Do you think Mumsnet represents real life?

[NewTiger]

Is it just me who feels lot of people here say things they wouldn't say to people in real life?

I really hope it doesn't represent real life. Most of the threads I've been on become toxic very quickly. Its sad because on other (much fewer) threads there is so much support and kindness. I do think there is a huge keyboard warrior element on MN.

I dont think so

I've had some insane comments on mumsnet 😭 no way people behave this way irl

No but I suppose you are inviting opinion by posting on here. So if someone in real life approached me and said something rude it would be odd whereas if I posted something silly I had done in “am I being unreasonable” and people replied “yes you are being ridiculous” then that would be fair enough if it was ridiculous. In real life no one would tell me I was being ridiculous because I wouldn’t ask their opinion.

I’m always saddened at the lack of happy marriages/relationships, but then, maybe those people aren’t posting because they don’t need to

God no ... I now believe more than 50% of what is posted on this site is AI or otherwise fake.

Said this before but posters are exceptionally anxious. Constantly panicky.
I suppose that is all internet forums though.

I think it does to a point. In the real world some people are vile and some are lovely. There's an issue everywhere online with fuckwits. Would they say such awful things in real life? No idea. I wonder if there's any research available?

Aspects of it. I definitely agree people say things that they wouldn't say to your face, but maybe they would think it? I don't know.

There's a lot of anger on MN and I don't see that very much in my day to day life, from women. It makes me wonder if some people are absolutely boiling with it inside and you just don't know. Sometimes I'll say something and it really triggers someone in a really surprising way. The other day someone got really angry because I said, quite mildly, that I enjoyed my life - that's an interesting reaction that sometimes happens on here. People find difference to be criticism, but we're all different, aren't we, a bit anyway.

There's a lot of anxiety, too, lots of self focused criticism that looks really tiring and hard to live with. Again, I think that's not something people typically share that widely with others.

Definitely something that happens is, because we have such partial, shrouded glimpses of each other through a few words on a screen, people project a lot on to you. I have been very confidently told "facts" about myself or my life that are not true, or even close to true, on here. It's always a curious experience! That's an interesting phenomenon, as is when you see people saying things like "you are me" to relate their own experience to a previous post, even if it's not really very related at all.

I see lot of feminism, and man hating here, I don't see it in real life.

No. Lol. Most people on here claim to earn 100k and act like that's average. In the real world only a small percentage of people earn that much.

I love mumsnet but it does not represent the real world at all

Yes this. I honestly don’t know how some people get through a day. So many dilemmas could be resolved by the OP just asking the relevant person the relevant question instead of dithering and overthinking. I know very few women in real life who are as wafty as mumsnet posters.

You get that feminism and ‘man-hating’ aren’t the same thing, right?

You seem quite confused, but is what you’re asking is whether people actually hold the opinions they profess to hold on Mn?

Yes, there should be a USE YOUR WORDS stocky on top of all posts.

That, and REMEMBER THE ONLY BEHAVIOUR YOU CAN CONTROL IS YOURS would resolve about 90% of Mn dilemmas.

I’d say all life is here to some extent and what a rich tapestry it is!

Feminism and man-hating are not the same thing. Not at all.

Anyway, is MN a microcosm of real life? I doubt it. Not unless you are posting on the gardening board, or the litter tray, or about your difficult house purchase, or one or two others, in which case I suspect those do reflect real life for most people.

I hope not!

I believe they hold them, but they don't express them as openly, and there are lot of people who don't hold those opinions that are not here. It's important to realise the demographic mumsnet attracts.

I think there's a lot of feminism on the FWR boards and the Relationships board, as you'd expect. Just like there's a preponderance of cleaning on Housekeeping. That's just how topics work.

For the high earning liberal middle class, yes. Or yuppie feminism.

What opinions are you referring to, though? You mention feminism, but a lot of Mners aren’t particularly feminist, and I certainly wouldn’t see it as the defining feature of the site. As regards politics, I think it’s swung further to the centre-right in the years I’ve been on here. As regards social class, I’d say it skews LMC, but with widely variant levels of income.

What about on huge age gaps?

I'm sure there are some average people like me on here but there seems to be a disproportionate amount of people who recommend expensive shoes and clothes that most people can't afford. The fact that it is anonymous means people say things they wouldn't say in real life. Threads often turn into a digital slanging match. Love it when you get an entertaining thread where toxicity can't take hold. Have a good day all.

I’m not sure if MN is a true representation of real life at all.

Every other person seems to earn a 6 figure salary, whilst living within walking distance of lovely shops, restaurants, theatres, cafes, cinema, top schools etc etc. in C London. If looking for a house, the budget is an insane 1.5m blah blah.

Actually I don’t really know, thinking about it all. Anyone can post any anything on a public forum, but some interesting topics of debate drag me to this site. The support and empathy on a particular board I post on, is a lifeline.

It certainly does attract a seemingly large cross section of people.

I’ve always thought of Mumsnet being the antidote to Facebook world where everything is always so marvellous!

100% this. Everyone is ‘terrified’ of whatever it is they’re posting about. They’re never concerned, worried, scared or frightened. They are always terrified.