Pooing in public loos - yes or no?

[samarrange]

Inspired by about half of the posts in this thread (which is basically on a different topic, but its OP mentioned public loos and things kept, er, moving).

It seems that MN is totally split on whether having a poo in a public loo (or, presumably, a pub, the library, the office, anywhere that isn't your home or your hotel) is either "the worst thing imaginable", or "completely normal, what's all the fuss about?".

What is this MN obsession with poo?

There was a recent thread by an OP wanting her H to poo in the ensuite , followed by a thread on an OP wanting her H to poo at work. And now this???

Absolutely crazy .

I don’t poo outside of the house unless I’m unwell or something (obviously on holidays etc I go in the accommodation, but if I was going out for the day I just wouldn’t need to poo), my body just knows to wait till I get home, so it’s not something I have to really consider. I guess it’s a ‘safe space’ thing and my bum clenches shut if I’m not in a safe toileting space. I just never need to go when out for a few hours or the day. But obviously I would use a public toilet over shitting myself.

How can you not understand that people are different and not everyone is like you? I don't have any sort of bowel condition, or illness, but I can sometimes go from feelng like I could do with going, to being absolutely desperate within 10-15 minutes. Once I'm at complete desperation it's either get to a toilet within a few minutes or yes, I would soil myself. There is no way I could wait a few hours till work ends and I get home.

Very occasionally have I had to do that but only if I have been really took short and can hardly walk, I routinely go about every three days but no set time so I hope it doesn't coincide with when I'm out. It has only happened a very few times. DH doesn't care and thinks I'm odd as I don't like to use any loo

Coprophilia maybe.

Absolutely, it’s intriguing to me that some people don’t because I just don’t understand what happens if you need to? If I need a poo, I need a poo. Whether I’m in Tesco, at work, in a restaurant, a shopping centre…if I need one I need one!

Well that would explain it.
Not quite the explanation I was expecting I must admit!

Surely that is what toilets are for!

God I love MN. So much batshittery here I didn't even know existed! Several toilet-related uber-angsty things.

Apparently, pooing in public loos is somehow shameful, uncouth and un-ladylike. Letting tradesmen to use your loo can cause heart attacks or at least palpitations. Owning a loo brush? Pass the smelling salts.

To answer the question: I prefer my own home or a hotel I'm staying in ideally. But if I'm out and about and I have to go - then I have to go! So what's the done thing - shitting your pants? That's somehow more ladylike? 😆Ok ok, 'hold it in'. Great if you can. But what if you can't? Or - hell - don't want to?

A toilet is made for doing your business. As long as it has a door for privacy, toilet paper and a sink to wash your hands - I'm good.

I've trekked and camped for weeks at a time. I've travelled for months in countries where Western toilets are few and far between. I use whatever's available for whatever needs doing, up to and including a hole in the ground and a bush.

It's a toilet. It's for shitting in. I find the number of MNers who have massive hangups about basic bodily functions fascinating and sad.

Omg, same here! Happy to admit I am very jealous that some people seem to be able to go through life without worrying about where the nearest loo is 😭

I'm another with IBS and if I've got to go, I've got no choice. I used to have very severe urgency problems; a combination of holding back and a major gynae issue trained my bowel in the other direction and I'm now prone to diabolical constipation, which has caused me problems more excruciating than the urgency, (which I'm still prone to sometimes.) I didn't think that was even possible, but it is. My habit now is to go whenever I get an opportunity, to get into a long queue for the loo slightly ahead of need, establish where the facilities are when I go anywhere unfamiliar and to never leave the house without a supply of paper hankies. Being shy about these things is a luxury I just don't have.

I'm sure it's not really that!

Same here!

I simply can't go anywhere unless it's my toilet. It's probably a mental thing as my Mum and Nan used to say the same.
I remember my first holidays abroad that needed a flight... I'd build up all this gas up on the flight... The weather would be beautiful, the company was wonderful, the food was exquisite...

Did I want to eat any of it, did I want to walk or swim? Did I heck. I just needed a massive shit (sorry). What a miserable time it made for.

Pretty much as soon as the key went in the door when home... Bathroom and relax...

I was late teens early 20s those days and seeking out pharmacies for laxative was not the done thing. I did it brave it once... Explained in my best Franglais... Ah Ducolax - Oui! Merci! Well whatever strength they gave me made sure I was occupying the bathroom all night, feeling like in childbirth and just generally having a worse time.

I've had to retrain my brain as last year was 2 week AI with my teen daughter - at least she understood my issue and 3rd time on resort, local pharmacy brilliant, plus being more mature made it all slightly more comfortable, but it was still an issue to go in the apartment - definitely no way could I have gone anywhere else.

I have stage fright with weeing too!

A recent pelvic MRI for uterus picked up
Diverticulosis. I didn't surprise me.

Generally avoid it if possible but not always possible! I poo in the morning before leaving the house so mostly wouldn't need to go again in the day, unless the IBS kicks off!

Personally,I try not to! I like to relax and take my time and you definitely can't do that in a public toilet! But I'm lucky in that my bowels are pretty well behaved and don't have a habit of making me use a public toilet! But.... if you've gotta go,you've gotta go! I certainly wouldn't judge anyone who did!

OP here... the reason I asked was because the reactions on the other thread were so polarised. Basically half of them were "OMG you poo in public toilets, are you insane?" and the other half were "You refuse to poo in public toilets? What's wrong with you?".

It reminds me of the when I discovered that lots of people have an inner monologue. I don't, and it would never have occurred to me that people might have one. But to those who do, it often doesn't occur that some people might not. I think that almost anything that exposes us to the way that others think is probably good.

Actually @Iscumaliom whilst saying same here (!) I hadn't read your post fully and we appear quite different. I don't want you to think I'm likening my bowel habits to yours. Shy would be nice. Social phobia vergining on agoro... Not so.

This is like it used to be going round my Nan's house 🤣 Gawd help anyone if she had her friend round.

Tea Nan? Lovely. Friend, tell Nan all when Ive left. Im delicate.
Ooh sorry I forgot you were delicate. You youngster (30).

Worked though.

Holding in poo on occasion is not harmful, but doing this often can lead to constipation, impaction, inflammation, and more severe complications. People who hold in their poo too often may start to lose the urge to go, which may result in fecal incontinence.

I'm a runner, I'm very happy to see public toilets!

My DCs seem to stack it up for home. Yippee.

It's healthy to let it out (where practical!) when you have an urge. Holding it in for prolonged periods is not a healthy habit.

I prefer not to, but if you have to go, you have to go. Sometimes it just can't be held in until you're home.

People don’t have an inner monologue…?!?? What’s going on inside your head? Is it just silence all the time? I’m so intrigued….

Only if really needed.

ok thread police...
and what OP's done isn't really what's meant by TAAT - that's usually talking (bitching) about another thread, not using one discussion as a jumping off point for a related topic.

OP I find the options a bit confusing because surely everyone only goes for a poo when they have to? It's not really a fun enjoyable activity that you'd plan your day out around! Like 'Ooh, looking forward to meeting Anna in town later, nip to Primark before it gets busy, go round a few more shops, might treat myself to a nice coffee and a poo in John Lewis, then few more shops and a cheeky wine with lunch before getting the train home!'

For me it's both "sure it's no biggie but only when I have to," as in I wouldn't stop what I was doing on a day out to try and squeeze one out for the fun of it.

Also I was surprised on another thread where multiple people said normal for them was only going once or twice a week! Which will obviously affect how normal/necessary you view out-of-house-pooing to be.