Went part time due to mental health/stress.. still not coping. What do I do?

[Sulking]

I’ve spent the last 3years in a constant state of panic and stress. I’ve been in and out of high intensity therapy and am back on the waiting list yet again but have around 17 weeks to wait.

I quit my full time job after a bit of a breakdown at the end of last year; I just couldn’t cope with childcare and working. So I got a part time job; only around 10-12 hours a week so literally barely anything… but I’m still not coping.

I don’t know what to do. I feel like not working won’t help, I like to keep busy, I like the distraction sometimes. But equally I hate the commitment and the pressure to need to be at work when I feel so so low and panicked.

We also absolutely can’t afford for me to not work or reduce any hours. We’re literally below the breadline right now and have debt to pay off so I can’t just quit and see how it goes.

Im so stuck and im so worried about the strain my body and my mind are under due to my mental health.

Had anyone been in a similar boat? Where do I go from here?

@FluentLilacPombear
"'PIP is for extra costs caused by functional difficulties in mobility, dressing, taking adequate nutrition etc.
Not an extra avenue of income because someone is finding work stressful.''

Incorrect. People can and do claim for long term mental health issues.

I have no idea why you thought it was appropriate to post a snarky comment when it is obvious the OP is struggling at the moment.

@Viviennemary
''Agree. Which is why I look forward to the changes that are meant to be happening for PIP.''

Staggering level of ignorance and empathy bypass. Mental health issues are as debilitating as physical ones.

Back to you OP: I would go back to your GP to discuss going on anti-depressants. I would also book some time off work if you can to give them a chance to start working (it usually takes a couple of weeks for the meds to take effect).

Charities like Mind offer lower cost counselling session as well which you might be able to access quicker while you wait on the NHS.

There are other things you can do as well to help manage anxiety such as listening to guided meditation videos (I just go on YouTube) and try to do exercise that you enjoy to keep your mind off your issues.

I would strongly recommend taking medication to help you get to the point where talking therapy can actually work. I can’t function without both, but giving up work is not an option. Doing so would create even more stress and anxiety, so I have to manage the condition - and I do, but only through medication and therapy. I also got counselling through Occupational Health.

People have given some great advice on here. Another thing I would highly recommend is going outside everyday you don't actually have to go anywhere but just 20 minutes in the garden if you have one everyday to sit have a cup of tea and take in the fresh air honestly really helps and if your up for it walking round your garden. I truly believe if you get on medication, start talking therapy and go outside for fresh air everyday it will make a massive difference. None of it is a fix and you will still have bad patches but I think you will notice a massive improvement to where things are more manageable xx

How bad is the debt, do you have confidence it's under control or is it something you are trying not to think about? Can you do anything about it, to feel more in control there (CAB, payment plan etc)?

Otherwise it sounds like medication would really help give you the capacity to get on top of things, I wouldn't be making any work based decisions - start with medication and debt decisions.

Take care

Seriously
Get thee to the doctor and ask for propanol
It's a beta blocker ,but used for anxiety
I'm on 3 a day if I need them ,or none on a good day
It calms me down enough to function..it honestly does help

You can get pip for mental health problems
Get the forms fill them in and add lots of extra information about how your mental health effects you .

Stay in work AND work on your MH. You need to earn and you can address your health issues the rest of the week.

Agree re beta blockers.

What also helps me is swimming,I go most days ,it's exercise,I meet people,I'm getting out of the house , having a wash after ,and doing something positive for myself.
It doesn't have to be swimming for you ,a walk would have the same effect,or a run

I waited 6 weeks.

I get it ,I had a lovely nurse on the phone who apologised for the forms not being aimed at mental health,and being more for physical issues..she couldn't of been nicer ,4 weeks wait

When I was in your situation medication got me through it. My stress was work-related and had an expiry date (related to a finite project) which helped. Talking therapy didn't help me - my situation was objectively stressful, anxiety was the natural reaction to it so things like CBT weren't helpful. Specific relaxation techniques and learning how to deal with panic attacks did help.

I am now off the medication and my work is stress-free but it's taking my body and my mind years to go back to normal after that horrific time.

How will those changes benefit you? Pray tell, I am all ears.

You're wrong

OP, look at Benefits & Work for their PIP guides, good luck!
https://mail.benefitsandwork.co.uk/personal-independence-payment-pip/pip-self-test

You can agree all you want with @FluentLilacPombear, just means you are both mistaken. Odd that you feel the need to look forward to proposed changes when you seem to lack any comprehension of PIP.

I agree with all of this.

Anxiety can be debilitating, but treat it like you would treat something like a pulled muscle in your back. You need medication and therapy, whether that’s talking or physio or whatever. Giving up work and putting yourself at financial risk when you’ve haven’t treated your mental health using both approaches will just create further anxiety. Set yourself small targets each day - nothing major, just a short walk or meeting a friend for coffee - and build calming techniques into your day. The more you do them, the better the results.

Antidepressants changed my life. I was suffering from very bad depression but the anxiety had been there all my life, always worried, constant butterflies, often being able to feel my own heartbeat, missed out onto much as I was too scared. Fluoxetine was the o e that worked for me. I felt calm, then I gained confidence. Learned to drive in my late 30s, moved on from a job I had been in since I was 19, got a promotion. Not having constant anxiety is wonderful but I don't think I'd have got here without medication (which I no longer need to take).

Agree antidepressants can be life changing.
I struggled many years with severe depression and anxiety..although I see many people professionally with mental health issues I just thought I needed to pull myself together. .. it didn’t work.
The side effects are minimal compared to the relief I felt when I started citalopram.
… and I am a doctor. 😉

Thanks all. You’re right in the fact that I shouldn’t stop working, I know that will make me worse.

I know I need to take medication and I want to take it, but it’s like my brain has put a physical block on being able to bring myself to actually do it. I fully expect that if I can’t just get over the initial fear and bite the bullet I will be fine.. but I’m in such a bad health anxiety place that I won’t even take paracetamol (which I’ve taken hundreds of time before) unless I am in absolute agony and can’t sleep it off.

But you are in agony - albeit mental, rather than physical - and you can’t sleep it off.

You are in control of this.

That is not true. The OP may not qualify herself, but mental ill health and/or learning or developmental problems are also qualifying disabilities. PIP is based on impacts, not diagnoses.

That particular poster seems to have a radar for finding threads to celebrate people losing PIP entitlement. You are wasting your time trying to reason with them.

@blueshedhermit The point is that if someone has mental health problems in the formal of social anxiety or agoraphobia then PIP isn't really going to help them in the long term.

Overcoming phobias and other mental health conditions requires effort, anxiety symptoms are horrible and it's much easier to not have to face those symptoms by avoiding whatever it is a person is fearful of. When we don't have a choice it is surprising how strong we can be.

PIP has nothing to do with fitness to work.

Whether or not they are eligible for PIP is different, but exactly what medical qualifications do you have to say that making an effort cures mental health problems?