Would you let this man help?

[Whiteframe]

A very old story, in a nutshell, long standing married male friend has recently declared "feelings" for me.

He was drunk, I told him not to be daft and when I've seen him since (never alone) it's been as if it never happened. Good.

I live alone and am, I think, pretty independent, but as a single person, I do have a network of people to ask when I need help/advice. All the things where the combined skills and knowledge, or an extra pair of hands in a couple make a big difference, even if you don't really notice it when you're part of a couple. I do reciprocate!

This man is my car man. I have a small problem with my car and I've asked for his advice on what part I need to fix it. I can probably do it myself, although it will undoubtedly take much longer than it would for a more competent person and I may end up having to admit defeat.

He's offered to pop round this evening and do it, reckons it will take him 20mins...

You’re playing with fire and you know it

This is actually a very good idea! Do this and it’s a win-win situation!

Seems simple to me. If you don't fancy him then yes - have him round to fix car (provided you trust him not to make a move on you).
If you DO fancy him then don't.

It's a friendship group and they trade / share skills, like, you know, friends do.

Some crazy responses on here. I assume they are from the brigade who never open the front door to anyone or answer the phone or let anyone visit their baby until the baby is six months old.

Take absolutely no notice, OP. Ask him to do it but ask a friend to call round as well. In fact I'd have her there before he arrived.

I think it's great that you are part of a group that shares skills but he's obviously wanting to share a bit more! I most definitely would not invite him round to my house to fix my car, I'm assuming you are friends with his wife too and it's a bit of a betrayal of her to invite him round to yours after he's made his feelings known to you. He will see it as a sign of encouragement and so would she if she ever found out. Even if you have another friend there, he'll probably think they turned up unannounced and have ruined your plans for you and him to be alone together. It's great having a skill sharing friendship group like this but, sadly, when someone oversteps the mark, like he has done, then I wouldn't see him as someone I could ask for help from again. He'll soon get the message if you take your car to a garage and rebuff any offers of help from him.