domestic violence and drugs charges, so I reckon this house has seen some scenes as well.

Donotgogentle · 03/07/2025 14:24

25 Cromwell Street or similar - that would be a no.

Otherwise it’s likely most older houses will have had someone die in them. I don’t see that as an issue.

OverheardInAWhisper · 03/07/2025 14:24

Myrobalanna · 03/07/2025 14:19

Surely anywhere you live that isn't brand spanking new, there's a likelihood that someone will have died there?

Sorry about your dad, what a hard thing. x

This. I know from someone whose family lived in my house for over 100 years, and who did a lot of research, that about 30 people at least have died in it, from babies and children to a woman in childbirth to old people. There was also quite a famous murder. It doesn’t make me feel any differently about it.

I also lived for a while in my student days as a lodger in a house where the owner’s parents had both died by suicide on the premises together. I was sad for him (he lived there too), but it wasn’t soaked into the walls, only into him as a trauma he was dealing with.

I’m sorry for your loss, OP. I hope you have good support.

Donotgogentle · 03/07/2025 14:24

Sorry about your Dad op.

3peassuit · 03/07/2025 14:25

That must have been so difficult for you and your mother. I understand why she wanted to move.
I live in a house that’s around 600 years old. I’m sure many people have died here and a skeleton was uncovered about 30 years ago. It’s never bothered me at all.

NotISaidTheCat · 03/07/2025 14:27

My house is Victorian and was also a care home at one point in its history, so I'm certain people have died here. It doesn't bother me, but a violent death would if I knew about it.

user8429706521 · 03/07/2025 14:27

We built our house. In the 18yrs we’ve been here one person has died and two born, all in the same room!
If a house has any sort of age to it, it’s inevitable that many people will have entered and left within its walls. Only fairly recently we routinely hospitalised people for births and deaths, so wouldn’t worry me. Having said that, I’d think twice if I knew of a violent murder.

MaryGreenhill · 03/07/2025 14:28

Very sorry for your loss@ExcellentMother.
To answer your question.
No , it wouldn't bother me at all .

Thatsrhesummeroverthen · 03/07/2025 14:29

It would in this situation, yes, as I would think about it when I used that part of the house. I've lived somewhere where I know the owner died sitting in his living room, that did not affect me the same though. (Editing to add, of old age)
im really sorry for your loss.

Noshadowsinthedark · 03/07/2025 14:30

I’m so sorry to read this OP. Very understandably to want to move given the trauma experienced there. Sending love. (I know, not the done thing on Mumsnet)

I always go off the vibe a house gives. There has been the odd one we have looked at that just felt wrong but I have no idea what happened there.

Less traumatic deaths wouldn’t bother me but more traumatic ones probably would. Just like you can tell if you’re in a room with someone aggressive or depressed, I think the feeling might linger.

Alltheyellowbirds · 03/07/2025 14:35

So sorry about your dad. That must have been awful.

I’ve always lived in old houses that dozens of people will have died in never gave it any thought.

if it was the house of a famous murderer with bodies under the patio that might feel different.

Buiderswoe · 03/07/2025 14:35

My first flat was about 20 years old, so relatively new. One day just after I moved in the old lady across the stairs told me she was pleased someone young had moved in because she didn’t want anyone else dying in block. Apparently the poor women before me had died in the bath and been there for weeks and the smell in the hallway was upsetting the other tenants 🙁

I refurbed that bathroom pretty darn quick! But it never really bothered me. The neighbour (who was a bit batty) often used to stop by and say…”good to see you are still with us!”

zinrlow · 03/07/2025 14:37

A murder took place in my house, the father killed his wife and children around 50 years ago. I thought it’d really bother me but it surprisingly doesn’t at all

Ageismlives · 03/07/2025 14:38

I'm sorry sorry about your Dad OP.

Like pp I've lived in older houses so Ive always assumed there will have been deaths in them.

The house I own currently was lived in for many years by a woman well known in the neighbourhood. Even though there were 2 other owners after her and before me, it's still her people talk about. So ive had numerous tales of how ill she was with chronic lung disease and about her carers coming in during the day and to put her to bed. I dont know if she died in the house or not - probably- but I must admit I find it a bit depressing at night thinking of her being here alone and so desperately ill. I actually find that a bit disturbing as i live here alone.

TheGriffle · 03/07/2025 14:39

A recent, tragic/violent death might put me off but not the possibility of older deaths in a 100 year old house.

DMil died at home in their back bedroom after an illness, I could never step foot in that room again knowing and seeing her in there. I’d never live in that house knowing that but that’s more personal.

TwoFastHorses · 03/07/2025 14:40

My house was built in the late 1700’s. I think there’s a good chance that lots of people have died in it. My Dad died at home in the family home that my Mum still lives in. Doesn’t bother any of us. Death is a part of life.

Octavia64 · 03/07/2025 14:41

No.

I would assume in any old house somebody had died there to be honest.

ElCorazon · 03/07/2025 14:43

Why are people bothered by this? How is it relevant that someone died in a house? People die all the time in all kinds of places.

TheCurious0range · 03/07/2025 14:44

My house was built in 1912 almost certain multiple people will have died here and there was probably some goings on that we wouldn't find palatable today. Doesn't bother me