“ Didn’t Want To Read & Run”

[RabbitsRock]

Please please stop posting this! It’s pointless! The OP would have no idea if you had just read their post without commenting or not! The phrase drives me crazy! Comment or don’t comment!

I agree with say something else.

We all interpret things differently but to me it reads as quite self-important.

'I'm sooo busy but look at me sparing you a bit of my time'.

I agree. I actually find it quite moving that there are people out there who are moved enough by a stranger's post on Mumsnet that they don't want to scroll on by without letting the poster know that there is someone out there thinking of them.

So why not just post a normal reply instead of letting them know they're sparing them their time?

It annoys me as well.

But what really annoys me is people who endlessly quote the original post and then reply. We all know what we are commenting on. It’s even more annoying when the original post is a long one.

@TinyTempesti don’t think the reference to ‘running’ is anything to do with claiming to be busy or important. It could just as easily say ‘turn my back’ or ‘head off without a word’… it’s the idea of reading and then just pissing off as if it didn’t matter to you. ‘Read and run’ has probably stuck because it’s simple (one syllable each) and the alliteration makes it a nice phrase too.

and yes if there is any rush element, maybe it does acknowledge the reality of the modern world - everyone’s attention is constantly skipping and especially online we bounce from one thing to another at lightening speed as if it doesn’t matter. To me, this phrase is just saying ‘you matter… So I’m pausing and telling you that, even though I don’t have much of use to say.’

i would be interested if OPs who had posted a thread, were feeling very low and needing support had found that phrase unhelpful in response …. But it seems to be mostly prickly bystanders who are responding to this badly.

I don't run and read. I might bump into things while not looking.
Hope that clears that up.

But they don't have to say anything about their own personal situation because it's not about them.

A simple reply is all that's needed or if they're incredibly busy, just log off.

I agree. It’s meaningless.

The OP would have no idea if you had just read their post without commenting or not!

I think you have misunderstood OP. It's not about the fact the OP may know you've read the post and not commented, it's more that the person reading perceived that the OP is in a difficult spot or feeling low and wants to acknowledge the post in case that helps the OP know they're not alone.

Yes, even if they don’t have the specialist knowledge the OP is seeking.

I agree. They could just say I hear you but don't have much advice. Hope someone else has.

Yep, so annoying! Just say “so sorry to hear this, sending good thoughts” or similar - that would mean more surely

'I'm sorry to hear this OP'

That would do the same job and it's actually quicker.

The OP doesn't need to know how busy a stranger is.

Totally agree!

The trite "thinking of you", which someone has suggested, sounds like a bereavement sympathy card to me.

(I find it much more annoying when people write "please please" as if they’re a child…)

I’ve never interpreted it as having anything to do with how busy the writer is. "I’m sorry to hear this" sounds like classic non-committal therapy-speak to me.

"I hear you" - ugh!

The “please please” was out of desperation not childishness! 🤣

Well many people are genuinely sorry to hear/read something upsetting.

And I still think it's better than making it about the poster 'reading and running', rather than the OP and their problem.

YABVVVVVU. It's not up to you to police what people say!

It's nice that people didn't just read and run but we're able to explain why it's not a useless phrase.

Agree with the posters that this only happens on highly emotional threads. You won’t see it on a ‘should I buy a slushie maker or a candy floss machine’. This is a forum for women, and many find themselves in desperate situations. Sometimes being seen and heard is enough, not every post needs to be a personal experience.

Fine. That’s the response you can type, then. But I still don’t understand why you object to others wording their responses differently.

I daresay, but I find it irritating, just like you find "didn’t want to read and run" irritating!

I agree with this

I didn't want to read and run but I disagree...