Thread 18 - TalkLair: "That's no moon. It's a space station!"

[RasaSayangEh]

(Previous thread 17)

We've had our heatwave - is this it for the summer? All is lush and green in our LairGarden, flowers are blooming, berries are ripening...

In the TalkLair, all the windows are open, the Pimms is chilled, the MN massive salad is ready to serve. The denizens of the lair are a welcoming bunch, always eager for general chit-chat on all manner of topics. We just won’t mention the gnawed bones of our prey over there in the corner of the cave…

Sorry to hear of your dad, vegemiteandhoneyontoast. All I can say is that 90 is a very good age. Many condolences.

My aunt died aged 79, during Covid. She was massive in my and my sisters' lives, ir really was the end of an era.

I'm so sorry, vegemite. May his memory be a blessing.

Even when expected, death hits you hard. I'm sorry for your loss, @Vegemiteandhoneyontoast

So sorry @Vegemiteandhoneyontoast

I'm so sorry, @Vegemiteandhoneyontoast. Losing a much-loved dad is like being kicked in the stomach, so take care of yourself.

There is a curious divide in my family in how people are reacting. I have six siblings; me, my twin and half sister are very philosophical and calm about losing our dad, given that he was both ancient and very frail, but the others are distraught. Interesting how different people can be.

I'm sorry for your loss @Vegemiteandhoneyontoast

It is strange how different people can be. My wife was a lot more upset about my mum's death than me. I guess I see it like a marathon, I have my whole life to grieve for my mum and to keep her memory alive into the next generation with my DD and DN.

If I was more sad and upset then OK I'd deal with that, but I don't need to be any which way but how I am.

@BezMills you carry your mum with you in your DNA, which is comforting to think of.

We went to my daughter's classmate's funeral today. The crem was full and about 200 of us were outside in freezing, driving rain.

It was a lovely, non religious service, he had a wicker coffin, my heart dropped to see such a small one. It was wicker, daughter said he was environment mad, picking up litter, telling litter louts to pick up.

The speech was given by his mother, who never quavered, I don't know how. One bit which stuck was a bit about how he shared sweets with his 17 year old sister, (he was 12) he'd pick out all the ones she didn't like and give her the ones she did like.

Even though he disliked the same ones.

There were (I think) 6 girls present and none of them cried, only boys.

That must have been so, so tough, Sinner.

A family friend put himself under a train last week. We are all in shock. And for everyone directly involved, it's a life sentence.

God, isn't it? that's awful, Squeaky, so sorry to hear.

We have a dual-carriageway A-road between us and the village, with pedestrian lights at a junction. I sometimes stand there, watching a massive lorry thundering down (well over the speed limit) to catch the lights, and think "It would just be so easy ..." But then I think of the poor bloody lorry driver. The same goes for train drivers.

There's always Morocco, @Gonners !

A poem by someone called Phil from Long Island who shared it with his poetry class.

Afterthought
fuck the poets of the past, my friends.
there are no beautiful suicides
just cold corpses with shit in their pants
& the end of the gifts.

Catching up after Mumsnet and my phone not being friends this last few days.

Condolences @Vegemiteandhoneyontoast - even though 90 is a great age it’s still a sad loss.

And awful news about your family friend @SqueakyDinosaur- that must be such a shock and so hard for his family.

Shocking news, @SqueakyDinosaur so sorry to hear that.

That boy sounds like such a nice lad, @SinnerBoy what a terribly sad thing to happen.

A nice thing - my older brother is a film maker and is in the process of making one about our dad. He's done several interviews with him, one filmed and others recorded, where he talks about his early life, so we hear his voice and see him looking well and sounding his old eloquent self.

Oh God, I'm so sorry to hear that. Suicide is always such a horror for those left behind.

Huge sympathies, squeaky, that sounds awful for you all.

I'm impressed by everyone's stoicism at the funeral, sinner. I cry very easily at such things, and whilst I don't see this as bad in any way, I find it hugely inconvenient and distracting. I aspire to be like those kids, facing a hard event and a hard loss honestly.

Commiserations to all who’ve lost people they love recently but especially Squeaky. Their poor, poor, family.

@Vegemiteandhoneyontoast the film sounds like a lovely thing to have (and also reminds me that I haven’t watched the film about a friend’s dad that I really meant to; must do that).

@SinnerBoy it sounds like the funeral was a success in so far as these things can be; well done to all for holding it together. Such sad circumstances; it sounds like he was a lovely boy.

What horrible news @SqueakyDinosaur Just heartbreaking.

@SinnerBoy it's so very sad, I don't know what else to say

In an (inappropriate) attempt to raise spirits, let me tell you my inappropriate behaviour at funeral stories, starting with my lovely dad's. He died (far too young, of cancer) and had firm views on funerals: he wanted a direct cremation, and very specifically did not want any sort of religious ceremony. Obviously Mommie Dearest disregarded this and duly organised something at the local crem's chapel.She spoke to their CofE vicar (who didn't know any of us from Adam) and gave him all sorts of vague details of his life. However, she omitted one vital piece of information: he had never, ever been called by his first name but always by his middle one.

As a result, the vicar referred to him throughout as "Alfred". Nobody corrected him! My sister and I sat biting our knuckles to hold back the laughter, and thinking how much he would have enjoyed it. It was Never Mentioned!

Nice one, Gonners!

Mr Veg's uncle had a bawdy poem read out at his funeral and it was read out by a very prim and proper humanist celebrant and she looked very awkward indeed. Everyone else enjoyed it though.

The dogs, they had a meeting.
They came from near and far.
And some came in by taxi
And some came in by car.
They went into the meetinghouse
And signed the visitor's book
And each dog hung his arsehole
Upon the nearest hook.

One dog was not invited
Which caus-ed him great ire.
He stood outside the meetinghouse
And boldly shouted, "fire!"
The dogs got all excited
They didn't stop to look
And each one grabbed an arsehole
From off the nearest hook.

Now this then is my story
And it is very sore
To wear some other's arsehole
You've never worn before
And that is why when dogs meet
On land or sea or shore
Each sniffs the other's arsehole
In hopes it is his own.

Excellent poem.

My grandmother wanted a specific Shell Motor Oil jingle sung at her funeral, but we couldn't find the words so she had to make do with the more conventional words to the same tune (John Brown's Body) instead.