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Being told if you don't like the rules maybe the job is not for you. Legal?

35 replies

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:02

Posting on behalf of my sister. She was very honest with me on her behaviour.
She has worked behind the bar of a private members club.
Started June 2024 so less than 2 years.
She is a very vocal person and has started to assert herself questioning everything.
( I know her and can imagine how she acts )
Last night she was advised that maybe the job is not for her if she can't follow the rules made by the committee. But was also told that she is a good worker and they don't want to loose her as long as she follows the rules.

I've advised her to just do the job and keep her mouth shut. As she has worked for less than 2 years they can get rid when they want.

Am I right.

OP posts:
Tootrad · 27/06/2025 16:04

Do you honestly not see the relevance of what “rules” you are talking about here?

Courgettezuchinni · 27/06/2025 16:05

So she's had a verbal warning about her behaviour - nothing formally in writing?

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 27/06/2025 16:05

If its legal probably depends on the rules.

But yes, assuming they're not telling her she needs to go down on the members then its not unreasonable to say that if you dont like the rules the job may not be a good fit.

Laughingontheinside · 27/06/2025 16:08

Well, under 2 years employment then yes, she could be let go for no reason at all and it would be entirely legal.

As for her behaviour, it would depend on the rules she’s questioning. Being told to serve underage or drunk customers would clearly be wrong. Making sure she uses clean glasses to serve people would be right. And all shades of grey in between.

Different industry, but I had to have this conversation with a new colleague as she was actually breaking some of the fairly strict workflow rules we have because she felt like it. This could compromise customer safety and despite this being explained, she felt she knew better. So she was let go. Some rules do need to be followed.

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:09

It seems that a snooker team was visiting and they were given discount on the drinks the same as a member for the cup match.
I tried to explain that if the team weren't playing against another team there would be no game and these visitors wouldn't be in the club.
This is just one thing she was complaining about.

OP posts:
Tootrad · 27/06/2025 16:10

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:09

It seems that a snooker team was visiting and they were given discount on the drinks the same as a member for the cup match.
I tried to explain that if the team weren't playing against another team there would be no game and these visitors wouldn't be in the club.
This is just one thing she was complaining about.

Bloody hell op

NOT. Her business who the hell the business gives a discount to.

How old is your sister?

Does she have something of a rather chequered career history?

Redflagsabounded · 27/06/2025 16:11

Even after 2 years if she fails to follow reasonable management instructions like that one, argues and is a pain in the arse (especially if in front of customers, she could end up being dismissed perfectly legally. It sounds as though she's had a verbal warning. It not her job to decide the rules.

Ponderingwindow · 27/06/2025 16:12

Did management give a discount and she complained or did she give an unauthorized discount?

MidnightPatrol · 27/06/2025 16:14

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:09

It seems that a snooker team was visiting and they were given discount on the drinks the same as a member for the cup match.
I tried to explain that if the team weren't playing against another team there would be no game and these visitors wouldn't be in the club.
This is just one thing she was complaining about.

Ha ha.

Why does she think her opinion on this is of interest to her employer?

notsochattysue · 27/06/2025 16:17

how do her colleagues feel about her opinions? I only ask because we used to work with a girl like this. She was a PITA.

id agree. Tell her to do her job and go home. None of her business who gets discount and who doesn’t.

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:20

She wouldn't give the discount to the visiting team.

My sister has had more jobs than Ive had hot dinners.
Don't ask about her relationships.
Of course everything is someone else's problem.

I love her but my goodness she is mouthy.
Eldest child.

OP posts:
MrTiddlesTheCat · 27/06/2025 16:21

Sounds like your sister needs to pipe down if she wants to keep her job.

Littap · 27/06/2025 16:22

What a bizarre hill for her to die on, this has nothing to do with her, give the discount and move on. Sounds like she basically wants to move on from the job and for some reason wants to be fired rather than just leaving.

Ilikewinter · 27/06/2025 16:22

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:20

She wouldn't give the discount to the visiting team.

My sister has had more jobs than Ive had hot dinners.
Don't ask about her relationships.
Of course everything is someone else's problem.

I love her but my goodness she is mouthy.
Eldest child.

Sounds like she's about to lose this one to!

thatsawhopperthatlemon · 27/06/2025 16:23

If she doesn't like doing what her employer tells her to do, and is arguing the toss with them about it, then no wonder they said what they did. She is not in charge, and it is not for her to decide whether she agrees with the rules or not. I think they have been quite reasonable in what they said.

AngelofIslington · 27/06/2025 16:24

I think, given the example you’ve given, they don’t want to sack her, they want her to realise she’s an employee who should be doing what the management is asking her to do. The example is not really something she should be complaining about.
I think they’ve been quite reasonable saying these are our rules, if you don’t like them you are free to leave.

whitewineandsun · 27/06/2025 16:24

Seems reasonable to say that to her. I probably would have, too.

xhines · 27/06/2025 16:28

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:20

She wouldn't give the discount to the visiting team.

My sister has had more jobs than Ive had hot dinners.
Don't ask about her relationships.
Of course everything is someone else's problem.

I love her but my goodness she is mouthy.
Eldest child.

Sounds like you’re just on here to slag her off. Nice.

Ponderingwindow · 27/06/2025 16:29

I’m surprised she didn’t get fired on the spot. Those kind of tournaments are easy money makers. Short term extra customers who are in a recreational, aka spending mood.

upandleftthenright · 27/06/2025 16:31

@xhinesWell, that’s what I’d say 80% of MN is about tbh

WhatDidIComeInThisRoomFor · 27/06/2025 16:34

What a bizarre “rule” to kick off about. It’s hardly unethical or dodgy is it. Why on earth does she think she can overrule the committee who run the place on something like that? She sounds like a complete PITA and I’m surprised they can be bothered keeping her on.

BobbleHatsRule · 27/06/2025 16:35

xhines · 27/06/2025 16:28

Sounds like you’re just on here to slag her off. Nice.

Maybe she is exasperated with picking up the pieces for someone who is to blame for their situation?

Viviennemary · 27/06/2025 16:36

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:09

It seems that a snooker team was visiting and they were given discount on the drinks the same as a member for the cup match.
I tried to explain that if the team weren't playing against another team there would be no game and these visitors wouldn't be in the club.
This is just one thing she was complaining about.

Why is this any of her business.

YourLoyalPlumOP · 27/06/2025 16:37

Proudofthem · 27/06/2025 16:02

Posting on behalf of my sister. She was very honest with me on her behaviour.
She has worked behind the bar of a private members club.
Started June 2024 so less than 2 years.
She is a very vocal person and has started to assert herself questioning everything.
( I know her and can imagine how she acts )
Last night she was advised that maybe the job is not for her if she can't follow the rules made by the committee. But was also told that she is a good worker and they don't want to loose her as long as she follows the rules.

I've advised her to just do the job and keep her mouth shut. As she has worked for less than 2 years they can get rid when they want.

Am I right.

yup

as long as it isn’t distributing yes they can get rid for any reason

Ormally · 27/06/2025 16:38

The parts that make you a good worker, performing well at (most of) work, don't usually cancel out the parts that show the opposite of that. A lot of people would be able to think of behaviour examples in colleagues that bear this out.

Rules made by the committee should be the expectation where it is possible and not to her detriment to follow them. If she was being asked, for example, to log in to a previous jobholder's server account to process online transactions or hit a discount button, because she hasn't been given an individual one - that's the kind of thing that I would push back on, because it has potential to screw me over thanks to the committee if anything goes badly wrong.