Just been fat shamed 😳

[TOWGA]

I’m a mum of 2, by 2 c sections, I was wearing a floaty dress today as it’s hot, took my youngest (who is 3) to get a ice cream and the lady serving the Ice cream, said to my daughter, your mummy looks hot with her big bump. (I’m not pregnant)
I wanted the ground to swallow me up!
im 5ft 2, carry weight on my stomach, about 66kg.
I don’t want to eat now, and feel awful, I haven’t eaten well in the last week, as I have gotten an autism diagnosis and coming to terms with that.

I'd have said oh its not a baby its too many icecreams and watched the ground swallow her up instead

As others have said she wasn’t shaming you, there was no malice behind this comment.
She made thoughtless social chit chat with your dc which included an incorrect assumption.
She would do better not to comment on people’s bodies but there was no shaming.

I don’t get it. That’s still not fat shaming.

One of my fave phrases - never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Makes it much easier to brush stuff off!

Im having terrible peri menopuase bloating in my 40s. I actually look pregnant at times esp with empire line dresses that go in too much.

Gutting and upsetting but try not to get too upset.

Have you heard of rejection sensitive dysphoria OP? It's not unusual with ASD. It might explain why you feel so upset about this, although it's never a good idea to assume someone is pregnant.

It wasn’t necessarily stupidity, either.

@Annascaulthat wasn’t my point. It was it makes it easier to brush off when you think like that.

Although commenting on any women’s body and presuming she is pregnant is pretty daft. But not malicious.

This.

It is hurtful and rude but as PP have said may just be the dress worn.

I've had opposite with third pg when it's come up in conversation that I was pg stood with group of women to be been told to my face everyone assumed I was just getting fat - not sure what reponse I was supposed to make - I couldn't get past why my weight was a topic of conversation at all and settled for a how odd statment back - and then went home and felt bloody awful.

Why on earth would anyone want to touch your tummy - let alone actually ask? I don't get it. What would that do for them or tell them? What a bizarre request. 😕

If there anything I’ve learned in two pregnancies it’s that for lots of people,
your body becomes public property when pregnant. What you eat, what you do, where you go, “let me have a feel”. Lots of people, especially older women, like to feel the baby kick. You’d be surprised how many people ask, and how many don’t ask and just do it anyway😂