How do people with right-wing views still have loads of friends?

[AmusedTaupePlayer]

Genuine question. There’s a guy at work who’s openly right-wing—thinks Brexit was great, doesn’t care about immigrants, women’s rights, gay or disabled people, constantly posts pro-Trump, Reform UK, and even likes Andrew and Tristan Tate. His dad’s the same, his mum is obsessed with “Britishness”. Basically, the full red-flag package.
Yet... he’s well-liked at work, always invited to drinks and group holidays. People act like he’s totally harmless. How?! I don’t get how someone with views that are basically hostile to entire groups of people can still be so socially accepted. Why don’t people care? He isn't actually shy about them... he openly declares them.

I don't care for an opinion of a man like that.

I doubt he cares very much for your opinions either.

Birds of a feather flock together…

He sounds hard going. Maybe he is kind on a personal level. But most people are a sort of patchwork quilt. They might love Brexit yet support the NHS or nationalising railways. Or building council housing.They might strongly support gay rights but favour capital punishment. This is annoying for political geeks like me ...I like more consistency. But I've learned to meet people where they are. Nowt so rum as folk.

So true. Some of the nastiest people I have ever met have been left-wing.

When I was a young, I belonged to left-wing groups. I thought being left-wing meant being good. Then I met the reality. Some were nice, of course, but many of them were vile. They were like the deranged members of a cult. But what struck me most was the hatred. So many left-wing people are angry, bitter and misanthropic. For some reason (marriage breakdown, sexual problems, social awkwardness, financial failure, etc, etc) they have a rage and bitterness towards the world. They especially hate those who are settled and happy – people with a nice house, a stable marriage, a couple of kids. Frankie Boyle is a good example of this type. Though they claim to care about 'the poor', they're really motivated by hatred of 'the rich' (by which they mean anyone who owns property). Whereas the best conservatives want to conserve what is good (great art, beautiful buildings, the literary canon), the left are driven by a childish urge to smash things up.

This is why so many left-wing people support mass immigration and open borders. Every sensible person knows these boatloads of young men are not genuine refugees. Even the left know it. And everyone knows the student visa system is being exploited. But the left see mass immigration as a way of shaking things up. They know it disrupts lives, and that's why they support it. My village has been destroyed by developers. My local woods have been hacked down, a giant estate has been built at the other end of the village, and now the fields in the centre of the village are being built on as well. At least half the people who've moved onto these new estates are immigrants. And the left love this. People like Frankie Boyle are delighted to think of all those horrible middle-class, Daily Mail reading homeowners having their lives ruined.

👏👏👏

If you ONLY spend time with people who fully agree with you, you are living in an echo chamber.

People are not one-dimensional. I'm fairly left-wing and I think it's incredibly dangerous the way that left wing people brand Tory and Reform voters 'scum'. Every person is a complex combination of thoughts, feelings, opinions, experiences. Nothing shuts down discourse faster than someone else looking down on you and with no discourse there's no hope of anything changing.

The others answer your question of why a bigot has friends. It's okay to be judgy of bigots, but if you dismiss the vast majority of the other answers in that way, that's it's own kind of closed mindedness and all part of the problem.

Why should i tolerate a bigot

I joined my local Conservative club when moving to a new area, many years ago now, because I was interested in their local green belt campaign. I also started volunteering at the local hospice. There was considerable overlap between the two groups, especially the women.

The left does not have a monopoly on kindness, despite so many (like the OP) being convinced it does.

You don't have to. You asked why other people tolerate him and got lots of good explanations/reasons why, which you're dismissing. That's what I'm referring to. You seem very fixed in your thinking and unable to engage in the wider debate. If all you want to do is point out how you won't tolerate a bigot, good for you. There's nothing more to say.

@AmusedTaupePlayer Given that Trump won, Brexit won and Reform got loads of votes, I'm mystified as to why you find it hard to believe that someone who supports these things has friends. Lots of people support these things. Like it or not, they are mainstream views. And there are even people who don't support these things who don't mind having friends with different opinions to themselves.

Because you have to work with him, and if you refuse to behave like a grown up because you disagree with his political opinions, you are the one who will be in the wrong.

You don't have to socialise with him but if you make it a problem at work you won't be doing yourself any favours.

OP you sound intolerant of other's views. No wonder the bloke at work has more mates.

You can disagree with someone's political views and still like them as a person. The ongoing culture wars have made everyone political. I don't consider myself to be "left wing" or "right wing". I don't believe those things exist. We all want the best for ourselves and our loved ones. No two people have exactly the same opinion on everything.

I don't think it's right that as a country, England rewards people who enter our country illegally with hotel accommodation. I was recently speaking to a bus driver who told me that if someone is unable to speak our language, they are given a concessionary travel card, at the cost of the tax payer. It doesn't seem fair.

I think that as a developed country, we should support individuals who are struggling overseas where we can. But we have, to a great extent and to the detriment of the wellbeing of our own citizens and as a small island, enough is enough.

Some other countries don't share our ethics on equality for women. I don't think people can be blamed for addressing concerns over ideology that compromises our Equality Act.

I believe that "Brexit" is being used as an excuse for the problems in the country today to hide something else that's going on, those who are awake to it will know what I'm saying. It's smoke and mirrors and I don't trust any politician, be they a Conservative, Labour or Liberal Democrat member.

If your colleague is kind to you and respectful, why wouldn't you like him? Do you have to be of the same opinion on every subject as someone to befriend them?

To be honest, you don't sound much different to him.

Wow. The superiority complex in you is something else. You are strutting around like you’ve cracked the code to moral righteousness—except… you’re wrong. Loud and wrong.
He pays taxes. I pay taxes. You pay taxes. Which means, like it or not, we're all financially supporting people we can't stand. Congratulations, you're not special.
And let’s be real: the guy’s not harming anyone. If anything, he’s carrying himself with more dignity and self-awareness than the pearl-clutching crowd frothing at the mouth to tear him down.
If you’re gonna cast stones, at least check that your own house isn’t made of smug little glass panels first.
You can't stand people who don't support what you support. He can't stand people who don't support what he supports.
You can’t tolerate anyone who doesn’t back your views. He can’t tolerate anyone who doesn’t back his.
Congratulations—you're exactly the same, just shouting from opposite ends of the hypocrisy spectrum.

That didn't answer the question? Are you writing an article or just going to keep posting a new thread until you can get people to agree with you?

BTW--You sound very intolerant of any viewpoint but your own. I could not be close to someone like you whose mind is closed tighter than a steel bear trap. Just saying.

I hope you get the enough "nod-alongs" for your article or whatever you aim happens to be.

This. Presuming you are down south - maybe not, but I’m in the north and I own a business in a very wealthy demographical area - think footballers, surgeons, pilots, and so on. Brings me into contact with different people all day, every day. Most of them feel some of what you are outlining - not so much the gay and disabled points but uncontrolled immigration and where their taxes are going, is absolutely incensing people.

When I was young and foolish i hung around with far lefties thinking that those men who claimed to want change would stand up for womens' rights -until i realised they thought women should sleep with them, make the tea and shut up, and they were often racist and anti-semitic. They are even worse now, pretending that men can be women because we are only an idea in mens' heads. Refusing to put a stop to cousin marriage, Sharia law and the animal cruelty that is Halal and caring more about Hamas driven Palestinians than the massacre of Israelis. In spite of 2 left wing governments in my life time women still don't have equal pay, and misogyny and violence against women and girls has got worse. Men still mostly get away with rape. So who am i supposed to believe in, and vote for exactly?

Some of the most intolerant people I have ever met are those firmly on the left. The left is home to some incredibly close minded, nasty, intolerant characters. I'm not surprised your 'awful right wing' associate has plenty of friends.

Nobody is all bad or all good. I can’t believe the naïveté of a post like this. You could argue that to castigate someone as worthless and not worthy of human friendship just because they don’t share your worldview is the most fascist position anyone could take.

The ones I know of are really unpopular.

If you’ve lived through two Labour governments you’ve lived through decades of Conservative and they haven’t either!

And the idea of women in right wing men often means being anti immigration while marrying nice compliant women from other countries.

Not saying leftie men are great but right wing men aren’t good for women either.

Nail on the head. By definition half the population are right of centre as are half the population left of centre. Of course, within each half there are degrees, most will be fairly moderate, a minority will be extreme. Someone moderately left will have no problem with being friends/colleagues with someone moderately right. It's only the extreme rights that will have a problem with the extreme lefts.